An Impossible Dream
by Silvermoone
Summary: When Eve was taken to Kinloch Hold, she had no idea of what her future held. It was there that she first met Cullen. But what hope of happiness could there be for a mage of the Circle and a Templar? A/N: I wasn't too happy with my first attempt at this story, so it's been rewritten. Now has 14 extra chapters and is in 3rd person format. :)
1. Chapter 1

**Rejected**

 **Ostwick, 9:18 Dragon**

"We are not keeping that freak in the house!" The words could be heard clearly through the closed door. Eve huddled under her blankets, tears falling freely down her face.  
"Now, Venema, darling, don't be like that. She's still your daughter." Her father, always the peacemaker, was doing his best to calm the situation, but to no avail.  
"No, Frederick, she's dangerous, and I won't have her in this house. Oh Maker, can you imagine what everyone will think if they found out I gave birth to that... that thing!"

Eve buried her face in the pillow to muffle the sounds of her sobs. She hadn't meant to set fire to the sheet of paper, but she'd been frustrated by the test her tutor had given her. History had never been her strongest subject, and as she'd agonised over one of the questions, a flame had blossomed on her hand and quickly spread to the paper.

The tutor had taken one look at the fire covering the child's hands and had run screaming from the room. Her mother had come in some five minutes later, and her face had paled. Grabbing Eve by her ear, Venema had dragged the small child from the room, venting her anger with vitriolic comments. By the time they'd reached Eve's bedchamber, the child had been left with no illusions as to her mother's feelings towards her.

Eve was a danger to everyone, a plaything for demons, an evil child who should never have been born. With these words ringing in her ears, she'd been thrown into her room to await her sentence. And now, here she was, scared and alone, rejected by her parents, and wondering what her future would be.

"I'll send a messenger to Ostwick Circle explaining the situation. I'm sure they'll have Templars here in a day or two," Frederick said, sounding tired.  
"Are you mad? I will not have Templars coming to this house. What will the neighbours think?" Venema retorted indignantly. "No, we'll send her with a servant to the Fereldan Circle."  
"But surely, Ostwick is closer."  
"Which is exactly why we don't want her there. If she's out of the Free Marches, there's less chance that she'll be tied to us."  
"My dear, you're not thinking clearly. People will notice Eve's absence."  
There was barely any hesitation before Venema answered with disastrous clarity. "We'll tell them she died of some childhood illness."  
"No, really! That's going too far."  
"Don't be a fool, Frederick. Would you prefer to see our name brought low by the revelation that we had a mage child?"  
His silence was her answer. "Very well. We'll send her with Joanne and Clegg, they're reliable enough."

Two weeks later, Eve stood on the shore of Lake Calenhad and stared at the tall tower that seemed to rise out of the water. "C'mon, girl. We haven't got all day." Wincing as Joanne gripped her arm in a bruising hold, Eve was pulled over to the ferryman. The man smiled at Eve. "Hello there, young'un. I'm Kester. What's your name?"  
The small girl looked nervously to her travelling companions. "Answer the man," Clegg ordered in a sharp tone.  
Returning her gaze to the ferryman, she replied, "I'm Evelyn Trevelyan, but you can call me Eve."  
Kester made a little bow. "Why, thank you, Eve. I hear you're a mage?"  
She nodded, eyeing him warily, having come to expect only anger and contempt when people knew what she was.  
"That makes you special," Kester said with a gentle smile. "That's why you have to live with other mages and be trained to use your talents."

Clegg snorted. "Don't fill the girl's head with such stupid notions. She's being locked away for the rest of her life because she's dangerous. Nothing more and nothing less!"  
Kester threw a disgusted glare at the man before turning his attention back to the child. With ease, he lifted her and carried her onto the boat, whispering, "Don't you take no heed of your pa, young'un. He's talking out his ass."  
Eve giggled. "You said a bad word."  
Kester grinned at her. "So I did. We'll keep that between ourselves. Your ma and pa don't need to know about that."

Eve glanced at Joanne and Clegg as they carefully climbed aboard. "They're not my parents. My mother and father don't want anything to do with me," she told him.  
Kester looked down into large grey eyes shining with unshed tears and felt a pang of sympathy for the girl. Having three kids of his own, he found it hard to understand how parents could so easily cast off a child. "Well, don't you worry, Eve, you'll be accepted here."  
Kester chatted easily during the journey across the lake, undeterred by the venomous glances being thrown his way by the girl's travelling companions.

Arriving at the tower, Eve found herself being lifted and carried off the boat by the friendly ferryman. He put her down, and with a smile, told her, "No need to look so anxious, little one. You're going to do just fine." With a friendly ruffle of her chestnut hair, he made his way back to the boat.

Eve climbed the stairs, swallowing past a lump in her throat as she reached the top and looked at two massive doors. She wanted to run back to Kester and ask him to take her away, but she knew that wasn't an option. Clegg walked forward and banged his fist on the door. It was opened almost immediately by a Templar. "State your business."  
Clegg was a little taken aback by the barked command, and stammered, "I'm... er... I mean, we are here to drop off this mage child."

It was hard to get a read on the Templar due to the helmet he wore, but the man pulled the door open and gestured for them to enter. "Wait here while I get the Knight-Commander and First Enchanter."

The doors were closed with a resounding slam that made Eve jump, and as unkind as Joanne and Clegg were, Eve moved closer to them, scared of the big men in their heavy armour. The woman pushed Eve away, saying to her husband, "I don't see why we have to wait. They've got the child, surely we can leave now?"

Another Templar stepped forward, removing his helmet as he spoke. "No, you need to speak to the Knight-Commander first."  
Joanne subsided into a sullen silence, and the Templar looked down at the little girl. "Are you going to be staying with us?"  
Eve nodded but chose to remain silent. The man didn't seem to be angry, but he also didn't seem as friendly as the ferryman, and he had a very deep, booming voice that was a little frightening.  
"Well, as long as you behave yourself, you'll be fine."  
Eve nodded again.  
A door at the other end of the large reception hall was opened and in walked two older men, one looking stern, the other friendly. The Templar who had been talking to her stood to attention and Knight-Commander Greagoir inclined his head. "You can return to your post, Knight-Lieutenant Bran."  
"Yes, Knight-Commander."

Eve watched the Templar take up his position at the side of the door, whilst the Knight-Commander went to talk to Joanne and Clegg. She could hear the conversation and the stern man sounded angry.  
"This is your child?" Greagoir asked brusquely.  
Clegg's face took on a sour look. "No, Ser. We're just doing our duty by bringing a mage to the Circle."  
Greagoir stared coldly at the man. "Your duty would have been to call the Templars. It is for them to bring in any mages."

Clegg glared at Eve, as though it was her fault that they were being scolded. Feeling overwhelmed, Eve started to back away but was stopped by the friendly-looking man who knelt down in front of her and smiled. "I'm First Enchanter Irving. What's your name?"  
Too scared to talk above anything louder than a whisper, she replied, "I'm Evelyn Trevelyan, but I prefer Eve."  
"It's nice to meet you, Eve. You look tired, have you travelled a long way?"  
Fidgeting with the buttons on her coat, she said, "We've come from Ostwick."

Hearing this, Irving turned and addressed Clegg. "Your accent isn't Ferelden, and the child tells me you've travelled from Ostwick."  
Greagoir's eyebrows shot up. "That's a long journey. Why not take her to a closer Circle?"  
This time it was Joanne who shot Eve a furious glare as Clegg replied, "Her parents didn't want her anywhere near them." Seeing the flicker of anger in the First Enchanter's gaze, he added, "It would have been too painful for them, you see."

It was Greagoir who answered, "Yes, I think we see only too well." He glanced over to Irving. "Why don't you get the child settled, and I'll finish up here."  
The First Enchanter nodded his approval and after taking Eve's hand, led her away, saying, "You must be hungry. Why don't we go and get you something nice to eat."

When the doors had closed behind them, Greagoir turned back to the couple. "Now, let me have the truth. How did her magic manifest, and did she hurt anyone?"  
Stoically, he listened to their story, and by the end of it, he'd come to the conclusion that the child had a great deal of control for one new to their abilities.

He dismissed the couple with a curt goodbye and thanked the Maker that they seemed to have received a talented mage, rather than another troublemaker. They already had enough of those in Kinloch Hold.


	2. Chapter 2

**Punishment**

 **Kinloch Hold, 9:22 Dragon**

In the four years since Eve had joined the Circle, she'd managed to make some good friends and they'd been instrumental in helping her settle down to her new life. One such friend was Solona Amell, a young mage who had arrived at the Circle a few months after Eve. The two had hit it off straight away and spent many a night discussing what their life would be like now that they were part of the Circle. Some of the conversations had ended in tears which had drawn them closer together. Within each girl there was an edge of bitterness at the hand fate had dealt them. This, in turn, led to the two friends finding some relief in their unhappiness by carrying out the occasional pranks.

It was a warm sunny day as Eve and Solona trudged down the corridor towards their next class. "I'd rather be doing anything than sitting through another lesson with Sweeney."  
Solona nodded. "Theory lessons are bad enough, but he's so boring."  
"Yeah," Eve agreed. "The fact that he falls asleep in his own class shows just how boring he is. Shouldn't he be put out to pasture now?"  
"I don't know. You can't exactly retire from being a mage, can you?"

When they entered the classroom they found that Senior Enchanter Sweeney hadn't yet arrived. A devilish gleam entered Eve's eyes and she pulled Solona over to the large blackboard. "He can't really teach if he hasn't got a blackboard to write on," Eve said.  
Solona stared at her, a mischievous smile curling her lips. "What are you thinking?"

In answer, Eve placed her hand on one side of the board and ice crystals started creeping across the dark slate. Solona caught on quickly and moved to the other side. Soon the blackboard was covered with a thick layer of ice. The other children in the class laughed and clapped at what they considered to be the best joke yet.

The two girls moved to their seats and sat down, looking for all the world like butter wouldn't melt in their mouths. Sweeney walked into the room and placed his books on the desk without noticing the state of the board. There were a few muffled giggles as they anticipated the teacher's reaction. He stared at them, and following the direction of their eyes, turned and discovered the prank. His face became red and he spun around to face the classroom. The children just laughed harder.

"Who did this?" The fury in his tone cut through the hilarity and silence descended over the room. He slapped his stick against the board. "Do you think magic is a joke? Something to be used for trivial mischief?"  
A few nervous giggles were his only reply. Amidst the hush, a creaking, groaning sound could be heard, starting low but quickly becoming louder. Eve looked at Solona, a puzzled frown on her face, and her friend returned the look with a lift of her shoulder.

Then the unthinkable happened. The blackboard, weighed down by the ice, fell from the wall and landed squarely on Sweeney. There was a collective gasp of horror, then Solona and Eve ran to the teacher. Staring at the blood pooling from beneath the man's body, Eve's stomach curdled at the possibility that she'd killed someone. Solona grabbed her arm. "He's still alive. Go and get help."

It took a moment for her friend's words to sink through the fear that clouded Eve's brain, but then she stood and ran to the classroom next door. "Wynne, we need help."  
Seeing the pallor of the girl's skin, Wynne didn't waste time with questions, and after telling her class to continue reading, she followed Eve.

It was touch and go, but through Wynne's healing, Sweeney was saved. When the man had been taken to his quarters to rest, First Enchanter Irving addressed the class. "Who was responsible for this?"  
Without hesitation, both Eve and Solona stood up. "It was me," they said simultaneously. Eve shook her head. "It was my idea."  
But her friend refused to back down. "Yes, but no one twisted my arm to help you."  
Irving banged his staff on the ground. "I want both of you in my office, right now!" The two girls, heads hung in shame, followed the First Enchanter.

Standing in front of Irving, Eve twisted her hands nervously. She was trying desperately to keep her lunch down, but the image of the thick pool of blood kept intruding upon her thoughts. The door opened and the Knight-Commander walked in, looking grim. "These are the two responsible for that atrocious prank?"  
Irving nodded. "Sit down, girls."  
Eve gratefully obeyed, glad to take the weight off her trembling legs. When Solona had followed suit, Irving spoke, "What in the Maker's name were you thinking? Do you understand just how dangerous your silly joke was?"  
They nodded. Eve could hear her mother's voice whispering in the back of her mind, telling her how dangerous she was. A shiver crawled down her spine as she wondered whether her mother had been in the right of it.

Greagoir slammed his hand down on the desk, pulling Eve from her unpleasant thoughts. "Answer him!"  
Eve flinched, but managed to stammer, "Yes, First Enchanter." Solona's answer was spoken in a clear, confident voice, and Eve felt a swell of admiration for her friend who refused to be cowed.

"Magic is not something to be trifled with. We're trying to teach you that, but it doesn't seem to be getting through to either of you. What excuse do you have for playing such trick on the Senior Enchanter?"  
Before they could answer, Greagoir said, "This isn't exactly their first prank, Irving. There have been numerous such incidents carried out on both Templar and mage. It's got to stop!"  
Irving rubbed a hand over his face. "I know, Knight-Commander, but I'd still like to hear their reasons."

Eve shifted nervously in her chair. "It was just to get out of class. We didn't mean for him to be injured."  
"You don't think theory lessons are as important as the practical lessons?" Irving asked.  
Solona answered. "It's not that so much, although the practical lessons are more fun, it's just that Senior Enchanter Sweeney isn't the most lively teacher."  
With a nod, Eve backed her up. "That's right. He takes ages explaining things and by the time he's finished, you've forgotten what he was talking about. Also, he falls asleep."

Irving coughed to cover up the smile playing on his lips, however, Greagoir was most certainly not amused. "This is no laughing matter, First Enchanter, they nearly killed someone. I expect these two troublemakers to be punished."  
"What would you suggest, Knight-Commander?"  
"A week in isolation."  
The First Enchanter raised a shocked brow. "I think you're forgetting that they are still just children."  
Greagoir met the troubled eyes of Irving. "I'm not, but you seem to be forgetting that their actions today nearly resulted in a death. It was only Wynne's skill at healing that prevented this situation from becoming a tragedy. They need to learn that magic is not for their amusement."

Shaking, Eve stood up. "It was my idea, therefore it should be my punishment."  
Solona exclaimed at this, but Knight-Commander Greagoir overrode her. "Agreed." With a gesture, he ushered Eve from the room.


	3. Chapter 3

**Isolation**

Eve looked neither left nor right as she was escorted through the hallways. She could feel the eyes of the other mages and Templars watching her, and their disapproval weighed heavily on her shoulders. But eventually, it was just Eve and Greagoir as they descended the final stairway.

Fear stole her breath as she looked down the length of the long corridor, lit only by the occasional flickering torch. Greagoir's hand took hold of her shoulder, pulling her to a halt. There was a loud click followed by the squeak of hinges and Eve got her first look at what would be her room for the next week. It was a small cell with a tiny square window high up the wall. In one corner there was a bucket covered with a cloth, and opposite that was a thin, hard bed pushed up against a wall. And, finally, a small stand at the bottom of the bed held a bowl and a jug of water.

She walked in and the darkness closed around her. Quickly, she turned. "Can I have a candle?"  
Greagoir's expression was uncompromising. "No, and do not use your magic, or your time here will be extended. Your night clothes will be brought down shortly. You will not talk to the person, nor will they speak to you. You will receive three meals a day and a change of clothing will be delivered with your breakfast. Your bucket will be emptied once a day."

Eve fought back the sting of tears, and asked, "Can I have a book to read during the day?"  
"No. I suggest you take this time to reflect on your actions and how you can improve your behaviour."  
With that said, the door was closed and locked. Eve felt her way carefully to the bed, then screamed as something scuttled across her foot. She nimbly jumped onto the mattress and pulled the blanket around her. In the darkness and complete silence, the faces of her parents drifted before her eyes and their voices whispered into her ear, 'You're dangerous. You should have been a stain on the sheet. You're evil. You nearly killed someone. You should be put down like a rabid dog.'

Eve pushed her hands against her ears. "Stop it," she whispered. "Please, stop." But the cruel words continued; each barb tearing at her soul and shredding her confidence until she screamed out in anguish, "Stop it!"

The whispering ended abruptly, leaving Eve momentarily stunned and disoriented. A sharp rap on the door froze her body with fear, and she gripped the blanket with white-knuckled fingers. A slot was pulled open and something was pushed through. Recalling Greagoir's words about her night clothes and not wanting them to fall on the floor, Eve jumped off the bed and took them. Her mouth opened, ready to thank the person but then she remembered the rules and instead returned to her bed.

In the pitch black, it felt as though the walls were closing in. Panicked, she almost summoned a fireball to push back the dark, but the thought of spending more time than was necessary within the small cell brought her actions to a halt. Instead, she slid beneath the blanket, turned on her side and tried to sleep. However, her mind refused to shut down as images of the day replayed with horrifying clarity. Angrily, she swiped at the tears that trickled down her face, knowing she had no one to blame but herself.

Eve resolved never again to use her magic for her own amusement, and to pay attention during class. Even the theory lessons, she firmly told herself. Of course, the first thing she would do once she was out of isolation was apologise to poor Senior Enchanter Sweeney. More and more resolutions were added to the growing list, but at some point, exhaustion caught up and Eve dropped into an uneasy sleep.

The next morning, Eve was determined to keep her spirits up, however, her enthusiasm was slightly dampened by the dreary grey sky and the patter of rain on her tiny window. Breakfast was delivered in silence along with a change of clothes. Deciding to keep herself busy, she searched the small cell in the hope of finding whatever had scuttled over her foot last night.  
Unfortunately, this proved to be a fruitless task and was completed before her lunch had been delivered. It was with some trepidation that Eve began to understand that time passed a lot more slowly when there was nothing for her to do.

By the end of the second day, Eve was struggling to maintain her cheerful attitude as boredom whittled away at her mind. Still, she made an effort to move around and spent the day going over lessons in the hope of keeping her mind active. If she was being honest with herself, it was also to distract her from the approaching nights.

When the light started fading, she would jump on her bed and wrap the blanket around her shoulders. In the oppressive darkness, time seemed to slow to a snail's crawl. With nothing to occupy her mind, it was left to its own devices, and a child's brain can conjure up some horrifying thoughts. Eve was hoping that she'd get used to the pitch black, but so far that hadn't happened.  
On the fourth night, Eve found a way to combat the fear of the thick, choking blackness; she curled up on the bed and withdrew into herself.

Trent, the kitchen-hand who entered her room that night to collect the bucket, rolled his eyes at the untouched food. Her loss, he thought as he closed and locked the door behind him. When Trent entered on the fifth day, the three trays of food hadn't even been moved. He glanced at the girl but decided that she was just sleeping. Not his problem if she wasn't hungry.

It was day six for Eve but she had long since stopped counting. Knight-Lieutenant Adir had finished his shift and was on his way back to his quarters when he saw Trent heading down to the cells. "How is she?" he asked.  
The kitchen-hand shrugged his shoulders. "She's being a drama queen. Thinks she'll get out faster if she doesn't eat."  
Adir's brows pulled down. "How long has it been since she stopped eating?"  
"I dunno," Trent replied unhelpfully. "I'm just going down there. I bet she's eaten everything by now."  
The lad's lackadaisical attitude riled Adir, but he managed to keep a hold on his temper. "Go back to the kitchen. I'll check on her."

Another shrug of shoulders was the only answer he got. Adir muttered under his breath and descended the stairs while trying to ignore the twisting feeling in his gut that told him something was wrong.  
The door scraped against stone as he pulled it back and stepped inside. The thin shaft of light that spilled into the room from the torches did little to disperse the darkness. A glance around the small cell showed that there was no candle. Frowning, Adir sidestepped the trays of untouched food and knelt by the side of the bed. At first glance, he'd thought the girl was dead, mostly because her eyes were open and staring blankly ahead. Sweat sprung up on his brow and his stomach rolled uncomfortably at the thought that they'd let this young child die alone in a cell.  
He ripped off his gauntlet and with a trembling hand, he placed two fingers against her throat. Beneath his fingers, a weak pulse fluttered and he blew out a relieved breath.

Carefully, Adir picked up Eve and sprinted from the room. His destination was the First Enchanter's office, but as luck would have it, he met Wynne first. Knowing her healing ability was one of the best in the Circle, he quickly explained the situation. Wynne directed him to an empty room where he laid the child on the sofa. "I assume your next stop will be the offices of Greagoir and Irving?" she asked.  
"Yes, and I think a visit to the kitchens is in order, too."


	4. Chapter 4

**Recriminations**

Whether Wynne heard his reply was debatable as she was bent over the child and a silvery glow emanated from her hands. Adir knew he should go to see the two leaders of the Circle, but he needed to vent some of his anger before facing his Knight-Commander. Knowing the decision to isolate the child had been Greagoir's, Adir wasn't sure he'd be able to maintain a respectful demeanour with the way he was feeling.

Knight-Lieutenant Adir stormed into the kitchen. "Who's been preparing the trays for the mage in solitary?"  
A thin woman with a pinched face stepped forward, wiping her hands on a towel. "Name's Dara, and I've been making sure those trays are ready. Is there a problem?"  
That depends," Adir said. "How many of the trays have been returned untouched?"  
A young elf stepped forward. "I do the washing up, Ser Knight, and the food hasn't been eaten since dinner on the fourth night."  
Adir scrubbed a hand over his face. "Why, in the Maker's name, didn't you say something, boy?"  
The elf threw a scared glance at the cook. "I tried to tell Dara, but she said it had nothing to do with her."

A hint of anger glinted in Adir's dark blue eyes as he addressed the cook. "Is this true?"  
The woman sniffed and shrugged her shoulders. "Well, it's got nothing to do with me whether the girl eats her food or not. She ought to be grateful she's getting anything at all after what she did."

Fury edged his voice as he strode towards the woman. "And you think her death is an acceptable punishment for a child's prank?"  
Dara's eyes widened and a shadow of fear flickered across her face. "She ain't gonna die. The little brat is getting freed tomorrow."  
"Get out! Pack your bags and leave." Adir's thundering voice made Dara jump and back up a step. "You ain't got the right to sack me," she argued tremulously.  
"Trust me, when the Knight-Commander knows what happened, your job will be history." Unable to trust himself to say anything more, he turned swiftly on his heel and made his way to the Greagoir's office.

He knocked and entered at Greagoir's bidding. "What is it, Knight-Lieutenant?"  
Adir explained the situation. Uttering a slew of curse words, the Knight-Commander swiftly made his way to Irving, and the two of them followed Adir back to the room where he'd left Wynne and Eve.

Upon entering, they saw Solona sitting on the couch and holding a glass of water to Eve's lips. Glancing over her shoulder and seeing the men responsible for her friend's state, she threw them a scathing look before returning her attention back to Eve.  
Irving moved over to Wynne. "How is she?"  
Anger snapped in the Senior Enchanter's blue eyes. "About what you'd expect after locking a child in a dark room for a week without any contact."  
"Wynne..." Irving held up his hands in a placating manner. "We didn't leave her in a dark room. There was a window and of course, we supplied her with a candle and whatever else she needed."

Greagoir cleared his throat, but before he could speak, Adir joined the conversation. "With all due respect, First Enchanter, that's bullshit. There was no candle in her room and no books or puzzles to keep her mind occupied."  
All eyes turned towards the Knight-Commander and he scrubbed a hand over his eyes as he faced his accusers. "I thought she should spend the week contemplating her actions and the consequences. I had no idea she was scared of the dark," he finished defensively.

Solona put down the glass after it seemed Eve had fallen asleep and made her voice heard. Hands on hips, a glint of anger in her deep blue eyes, the young girl faced them with no fear. "Andraste's flaming ass! You're blaming Eve for this?"  
Greagoir reddened. "No, that's not-"  
Solona cut him off, impatient with the adults and their excuses. "I'll have you know that she wasn't afraid of the dark before you put her in there."

Remembering the lost, terrified look in Eve's large grey eyes, Solona's fury ratcheted up a notch. "You treated her like she was a criminal. She didn't try to kill Sweeney, that was an accident."  
Greagoir again tried to speak. "Regardless, her actions did injure someone."  
A sneer curled Solona's lips. "Yes, isn't hindsight wonderful? Do you really think she would have iced up the blackboard if she'd had even an inkling of someone getting hurt?"  
Rubbing the back of his neck, Greagoir was forced to admit that she wouldn't.

Wynne stepped in, bringing some calm to the heated argument. "Solona, I know you're upset, but you know that neither Irving or Greagoir would have allowed her condition to deteriorate if they'd known how bad things were."  
Solona breathed out through her nose as she tried to regain a measure of composure. "Then who was responsible for checking on her?"

Adir decided that Trent's life wouldn't be worth living if Solona got her hands on him, so he kept quiet, but he intended to make the Knight-Commander fully aware of the man's part in all this. And, if need be, he would be happy to throw the bastard off the premises.

It took a few days for Eve to physically recover from the experience, and months before the nightmares lessened. Her fear of enclosed spaces never left her.


	5. Chapter 5

**A New Arrival**

**Kinloch Hold - 9:29 Dragon**

Seven years later, and the only sign of the trauma that Eve experienced was her tendency to withdraw to a window seat in the library when she needed a bit of space. It was here that Solona found her friend. "A new Templar arrived today."  
Eve lifted her eyes from the book she was reading. "You're not normally this excited about a new arrival."  
Solona chuckled. "Anders has already seen the man and says he's cute."  
Laughing, Eve closed her book. "Come on then. Let's go and take a look."

Linking arms, Solona dragged her friend down the corridor. A few minutes later, Eve was pulled to a halt. "Oh, there he is."  
Eve glanced over her friend's shoulder to get a better look and felt a flutter in her stomach.  
"Hmm, I think Anders exaggerated," Solona said with a chuckle. Not receiving a response, she glanced at her friend. Seeing the small smile playing on Eve's lips and the soft glow in her eyes, she prodded Eve's arm. "You like him."  
Feeling her face flush, Eve quickly dismissed the claim. "Don't be silly. He's nice enough, I suppose."

After one more glance, she turned around, intent on going back to the library.  
"Wait, where are you going?" Solona asked.  
"Well, we've had a look, so I was going to go and finish my book."  
"Nonsense, we haven't even seen the colour of his eyes yet. Come on, we should go and introduce ourselves."  
The fluttering in Eve's stomach kicked into a full-blown swarm. "Ah, I don't think that's a good idea."  
But Solona wasn't taking no for an answer and grabbing Eve's arm she practically dragged her down the corridor, only letting go when they were too close for Eve to do anything but follow her friend.

Holding out a hand, Solona smiled. "You must be Cullen?"  
The young Templar's eyes widened slightly as he looked at the beautiful woman. He put out his hand. "Um, yes, and you are?"  
"Solona Amell, still an apprentice, but we're hoping to take our Harrowing next year, isn't that right, Eve?"  
Eve opened her mouth, ready to respond just as Cullen turned his gaze on her. She looked into warm, honey-brown eyes and whatever she was going to say died a swift death on her lips.  
Cullen looked at Eve. "Are you all right?" he asked.  
"No, I'm Eve."  
Oh, Maker, she was an idiot. "I mean, yes, I'm fine, thanks."  
Solona bit her lip in an effort to hold back the giggles as she watched her bashful friend become unravelled.

Cullen smiled and put out his hand. "It's nice to meet you, Eve."  
The smile was everything Eve could have hoped for, and she tried to calm the butterflies in her stomach which were now completely out of control as she reached for his hand. However, being unable to tear her gaze from his face, she wasn't looking where she was putting her hand and only realised she'd missed when her knuckles rapped against his armour.

"Shit!" She clutched her hand, rubbing at the red mark. With an effort, she managed to look away from his breathtaking eyes and took his hand. "It's nice to meet you, too," she managed with only the bare modicum of stammering.

Seeing her friend stuck for words, Solona came to the rescue. "Well, we'd better be going. Welcome to the Fereldan Circle, Cullen."  
Eve, who felt she was in imminent danger of spontaneously combusting, took two steps and promptly tripped over her robe. Cullen moved towards her. "Are you okay?"  
Solona, hearing the fall, quickly went to her friend's aid. "Did that hem come down again?" she said as she and Cullen helped Eve to her feet.  
Her colour was heightened as she cleared her throat and agreed with Solona's comment. "Ah, yeah, I should... um..." She became distracted at the sight of Cullen's hand around her forearm.  
"You should get that sewn up, right?" Solona said, her voice trembling with amusement.  
Eve looked up quickly, startled out of the pleasant thoughts she'd been having and the top of her head connected to Cullen's chin.

The two staggered back, each rubbing the affected area. Solona barely managed to contain her laughter as she tried to decide who to help first. Eve was looking a bit dazed, but the new Templar was obviously made of sterner stuff as he dropped his hand and looked at Solona. "Perhaps you should take your friend to a healer and make sure she's not injured."  
Eve managed an apologetic smile before she was dragged away. Once they were far enough way, Eve ran a hand over her face. "Maker's balls, I told you that was a bad idea."  
Solona burst out laughing. "I was just trying to prove my point."  
"Which was?"  
"That you like him."  
"Yeah, and a fat lot of good that does me. My first crush has to be on a Templar. I think my brain must be screwed up."  
Solona patted Eve's shoulder sympathetically. "Never mind, I'm sure you'll get over it soon." 


	6. Chapter 6

**The Harrowing**

 **Kinloch Hold - 9:30 Dragon**

However, as the months passed, Eve found her thoughts turning more and more towards the handsome Templar. The whole situation was frustrating for two simple reasons: firstly, he was a Templar and so nothing could ever happen between them, and secondly, he only had eyes for Solona. Eve berated herself for being an idiot, then decided Cullen was too, because who'd ever heard of a mage having a crush on a Templar, and vice versa?

With a bittersweet smile, Eve watched his eyes following Solona as she walked past him. Tearing her gaze away, she smiled at Solona. "How goes the mentoring?"  
"So-so, there are some mages who show potential. But never mind that. I heard that Anders is back again."  
Eve chuckled. "That poor guy just can't catch a break. So where is he?"  
Solona filled her plate with food. "Oh, he's in isolation." She realised her mistake as soon as the words left her mouth. Noticing the tremor in Eve's hands, Solona laid one of her own over the closest. "Sorry, Eve."  
With a slightly forced smile, she shrugged away the memories. "It's all right. I know people are still held in... in isolation." Wishing to change the subject, she asked, "So, who told you about Anders?"

She had to wait for a reply as they wended their way through the tables until they found an empty seat.  
"Jowan overheard a couple of Templars talking."  
Eve shivered. "I don't know why you hang out with that guy, he makes me nervous."  
Solona laughed. "Don't be silly. He's harmless enough."  
The conversation moved on, but Eve wished that her friend would distance herself from Jowan. There was something about the man that she found disturbing.

With lunch over, Solona went back to her mentoring and Eve returned to the library. Picking up her book, she found her thoughts dwelling on the Harrowing. Having reached her eighteenth birthday two days ago, she knew it should happen soon, or rather, she hoped it would happen soon. It was a worrying time waiting to hear about the final test. Each day that passed without word of the Harrowing meant that both the First Enchanter and the Knight-Commander considered the mage unprepared, which in turn, meant the chances of becoming a tranquil increased.

Eve shuddered at the thought of the tranquil; the poor sods lost everything after the rite. No emotions, no magic, no dreams – they were basically a shell of their former selves. Maker's breath, she hoped that didn't happen to her - she'd rather be dead. However, Eve felt fairly confident in her ability to pass the Harrowing, although that thought raised another concern – perhaps she was over-confident?

She exhaled slowly, trying to ease the tension in her shoulders. In all likelihood, she was worrying over nothing. After ten minutes, she still hadn't progressed any further down the page, and blaming the book, she went to the shelves to choose something else. The walk took her past Cullen, and unable to resist, she glanced over to him and looked straight into his warm brown eyes.

A flush covered her cheeks and a silly grin spread across her face, but this quickly disappeared as she walked into a table. She swore under her breath and wondered if she'd just broken her toe. After contemplating it and realising she could still move her toe around, she decided it was just bruised. Lifting her head, she found Eadric, glaring at her. "Watch where you're going. Now I've lost my page."  
She smiled apologetically at the elven mage. "Sorry about that."

After grabbing a book, she was in the act of returning to her seat when a messenger stopped her. "The First Enchanter would like to see you."  
Cold fear shot through her veins. Oh Maker, was this the call to take her Harrowing?  
"I think he meant now, apprentice."  
For just a moment, her body wouldn't respond and she had an image of being carried to the Harrowing Chamber. It was so ridiculous that she felt the urge to giggle, which, thankfully, had the effect of dispersing the fear.

By the time she'd made her way to Irving's office, however, the anxiety was back in full force. She tried to tell herself that it might not even be about her test, but deep down she knew that was a lie. After taking a few seconds to compose herself, she knocked and entered at Irving's bidding. The aroma of dusty old tomes and elfroot tea was familiar and went some way towards calming her.

Irving's keen eyes travelled over her face, noting the pale cheeks. "How are you, Eve?" he asked with a smile. Returning it, she started to answer him, but the smile slipped when she saw Knight-Commander Greagoir standing off to the side, looking grim and foreboding.  
Turning a scared face towards Irving, her eyes held a question. He inclined his head. "It is time for you to complete your training." He gestured towards the door and, turning, Eve saw a complement of Templars lined up in the corridor waiting to escort her to the Harrowing Chamber.

Her legs felt like rubber and a heavy weight sat on her chest. Oh shit, she wasn't ready for this! The thought bounced around her skull like a frightened rabbit. She followed Irving and Greagoir into the hallway. They moved to the front of the procession and she walked between the two rows of Templars. Upon hearing footsteps behind her, she glanced over her shoulder and saw another Templar move to take up the rear position. With everyone in place, the solemn procession walked towards the chamber.

Maker's balls, she felt like she was being led to her execution.

The few torches bolted to the wall cast long, eerie shadows around the large Chamber, and Eve cast a nervous glance around at the Templars, all solemn in their gleaming armour. Sharp weapons at their side glinted dangerously ready to cut her down if she became possessed. A fearful thought that Eve tried her best to dismiss.

Frightened, she came to a halt, but a hand rested on her upper arm, gently moving her forward. She glanced up as the Templar removed his helmet and found herself looking into the face of Cullen. There was no smile, but his brown eyes held a gleam of understanding that reassured Eve.

With a burst of courage, she walked over to the First Enchanter, while trying to ignore the serious expression on the Knight-Commander's face. Her gaze was drawn to the centre of the chamber where a bowl of glowing lyrium sat atop a metal stand. Then, her gaze dropped to the floor and she wondered just how many mages had died there with a sword through their chest.

Her heart was beating so loudly that it took a moment for her to realise that Irving was talking. Even knowing that he was offering her some helpful tips to deal with what was to come, she found it difficult to concentrate on what the First Enchanter was saying because she couldn't stop thinking of the mages who had failed.

"You are ready, apprentice." Greagoir's encouraging tone cut through her unpleasant reverie. With a nervous gulp, she nodded, and, with shaking legs, approached the bowl. A moment she allowed herself to look upon the glowing liquid, then her fingers dipped into the lyrium and a shot of power rushed through her veins.

Cullen caught her body as she slumped, and lowered her to the ground, then drawing his sword, he stood over her, praying that he wouldn't have to kill her.


	7. Chapter 7

**A Lesson Learned**

Tentatively raising one eyelid, Eve glanced around, expecting to see a huge demon blocking her way. However, upon seeing the familiar corridors of the tower, she quickly opened both eyes. Had the spell failed, or had she already completed her Harrowing? She was really hoping it was the latter. But, in the midst of congratulating herself for completing the test so quickly that she couldn't even remember it, she suddenly realised how quiet it was.

Maybe the Circle had run into trouble? At this thought, she reached for her staff, ready to fight, and found it was missing. She never left her quarters without her staff, a rather pitiful apprentice staff, admittedly, but a staff nonetheless. Eve sighed as it slowly dawned on her that she was still in the Fade. A closer look at her surroundings confirmed this. Disjointed was the best way to describe it - everything looked right but felt wrong - like a new shoe that rubbed at the heel.

Feeling a little nervous, Eve decided to check that her magic was working. A fireball flared into existence and hovered over the palm of her hand. She blew out a sigh of relief, feeling somewhat cheered by the proof of her magic. Surely that was the most important thing? But her brain prodded at her with doubtful fingers. Eve rubbed a hand through her hair, wishing she'd paid more attention to Irving. However, standing around wasn't going to get the Harrowing finished, and she knew there was a time limit, of sorts. If she spent too long in the Fade, Greagoir would assume she was lost and order her to be killed.

The grey stone walls of the corridor stretched before her, made ominous by the dim light from the flickering torches. With a fatalistic shrug, she started walking. A minute later, Eve rounded a corner and came to an abrupt halt; Solona was pressed up against a wall - with Knight-Lieutenant Cullen doing the pressing. They were smiling and talking quietly, their eyes alight with love. His head slowly dipped and their lips met in a sensuous kiss. It was the kiss she'd always dreamed of having with him.

A painful breath caught in Eve's throat and unshed tears stung her eyes. There was a tight pain in her chest and she was surprised at just how upsetting it was to see him with someone else.  
With a sinking feeling in her stomach, she realised her feelings for the Templar had gone way past that of a crush. Eve had been clinging to the hope that her infatuation would ease up at some point, but that expectation had just been destroyed in a brutal manner. Maker, but she was an idiot!

A thin thread of anger twisted around her heart at the way she'd been forced to acknowledge her feelings for Cullen. However, this emotion was pushed aside as the kiss between Solona and Cullen became more passionate causing an anguished groan to slip from Eve's lips. At the sound, the two lovers broke apart; she to bury her head against his chest, he to stare at Eve with disinterested eyes.

She turned away then, unable to bear the sight any longer. Walking quickly along the corridors, Eve retreated to her favourite place in the tower. The library was comfortable and familiar, a place where she could take a moment to put her thoughts in order. Upon entering the large room, she was shocked to find it so empty. Generally, the library was the hub of the mage tower where people went to study or quietly chat. The silence was disturbing and unnatural, and it tightened Eve's already taut nerves to the point of snapping.

Weaving her way through the tall bookcases, she walked towards her favourite seat while trying to shake off the cold fear that clung to her like a shadow. A heart-wrenching sob broke the stillness and Eve muffled a surprised cry of her own as she spun on her heels looking for the source. Following the loud sobs, she found a young woman sitting at a desk, shoulders hunched over a book, tears wetting the pages below. Her crumpled posture and sorrowful cries demanded compassion from all who saw her, and Eve's heart swelled with pity.

Walking over to the desk, she put an arm around the woman's thin shoulders. Eve didn't recognise her and guessed she must have only recently arrived at the tower.  
"I hate the Circle," the woman declared vehemently. Surprised at the sudden change in temperament, Eve dropped her arm from the woman. The rage in the stranger's voice was disturbing and Eve took a step back, afraid that the woman might lash out and hit her.

The woman brushed away more tears as she told her story. "I was going to be married, have children, settle down to a long life with the man I loved. And then the Templars came. They ripped me from the arms of my fiancé and dragged me here, to be locked away forever."

Eve felt a strong empathy for the woman's sad story. Recalling the late night talks she'd had with Solona, she started to see just how shitty life was in the Circle. Perhaps, if she hadn't been a mage, she might have had a chance with Cullen. In her mind, she could see herself being married, waking up next to him every day, having his children - just leading a normal, happy life. She clung to the vivid vision and a dark shadow closed around her heart as she accepted that this life could never be hers.

The stranger reached out and touched Eve's arm, "You know what I mean, don't you? Look at the way you've been treated."  
"It hasn't been that bad," Eve said, feeling some loyalty towards the Circle. "I've made some good friends here."  
The woman leaned closer. "But where were your friends when they threw you in a cell? Just a child, too. I've seen dogs treated better than that."

Another vision flooded her senses, so real that it stole her breath. Terrified, Eve recognised the small cell, saw herself huddled on the mattress, scared and lonely. Her subconscious screamed at her that something was wrong, but it was muffled by the fear that had seeped into her heart. Her brain, however, would not be silenced and continued to bombard her with warnings until it pierced the bubble of terror that encompassed her.  
"I'm not really here," she whispered, then said it again, stronger, louder, and abruptly the vision disappeared.

The stranger had moved next to Eve and placed a comforting arm around her shoulders. "I know what you need, and I can give it to you – love, revenge, a normal life – I can give you everything you've ever desired."  
But Eve was more alert now and wholly aware of the niggling prodding sensation in her brain that told her she was in danger.  
Moving away from the woman, Eve asked, "If you can do all that for me, why can't you help yourself?"  
The stranger shook her head, her expression sorrowful. "It's too late for me, but you still have a chance."

The warning signal had turned into a blaring alarm now, and with a gasp, Eve remembered she was in the Fade, and none of this was real. With her eyes fully open to the situation, she asked the stranger, "And what would you want in return for this help?"

The woman seemed to shimmer and blur for a split second, but it was enough to drive home the danger. Eve quickly backed away while reaching for her staff. Now that she was once again aware of being in the Fade, she was unsurprised when her hands grasped firm wood - knowing that her own will had brought the staff into being.

The woman stood, and as she did, her human form fell away to reveal a Desire Demon. Eve drew in a sharp breath and prepared a spell. In response, the demon laughed a low and husky sound that conjured up images of intimacy and... well, desire. "No need for that, apprentice. You've passed your test. But oh, I was close to having your soul. Your instincts are good though, so listen to them."  
Then she was gone, as were the surroundings, and Eve felt herself falling into darkness. 


	8. Chapter 8

**A Good Day**

Stretching out and feeling the sheets sliding over her body, Eve yawned lazily. Upon opening her eyes, she recognised a lightness in her mood, as though a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. As the last of the sleep dissipated, Eve remembered the Harrowing and understood the reason for her happiness. Having successfully completed the test, Eve would now become a fully fledged mage of the Circle.

Walking to a large mirror at the end of the dormitory she took a good look at herself. Large, pale grey eyes stared back and chestnut hair lay tangled around her shoulders. She didn't look any different, although she wasn't really sure what she'd been expecting to change. Laughing at herself, she washed and got dressed, then made her way to the hall for breakfast.

Seeing that Solona wasn't around, Eve grabbed her breakfast and took a seat. Just as she was finishing her eggs and toast, washed down with copious amounts of coffee, a messenger arrived and told her to go to the First Enchanter's office. Thinking that she'd only dreamed about taking her Harrowing, she choked on the last mouthful of her drink which had unfortunately gone down the wrong way. After numerous back-patting from well-meaning friends and some horrific hacking noises, Eve managed to get the coughing under control.

Turning dazed and watering eyes to the messenger, she managed to rasp, "What did you say?"  
He looked a bit dubious at repeating the message in case it brought on a repeat coughing attack. Speaking slowly as though addressing an idiot, he said. "The First Enchanter would like to see you."

With slow steps, Eve walked to the office and noticed a slight tremor in her hand as she knocked. Irving told her to enter, and she did so. Maker, she really shouldn't have had the eggs, because they weren't sitting well in her stomach. She consoled herself with the thought that if all else failed, she could vomit on the demon.  
"...are now a mage of the Fereldan Circle."  
She blinked and stared at the First Enchanter, her mouth slightly ajar. Irving was holding out a ring and a staff, and the Knight-Commander held her new robes.

Exhilaration flooded her body and she rambled something unintelligible while placing the ring on her finger. There was a knock on the door, and in walked Senior Enchanter Torrin. Eve smiled at one of her favourite teachers; he'd been responsible for instilling in her a love of books. He was also a frequent visitor to the library where he talked with like-minded mages about the various fraternities.

However, that was something Eve had never paid much attention to that. She was where she was, and it seemed easier to accept her role in life. A shiver ran down her spine as she recalled her Harrowing. Definitely better to accept it, she thought, knowing that a desire for what she couldn't have might lead her down a very bad path.

"Congratulations on passing your Harrowing, Eve." She thanked him, took her new staff and robes and followed him out of Irving's office. "I've been asked to show you to your new quarters now that you're a mage," he told her.  
Dodging an oncoming Tranquil who was carrying supplies, Eve caught up to Torrin. "I get new quarters?" The excitement and happiness in her voice were infectious, and Torrin laughed. "Of course, you're a fully fledged mage now," he replied with a cheerful smile.

Eve grinned, thinking that the day just kept getting better and better. Her eyes widened as she looked around the small quarters partitioned between two other quarters. Spreading her arms wide, Eve whirled around, delighted at all the extra space she now had. "This is just amazing!" she enthused.  
Her previous quarters had consisted of the bottom bunk and half a footlocker. A far cry from the large bed, vanity, and wardrobe that now filled her room. It just didn't get any better than this.

After changing into her mage robes, Eve threw her apprentice staff in the corner, grabbed her new one and went in search of Solona. After the robes had been admired, and some spells tested with the staff, Eve excitedly told her about the new room she'd been given. Solona chuckled and hugged Eve. "I hope my Harrowing happens soon because it's going to be lonely in the apprentice quarters without you."

Eve felt guilty as she recalled her happiness. "I'm sure you'll be called soon, and maybe you'll get the quarters next to mine."  
Solona grinned. "Now, that would be fun."  
They went off for lunch, talking merrily about the future and trying to decide how to sneak Solona into Eve's new room. They separated, each needing to attend to their duties, with a promise to meet in the hall for dinner.

At six o'clock Eve arrived back in the hall and looked around for Solona. When she couldn't find her, Eve assumed that her friend had been delayed and went to get her dinner. While she was spooning some vegetables onto her plate, she found herself being addressed by Jowan. Schooling her features into a polite mask, she turned towards him.  
"I thought I should let you know that Solona was taken to her Harrowing twenty minutes ago."

Eve knew Solona's skill as a mage was second to none, but the test wasn't based on the strength of magic, but rather the ability to perceive a demon's temptations. Still, Solona was nobody's fool, and Eve was confident that her friend would pass with flying colours. She then sat down and picked at her food while worrying the whole time.

Jowan sat opposite her, and such was her state of mind that she didn't care. He started talking, but Eve's mind was elsewhere, at least until he let drop a rather pertinent piece of information. "They say Cullen has been chosen to strike the killing blow if she fails."  
Eve's eyes widened in distress as she thought of how he must be feeling. Having to strike down someone he cared about would be nothing short of horrifying. She wondered if the Knight-Commander was aware of Cullen's feelings for Solona, hence why he was making the poor Templar responsible for the task.

Jowan interrupted her thoughts. "He was your would-be executioner, too. I think they're just getting him used to that role."  
Eve's eyebrows rose in surprise. "I didn't know that."  
"He carried you back to your bed when the test was over," Jowan said, unknowingly throwing Eve into a flutter.  
"Bugger," she muttered. "I missed all the good stuff."  
Jowan looked at her in surprise. "You think it's fun being carried around by a Templar?"  
Remembering who she was talking to, she deftly turned aside the question and got them onto a safer subject.

That night, Eve paced by the apprentice quarters, nervously awaiting the return of her friend.  
"You should be in bed, Eve."  
She turned quickly at the sound of Cullen's voice and saw that he was carrying Solona. "I just wanted to make sure she was all right."  
Although he looked tired, Cullen managed a smile. "Fastest Harrowing in the history of the Circle."  
Eve returned the smile, relief at Solona's safe return overriding her usual flustered behaviour when in the presence of her favourite Templar, to the point that she could even wish him a good night without breaking out into a fit of giggling.  
"Goodnight, Eve."  
His deep voice washed over her and she walked into the door frame. Glancing over her shoulder, she was glad to see that Cullen had already entered the apprentice quarters, thereby missing the return of her clumsiness. With a smile on her face, Eve walked to her room, hoping that Solona would be nearby once she'd been assigned her own quarters. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Alone**

As Eve made her way through the corridors, it became apparent that Solona's Harrowing was the talk of the Circle. Various mages and apprentices gathered in little groups whispering about the event.  
"Quickest Harrowing they've ever seen. Well, that's what Cullen says."  
"Well, of course, he'd say that. He's got a crush on her."  
"Yes, but he must have been glad she passed because he'd been chosen to make the killing blow if she failed."  
"She's always been so confident. I just know I'll be sick."

Seeing her friend entering the hall, Eve caught up to her and congratulated her, not only for passing the test but also for becoming famous. Solona laughed, her cheeks flushed as she brushed away the compliment. "I think I just got lucky."  
Eve shook her head. "I think you're just that good."  
"Stop it. If you keep complimenting me, I won't be able to get my head through the doors."

Laughing, they talked about their plans for the day, until Jowan interrupted. Looking more devious than usual, he told Solona that Irving would like to see her, then lowered his voice and asked that she meet him afterwards.

Eve glared at the man; her instincts told her that he was up to no good. She walked down the corridor with Solona, then checking that Jowan had gone, she told her friend, "I hope you don't meet Jowan. He's being more shifty than usual."  
Solona chuckled. "Maker's breath, Eve, always so cautious. Jowan's a friend, so of course, I'm going to meet him."  
With a warm smile, she hugged Eve and told her not to worry, then carried on down the corridor for her chat with Irving.

Eve stopped at the stock room to put in a request for some lyrium powder so that she could stock up on the necessary potions. After this was done, she took another trip to her beloved library to get in some light reading about the school of Spirit magic. Having had time to think about her Harrowing, it had occurred to her that she'd always been rather weak in that particular school, which might explain why she'd failed to spot a demon until the last moment.

Knowing that the library was on the other side of the stock room, she chose to exit via the opposite doorway. In the midst of crossing the corridor, Eve glanced to her left and then froze at the sight of Solona talking to Cullen. A flashback of the two of them in the Fade raced across her mind and she half expected them to kiss. Obviously, that was something he'd never do: Cullen was a Templar through and through and wouldn't break the rules, no matter how much he might want to.

Pushing away the disturbing memory, Eve made her way as quickly as possible to the library. She soon found the book she wanted and settled down for a peaceful day. She was unsure of how much time had passed before the hushed conversation was replaced with an excited chatter.

"I heard that Jowan used blood magic to escape. There are rumours that the Chantry initiate will be sent to Aeonar."  
Eve frowned at the mention of Jowan's name. She really hoped Solona hadn't got involved in any of his crazy schemes.  
"Is it true that Solona was a part of the plot?"  
The frown deepened, but Eve was confident that Solona wouldn't-  
"Oh yes. I heard the Templars talking about it. Apparently, Greagoir is none too happy that she was conscripted into the Grey Wardens," a young apprentice said loudly.  
Shit! Apparently, Solona would.

Eve threw her book onto the windowsill and rushed down the corridor. She had a moment to note the grim look on Cullen's face, but she filed that away for later. Right now, the only thing on her mind was seeing Solona before she left the Circle. She'd heard rumours that a Grey Warden had arrived at the tower last night, but with all the worry about Solona's Harrowing, Eve hadn't paid much attention to the news.

She reached the reception area just as Solona entered. The two friends looked sadly at each other for a moment, then running across the room, Eve pulled Solona into a tight hug. "Please, don't go," she said, tears clogging her throat.  
Solona stroked a hand over her friend's hair. "I'm sorry, but I have to."  
Tears fell freely down Eve's face. "I don't know what I'm going to do without you," she whispered.  
Solona pulled back to look at her friend, her own eyes shining with unshed tears. "You're going to be fine, Eve. You're stronger than you know."  
Leaning forward, she pressed a kiss to Eve's forehead before abruptly turning away to follow the Grey Warden. The door closed and Eve felt a wave of loneliness, unlike anything she'd experienced before.

With slumped shoulders, she walked back to the library, uncaring of the tears that streaked her face. So lost in sadness, she wasn't even aware that she was walking past Cullen until he spoke. "So, she's gone then?"  
Eve lifted large grey eyes and met his gaze; a shadow of sorrow briefly flickered across his face before being hidden away.  
Eve swallowed hard. "Yes, she's gone." Believing she'd found someone who understood her distress, she reached out to him, wanting only to offer comfort and get some in return. However, he pulled away, and through her tears, she saw that his posture was stiff and his once warm brown eyes now cold and hard.

Regretting her actions, she stepped back, wiping a hand across her face. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that." Eve walked quickly away and returned to her seat in the library. Ignoring her book, she turned her gaze to the window in the hope of seeing her friend one last time but to no avail. Curiosity drove many people to her side to find out the story of Solona's sudden departure, but after Eve had consistently refused to answer, they got the hint and left her alone.

As the days flew by, life in the Circle returned to normal. Then, one day during lunch, Greagoir, and Irving walked into the hall and told everyone that the King of Ferelden had died at the battle of Ostagar. Saddened by the news, everyone attended the service held by the Chantry.  
A week later, Wynne and Uldred returned to the Circle. Uldred was quiet about the events, but Wynne spoke of treachery and revealed that Solona had been at Ostagar. Eve's mouth opened, ready to ask for more details, but the Senior Enchanter turned pale blue eyes towards her. "I'm sorry, child, but all the Grey Wardens perished in the battle."

There was a roaring sound in her head and an iciness crept through her veins. "She... she might have survived?" Eve said, fighting back the tears.  
Wynne inclined her head. "She might have."  
But it was plain from the Senior Enchanter's tone that she didn't believe that any more than Eve. The dam broke and tears rolled down Eve's face. Blinded, she stumbled down the corridor until a strong hand pulled her to a halt. "Eve, what's happened?"  
She looked at Cullen, the tears making it impossible to see the concern on his face, and recalling their previous encounter, she pulled away. Sadness tightened her throat making it difficult to speak. "She's..."  
Finding it hard to breathe, she barely managed to gasp out the last word. "Dead."

Saying the word hammered home the reality, and the tears turned into sobs so powerful that she couldn't stand up straight. She was barely aware of his hand on her arm keeping her upright, nor could she make sense of his words as he asked who had died.  
Wynne provided the answer. "Solona."  
"Maker's breath, no!"  
She glanced sympathetically at him, understanding the reason for his distress, then patted his arm. "I'll take care of Eve."  
Clearing his throat, he let go of the distraught mage. "Right. Thank you, Wynne."

When the tears dried up, Wynne told Eve to get some rest and left her in peace. But rest was impossible; memories whirled around her head reminding her of what she'd lost. Eventually, her thoughts turned to Jowan and sorrow turned to anger.

Jowan and his fucking blood magic! This is what happened when you tried to help someone! She raged at him in her thoughts and sometimes aloud. Then the tears returned and, eventually, she cried herself to sleep. Therefore, she wasn't aware of Cullen coming into her quarters to check on her, nor did she see the way his eyes lingered briefly on her face before he returned to his post.

It was almost a week later that word started circulating about two Grey Wardens who had survived Ostagar. Eve prayed that one of them was Solona and that she was in good company. News from the outside world seemed to be getting worse – civil wars and a possible blight, but Eve's concerns were focused on the Circle which seemed to be developing problems of its own.

Rumours had begun circulating that the senior mage, Uldred, wanted to start a rebellion. Eve had rolled her eyes at the ridiculous gossip. She knew that there were some, like Anders, who wanted their freedom, but surely none would be idiotic enough to lead a revolt? She'd dismissed the idea and instead allowed herself a chuckle at the thought of Anders, who had once again escaped the Circle.

However, the next day, Eve was forced to review her outlook on the rumours when she noticed mages gathering in small groups away from the prying eyes of the Templars. Words were no longer accompanied by a friendly smile but instead by a grim mouth and angry eyes. An air of tension crackled throughout Kinloch Hold, tempers were frayed, and more and more it seemed as if the mages were being pulled into opposing factions. Those wanting rebellion on one side, and those wanting peace on the other. And in the middle a few people who just wished that things would return to normal.

But Eve was about to learn that everything changed, and not always for the better.

It was mid-morning and the library was unusually quiet, with most of the mages at a meeting called by Uldred. Eve had decided not to go, opting instead to spend her time reading rather than getting involved with political arguments.

Around two o'clock in the afternoon, the first scream shattered the silence. This was immediately followed by a loud roar and a low, evil laugh. Eve's fingers convulsed nervously around the book she' was holding and the hairs stood up on her arms, accompanied by goosebumps. Her heart sounded unnaturally loud in the eerie stillness that had fallen over the tower.

There was a brief moment when she hoped that whatever had caused the scream had been dealt with, but then they started again and in earnest this time. Blood-curdling and terrifying noises tore through the air, but they were nothing compared to the horrific gurgling that followed because Eve knew that these were the sounds of people dying.


	10. Chapter 10

**Rebellion**

Fear and adrenaline pumped through Eve's veins as she jumped from the window seat and immediately raced out of the library. Soon the screams were all around her, accompanied by the sound of fighting. The scrape and clash of steel came from every room, and in the air hung the thick, oppressive residue of magic. She reached the hall and the torches dimmed and flickered as though sharing her fear, and she saw at once that there was much to be afraid of.

"Get out of my head, witch!"  
A blast of energy knocked the woman back, and while stunned, the Templar surged forward and stabbed the blood mage through the heart.  
Knowing the man's voice, Eve ran towards him. "Adir, are you all right? What's happened?"  
His hand drew back, tightening around the hilt of his sword, ready for an attack, but stopped when he saw Eve. He eyed her warily. "Are you on their side?" He nodded in the direction of the blood mages fighting the Templars.  
Eve vehemently shook her head. "No, of course not."  
Looking weary, he glanced around the room. "Uldred attacked using blood magic and was supported by a group of blood mages. Then to cap his idiocy, he attempted to summon a Pride demon but was overwhelmed and possessed."  
"Maker's breath! Where is Uldred now?"  
"The Harrowing Chamber. We're trying to reach there, but these damnable abominations, mages, and demons are hindering us every step of the way."  
"All right. Tell me what I can do?"  
Adir rubbed a hand over his face. "Not much, just get to safety."

If he'd said that to her while she'd been in the library and still shaken from the screams, she might have taken him at his word. But when she'd entered the hall and looked upon the devastation, there had been a moment where she knew she had a choice: fight or flee. Never one for confrontations, she had almost turned on her heel and ran, but then something had reared up inside of her – courage, determination, or loyalty – she couldn't say for certain. Perhaps it had been all three traits, whatever the case she'd found her reason to fight.  
"No, I stand and fight by the side of the Templars."

Adir smiled. "Do your best to take down the demons, but stay out of the line of fire from Templars. If you get hit by one of our abilities, you'll be as defenceless as the mages we fight."  
She nodded her understanding and moved forward to help out the few mages who had retained enough sanity to stand with the Templars and try and stop the madness that had infected the Circle.

In shock, Eve watched as people she'd once called friends now seemed unrecognisable, warped by their hate and anger. Droplets of blood swirled around in the air making the scene that much more macabre. It was chaos. There was no order to the fighting, just a free for all where people went after the closest enemy while simultaneously trying to keep watch over nearby allies. Eve had stopped thinking, because she knew that if she took just one minute to consider all the death and destruction around her, then she wouldn't have been able to go on.

Tears filled Eve's eyes as she saw the young apprentice, Keili, a dark smile on her face, blood spinning around her like a small tornado as she fought the Templars. It seemed inconceivable to Eve that this young woman, who had been so scared of her own magic, would not only condone but join Uldred's rebellion.

Keili's grin grew and then Torrin screamed. His body twisted and contorted in an agonising and abnormal manner until something cracked. The Senior Enchanter slumped to the floor, and Eve ran to him, hoping that she might be able to help. As soon as she saw his wide-open lifeless eyes, Eve knew she'd made a mistake in going to him. Stumbling back from her dead friend, the first cracks appeared in the emotional wall she'd built around herself, and the terrifying truth started to seep in.

At that moment, she let her guard down and immediately regretted her mistake when hot agony seared her skin. She screamed as a molten hand of fire wrapped around her wrist. The smell of burning flesh filled Eve's nose and panic overrode her common sense so that instead of fighting back, she desperately tried to scrabble away. The demon slithered closer, and then a gleaming blade appeared through its middle, and with a snarl of rage, the demon sank into the stone floor.

An armoured hand reached down to Eve and she clasped it gratefully, thanking the Templar who's face was hidden behind a helmet.  
"Drink this." A cool, glass vial was placed in Eve's hand and deep red liquid sloshed around invitingly. Quickly, she swallowed the health potion and felt relief as the fiery pain eased.  
"Grab the lyrium off Torrin; he won't be needing it anymore."  
Catching a slight inflexion in the muffled voice, Eve turned to look at the Templar again. "Cullen?"  
A nod of the head and then he was moving away, ready to fight another wave of demons and abominations.  
"Andraste, preserve us all," she said. Then, with tears stinging her eyes, she took the three lyrium potions hanging on Torrin's belt and stowed them away before jumping back into the thick of the battle.

Time seemed to pass in a blur as those fighting to save the Circle took down anyone between them and the Harrowing Chamber. Eve reached for a lyrium potion only to find that she'd run out. "Shit!" Exhausted and low on mana, her hands trembled slightly as she stopped to search a nearby corpse.  
"Eve!"  
She glanced up to see Adir running towards her and behind him Cullen, Beval, Farris, and Annlisse. A shiver raced down her spine, and Eve knew someone was behind her. She started to turn, but too late. The bewitched Templar's sword punctured her side, and for a split-second, she stared at the blade protruding from her body, then the sword was quickly withdrawn. A painful breath, sharply exhaled, was cut short as the pommel cracked against her skull.

With her vision wavering and blood pouring from the wound, Eve's knees buckled and she hit the ground. Abominations and demons poured into the corridor and attacked the last remaining Templars. Frantic with the need to help, she tried to rise but that was the final straw for her exhausted and damaged body. As darkness closed in around her she saw the three Templars being overwhelmed and dragged away, Cullen amongst them, and she was powerless to help them... to help him.


	11. Chapter 11

**A Broken Circle**

With a groan, Eve's eyes fluttered open and she took a moment to catalogue the numerous injuries. Slowly, she pulled herself into a standing position, then put out a hand and pressed against the cold wall, steadying herself while she waited until the room had stopped spinning.

As the dizziness cleared, she opened her eyes and surveyed the corridor. Around her were bodies of Templars and mages; burnt, twisted, dismembered, and there, lying in a pool of blood was Adir's corpse. Eve cried out and staggered backwards, hitting the wall and scraping skin as she slid to the floor., The stench of burnt flesh and coppery blood mingled with smoke that stung her nose. Trembling, Eve covered her eyes, blocking out the horrors and hiding the tears that streamed down her face.

In the end, it had been too much, and the tower had been lost to Uldred and his blood mages. Was this the price of freedom? Death and destruction everywhere, friends turned to enemies, or even worse, dead. All they had to show for this rebellion were torn and mangled bodies and a destroyed tower – Kinloch Hold was a broken Circle.

Once the tears had dried up, she realised that her side was no longer hurting. Curious, she undid a few buttons on her robe and pulled it back to reveal healthy skin. She lifted a puzzled eyebrow. Who could have healed her? Perhaps this meant there were survivors. With rising hope, she got to her feet, picked up her staff and began searching the rooms, collecting any health and lyrium potions from the many corpses that littered the floor. She and the survivors would need all the help they could get if they were going to save the captured Templars. However, as Eve worked her way around the third floor, she became more and more despondent at finding only dead bodies.

An unnatural silence seemed to pervade every room, and it stretched her overwrought nerves to the point of breaking. Surely she couldn't be the only one to have survived? That thought did not sit well with her, not one bit, because if that was true, then it meant Cullen was dead.  
Eve wiped angrily at her eyes, forcing back the tears. She wouldn't believe that – couldn't believe that! After everything she'd seen and endured, her present state of mind was fragile, and to accept Cullen's death as the truth would be too much for her to handle.

Knowing there was no chance to save the Templars by herself, she decided to backtrack to the lower floors and continue checking for survivors. If none could be found, then she would have to face Uldred alone. If she couldn't defeat him, then at least she would have died trying.

As Eve traversed the second floor she was startled to see that it was already dark outside. How long had she been unconscious? Her thoughts were put on hold when she noticed a slight movement in her peripheral vision. Turning sharply, a fireball already forming in one hand, she saw Owain sweeping the floor of the stock room.

The fireball was dispersed, and she walked over to him, a feeling of hope blossomed in her chest at finding a survivor. "Have you seen anyone else?"  
He turned cold, unemotional eyes towards her and gave a nod. "Yes, Wynne was here, she was with Solona, and some others I do not know."  
A large smile spread across Eve's face at this news. "Solona is alive? That's wonderful!"  
With Solona and Wynne in the tower then there was a good chance of saving the Circle and the Templars. Eve prayed that Cullen was still alive.

With a sense of urgency and renewed vigour, she said, "I need to find them, where did they go?"  
"I do not know. They said they were going to look for First Enchanter Irving and Niall."  
Eve shook her head, knowing that Irving was not in his office having already checked there. The  
second part of his statement sunk in and she raised a brow. "Why are they looking for Niall?"  
"He has the Litany of Adralla."  
With a nod, she conveyed her understanding; the Litany would be very useful in fighting against blood magic. "I guess I must have just missed them. I'll head to the third floor and see if I can catch up."  
"No."  
Eve turned back to Owain, a little startled by the short statement. "No?"  
"You have not just missed them. They came through here some time ago."

Their conversation was interrupted by the tramp of approaching footsteps. Knowing that Owain had no way of defending himself unless he planned to use the broom as a weapon, Eve told him to move further into the stock room. She grabbed her staff and prepared to fight off the enemies.

As the steps grew louder, a trickle of sweat rolled down her temple and dampened the collar of her robe. While Eve waited, she quickly went through her repertoire of spells and decided that lightning would be good for tackling numerous enemies. While they were stunned, she might at least get in one or two fatal hits. Electricity flickered around the head of Eve's staff and arced over to her open hand. Swallowing hard, she fixed her eyes on the doorway, preparing for an onslaught of demons and abominations, with maybe a few blood mages thrown in for good measure.

So it came as a surprise when she heard a familiar gruff chuckle, followed by an equally familiar softly spoken voice. Eve faltered and, the next moment, Solona and the First Enchanter stepped into the hall. The lightning sputtered and died down with an anti-climactic fizzle.

Eve was so relieved at not having to face more enemies, she was momentarily dumbfounded. Which, she soon realised, was a bad thing because everyone was staring at her with a hostile gleam in their eyes. A warrior with short, dark blonde hair stepped in front of Solona and Irving, his shield raised in a defensive position and his sword drawn back in what could only be considered an aggressive manner. Moving up next to him was a blonde haired rogue, or so she assumed based on his armour and the fact that he was holding two very sharp daggers.

Anger and disappointment flickered across Eve's face as she tried to understand their threatening attitude. The warrior and rogue might not know her, but Solona, Wynne, and Irving knew her well enough!  
"Don't tell me you were part of this, child?"  
Or perhaps, Irving didn't know her at all.  
Eve knew that she couldn't really blame them for being suspicious. Too many mages had rebelled and they had no way of knowing who had remained loyal. However, the wary look in Solona's eyes still hurt.

Being tired, wounded, and enduring the stares of six people with expressions ranging from cautious to downright hostile, Eve found it difficult to get her brain to function. She swallowed in an effort to get some saliva into her dry mouth with the hope that her tongue would start working.

It was then that Eve spotted Cullen standing at the back of the group. Having fought by his side, she couldn't understand why he wasn't saying something. But, as Eve looked into his eyes, she saw that they were haunted, and there was an underlying hint of anger. He looked exhausted and badly hurt, and had plainly been tortured by Uldred.

"Cullen?" The word was forced through cracked lips and Eve suddenly realised how thirsty she was. Just how much time had passed since the start of all this madness? Cullen's brown eyes focused on her – cold, hard, contemptuous – and Eve knew that the young, shy Templar he'd once been was gone for good.  
"What?" His sharp response was painful to hear and she wanted to weep for what he must have suffered.  
"Please, tell them I fought with you and the other Templars against the blood mages."  
All eyes turned to him and he gave a short nod. "She did."

Swords were sheathed and a smile appeared on Solona's face. "I'm glad you made it, Eve."  
With an effort, Eve pushed past the hurt and anger she was feeling. Judging by the look on Solona's face, her friend hadn't had an easy time either. The smile that came to Eve's lips was sincere and warm as she replied, "I was about to say the same to you."

Solona saved the mages that day. Not just by retaking the tower and killing Uldred, but in agreeing with First Enchanter Irving that the danger had passed.


	12. Chapter 12

**A Broken Templar**

As Eve watched a mage go to work on the burnt handprint left by the Rage demon, a thought occurred to her. "Was it you that healed my side?"  
Solona chuckled. "That was Wynne. You were in bad shape, Eve. I wanted to wait until you woke up, but..."  
"But you had a Circle to save," Eve said with a laugh. "I'm just grateful you found me."  
Eve found herself pulled into a hug. "So am I. Maker, but it's good to see you again."  
She awkwardly returned the embrace, having only with one arm free. "And you. I was hoping you would be one of the surviving Grey Wardens."

They pulled apart, Solona rolling her eyes. "Where are my manners? Let me introduce everyone." Pointing to the warrior, she said, "That's Alistair, the other surviving Grey Warden, and the rogue is Zevran." She leaned in closer and whispered, "He's an Antivan Crow."  
Eve felt a little flustered as she shook hands with the handsome men and responded to their pleasantries. They moved away and she grabbed her friend. "Maker's breath, how can you even function with those two around?"  
Solona laughed. "Trust me, it wasn't easy, but I've adjusted."  
Seeing that her friend's gaze was resting on Zevran's backside, she sniggered. "Yes, so I see."  
Solona flushed. "All right, I might need to work on that."  
There was a naughty gleam in Eve's grey eyes as she replied, "I'm sure you will."  
A snort of laughter was surprised from Solona.

Then her gaze landed on Eve's arm. "That's going to leave a scar," she said with a sympathetic wince.  
Eve tried to smile. "I hear men find scars attractive. Wait, no that's wrong. I think it's women who find scars attractive on men. Well, I'm screwed then."  
Zevran leaned over to take a look. "Oh, I don't know. Some men might be intrigued by the scar. It's a great way to break the ice, si?"  
She chuckled, her spirits lifting at the friendly camaraderie. Things would be okay once they'd gotten the Circle back into some kind of order.

Solona sat down on a step next to Eve. "I was wondering if you wanted to join us? You showed courage and loyalty during this mess. I could have a chat with Irving and get permission for you to leave the Circle."  
Eve flushed and shook her head in denial as she thought back to the mages and Templars who had died; they were the courageous ones. She hadn't even been able to save the captured Templars.

She turned back to Solona, who was still waiting for an answer. "I would have loved to travel with you, but..." Eve's gaze drifted over to Cullen who was seated on a bench while his injuries were being treated. It was obvious, however, that his worst wounds were those that couldn't be seen. "But the Circle will need a lot of work done, and I want to see it restored."

Following the direction of Eve's eyes, Solona smiled sadly, fully aware of Eve's real reason for staying. "I understand. I have a feeling you're destined for great things, Eve, but maybe this isn't your time."  
Eve blushed, and said with a laugh, "I think you've got me mixed up with yourself."  
Solona's cheeks were equally flushed as they said a poignant goodbye. After a few words with Irving, she left Kinloch Hold, taking Wynne with her.

With Solona's buoyant presence gone, Eve was left alone with her thoughts. It had come as a shock to learn that she'd been locked in the tower for two days. With growing horror, she realised that meant Cullen had been tortured for the majority of that time. Maker's breath, how had he lasted so long?

She looked over at him and felt tears sting her eyes. His chin rested on his chest and he neither flinched nor made a sound as his wounds were tended. Unsure of what she was going to do, Eve found herself standing in front of Cullen. "I never got a chance to thank you for saving my life," she said with a small smile.  
There was no answering curl of his lips, though. Instead, his cold eyes met hers and he snorted with disgust. "Out of everyone I could have saved, it had to be a mage!"  
Eve swallowed hard, knowing that she'd made a mistake, and quickly tried to extricate herself from the conversation. "I... I just wanted to say thanks and tell you how sorry I am for the friends you lost."  
Fury filled his gaze. "Don't talk to me about what I lost, mage."  
The last word was spat at Eve, and she felt an answering flame of anger as she thought of Adir and Torrin. "You weren't the only one to lose friends, Cullen."  
His lips did curl this time but with an angry sneer rather than a smile. "Yes, I saw some of your friends. Weren't they the ones trying to kill us?!"  
She was about to hotly refute that accusation when an image of Keili rose to mind, blood circling her, the dark grin stretching her lips as she killed Torrin. "I'm sorry," Eve whispered. But even as the words left her mouth, she knew how inadequate they sounded.

It was becoming increasingly difficult to hold back the memories, and Eve stumbled away from him as the first tears blurred her eyes. Wanting somewhere quiet where she could come to terms with all that she'd lost, she made her way to the library. The first tears spilt down her face as she stepped around corpses of people she'd once called a friend. Eventually, she reached her window seat, glad of the partition that hid the worst of the carnage from her sight.

Eve rested her head against the cool glass and looked out over the lake, watching ribbons of silver, cast by the large moon, dance across the choppy water. She fought to keep her mind blank, but the memories soon forced themselves to the surface, and knowing that she was fighting a losing battle, she gave into them.  
Eyes closed, her head resting against the window, Eve let down the wall she'd held in place ever since the attack began. As it crumbled, the feelings she'd been unable to deal with during the battle now came crashing down on her.

How had this been allowed to happen? Why hadn't the Templars been able to stop it? But the question that pushed her over the edge was why had Knight-Commander Greagoir locked them inside? If he'd led the rest of the Templars into the battle then they might not have suffered so many losses, and Cullen wouldn't have had to endure two days of torture.

Her sorrow was now mixed with rage at what she felt was nothing less than a betrayal. Unthinking, she slammed her clenched fist against the wall. Sharp agony ricocheted through her hand and she was fairly certain that she'd just cracked a bone. However, the pain was enough to cut through Eve's anger and bring her back to her senses. Pulling her knees up, she dropped her head forward to rest on them and finally allowed the grief an outlet in the sobs that wracked her body.

She was drifting between the waking world and the land of sleep when she felt someone lifting her. A momentary shot of fear made her struggle, but strong arms held her, and a voice she knew as well as her own said, "It's all right, Eve, you're safe."  
Although her eyes were heavy with exhaustion, she managed to open them a little and looked at Cullen. "Are you still angry with me?" she asked quietly. There was a brief silence and, unable to hold them open any longer, Eve's eyes closed.  
"No, not with you."  
Feeling as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders, she smiled drowsily and murmured her thanks.

As sleep drew closer, she heard Irving's gruff voice. "Where did you find her?"  
"She was in her seat by the window."  
Irving chuckled and the sound receded as he walked away. Eve was barely awake when Cullen placed her in bed, but she felt his fingers brush back a strand of her hair as he whispered, "I'm sorry, too." And then he was gone.


	13. Chapter 13

**Understanding**

The morning brought little comfort to the survivors of Uldred's rebellion. In the stark light of day, no longer dulled by the darkness of night, the atrocities seemed that much more horrific.

Expecting to see only a handful of mages in the dining hall, Eve was surprised by the number of those who had survived.  
While eating her breakfast, she listened to the murmured conversations of how they'd managed to stay alive. Some had hidden in wardrobes, others had locked themselves in the storage rooms, or had just been lucky enough to get overlooked.

She felt a surge of contempt for these cowards; not the tranquil, nor the young apprentices, but the mages who were able to fight, and there were many of them. They should have been ready to defend their home but had instead left others to do the fighting while they cowered in some cupboard. Abruptly, she stood, her chair scraping along the stone floor, silencing the chatter. There was no way she could hide the disgust that she felt, and she was glad to see that some mages turned away, ashamed of their lack of action. Without a word, for there were too many to be said, Eve grabbed her coffee and strode away.

Knowing that Cullen was the only one who could understand her anger, she went looking for him. It seemed unlikely that he'd want to talk to her but perhaps just being near someone who had fought for the Circle might help calm her temper. However, after searching the first and second floor, she'd been unable to find him.

Eve spent the next couple of days worrying about him until she overheard two Templars talking; Cullen had been given some leave in order to work past his anger, which wasn't just aimed at the mages, but also at the Knight-Commander and the Templars who had waited in safety behind the locked doors. Fists clenched as her own anger rose at the reminder, then breathing slowly through her nose, she walked away, wishing with all her heart that Cullen would come back soon.

Over the days that passed, everyone worked hard cleaning away bloodstains, replacing or repairing broken furniture where possible, and fixing whatever damage had been done to the tower itself. In between these arduous tasks, there were funerals to attend. Adir and Torrin's had been the most difficult for Eve. She thought she was doing well in working through the anger until she was told that they were holding a funeral for Keili and the other blood mages who had sided with Uldred.

There was no way she would attend that service and so she retreated to the library. A few hours later, Knight-Commander Greagoir walked in and announced it was time for everyone to head to the hall for the funeral. She stayed where she was. Greagoir strode towards her. "Your presence is required, mage."  
"No."  
A frown darkened his face. "What did you say?"  
Eve raised cool grey eyes. "I said, no! I will not pay my respects to murderers."  
"We have no proof that these people were involved with Uldred."  
She stood up then, anger burning her very soul. "No? Have you forgotten that I was there? I watched Keili kill Torrin. I saw those damned blood-mages slaughtering anyone who stood in their way!"  
She took a step towards the Knight-Commander, fists clenched, eyes narrowed. "You would have known that too if you hadn't been so busy keeping yourself safe!"  
"That is enough, mage! You don't understand-"  
"No," Eve cut in. "You're right, I don't understand how you could leave mages and Templars locked inside a tower with abominations and demons running loose. I don't understand how you could fucking betray us like that!" Her chest heaved with sorrow and anger as she brought her tirade to an end.  
"If not for your past, I would send you to isolation."  
She bared her teeth. "Do it! I'm no longer a child, and I would rather be away from everyone. The stench of cowardice is overwhelming."  
Fury lit his eyes as he gestured for a Templar. "Take her away. Two weeks in isolation."  
She readily followed the Templar, leaving the Knight-Commander with some parting words. "Fuck you, Greagoir!"

However, as she descended to the lower levels and saw the small cells, her courage deserted her. She clenched her fists to hide the trembling and bit through her lip as she fought back a wave of nausea. The cell door was swung open, the squeaking of rusty hinges sounded unnaturally loud. Oh Maker, she couldn't do this, not again! She'd taken one step forward when a messenger came walking towards them and handed a note to the Templar.

After reading it, he pulled Eve back and shut the cell door and escorted her to a private chamber on the fourth floor.  
"Your two weeks in isolation will be spent here."  
Eve looked around the spacious bedroom, noting the large window that looked out over the lake, and the well-stocked bookcase. "I don't understand."  
The Templar walked to the door, saying, "You're lucky that the Knight-Commander has more sense than you, mage."

At the end of two weeks, Knight-Lieutenant Carroll released her from the cell with a message to go and see the First Enchanter. Without a word, she walked to his office, uncaring of the cold eyes that followed her progress. Apparently, her words to Greagoir had been repeated, and it seemed all the remaining mages and Templars were none too pleased with her comments.

At his door, she knocked and waited. "Come in."  
The familiar scent of Irving's office failed to relax her this time. She stood before his desk, but he gestured to a chair. "Have a seat, Eve. How are you?"  
She was in no mood for pleasantries, so her reply was curt. "I'm well enough."

Leaning forward, he rested his elbows on the desk. "Eve, you can't blame Greagoir for barring the doors that day."  
"I can, quite easily it seems."  
"Now, child, be reasonable. Do you really think the small handful of Templars he held back would have made that much difference to the fight?"  
"I guess we'll never know."  
"Eve..."

She looked into eyes that seemed wearier than usual. "What do you want me to say, First Enchanter? I can't dismiss the deaths of those who died fighting to save the Circle, and I can't forget that was something that Greagoir should have been doing!"

With a sigh, he leaned back in his chair. "You can't keep this up. This is your home, Eve, but you're alienating everyone with your suspicious glares and harsh words. You need to find a way to get past this anger."  
She was silent for a moment, pondering his words, but then she shook her head. "I don't know how to. Can I go now?"  
He gave a nod, and Eve left, the resentment still simmering inside.

Her footsteps echoed loudly as she walked along the corridors. The place was as silent as a tomb and fear twisted around her heart at the possibility that she was the only survivor.

"Help me, somebody please help me."  
Eve turned quickly towards the scared voice and found herself staring into a small, pitch black room. "Hello, is someone there?"  
"Help me."  
Taking a step forward, she saw a hand reaching out of the darkness towards her. Wanting only to help, she clasped the hand and then found herself being dragged forward. Panicked, she struggled to free herself, but cold fingers dug into her skin. The stench of blood filled the air, and then a face loomed out of the blackness. Horrified, Eve saw that it was Keili; an evil grin twisted her mouth and blood trickled from her eyes.

"Save me." The words hissed from between torn lips, and then the blood mage's skin seemed to bubble and melt until only a skull remained, its jaw open in an eternal scream

Gasping for breath, her face wet with tears, Eve quickly sat up and pushed back the covers that seemed to smother her. With a trembling hand, she rubbed her eyes, hoping to clear away the remnants of the nightmare. Knowing that sleep would be impossible, she climbed out of bed, wrapped a shawl around her shoulders and walked in the direction of the library.

As she passed the Chantry, she heard a low murmuring. Curious, she quietly pushed the door open. Inside, kneeling in front of the statue of Andraste, was the Knight-Commander.

"I cannot see the path.  
Perhaps there is only the abyss.  
Trembling, I step forward,  
In darkness enveloped."

The reverence with which he spoke the Canticle of Trials drew Eve further into the room. Silently, she watched, as with his head bowed, he continued to pray.  
"I am not alone.  
Even as I stumble on the path.  
With my eyes closed, yet I see  
The Light is here."

"Draw..." There was a break in his voice and in that moment, she understood that he carried the weight of each death on his shoulders. In a hushed voice, she spoke the verse that caused him so much pain. "Draw your last breath, my friends."

Greagoir turned quickly, startled by her presence. They looked at each other for a moment, and a wealth of understanding passed between them. This time, when she began to the recite the verse, he joined her.

"Cross the Veil and the Fade and all the stars in the sky.  
Rest at the Maker's right hand,  
And be forgiven."

Taking a deep breath, she met his eyes. "I'm sorry for what I said. I know now that the decision you made was a difficult one."  
"Thank you. But you're not convinced it was the right one?"  
With a sad smile, she replied, "I think the wound is still too raw for me to admit that."  
"I understand."

Eve turned to leave, but Greagoir said, "If it would help to talk, then I'm willing to listen."  
Recalling the nightmare, she was less than eager to return to her bed, and so she accepted his offer. The two sat down on one of the pews and talked until dawn. As the sun's first rays streamed through the windows, Eve felt lighter than she had in a long time. The anger and bitterness she'd been holding onto had slowly disappeared as she'd discussed that awful day with Greagoir.

At the Knight-Commander's insistence, she'd returned to her quarters for some much needed rest, and this time her sleep was undisturbed by nightmares.


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello and Goodbye**

Eve woke before midday feeling refreshed. After washing and dressing, she made her way to the dining hall. Unsurprisingly, she found herself alone and pulled out a book to read while she ate. Shortly afterwards, Eve's reading was interrupted by a female voice. "Do you mind if we sit here?"  
Surprised she looked up to see Petra and Kinnon smiling and waiting for her reply. Wary of their intentions, she gave a nod. "Of course, although I'm sure you're aware that I'm something of a pariah at the moment."  
Kinnon chuckled. "We know, but your sentiments are understandable. Though perhaps your way of expressing them could have been tempered slightly."  
The corner of Eve's mouth turned up in a smile. "That's probably the understatement of the year."

After that, no more was said of the rebellion, Petra neatly changing the subject onto books. This kept the three chatting for the remainder of their lunch break. As Eve rose from the table, she glanced at the two mages. "My thanks."  
Petra smiled. "Any time. Will we see you at dinner?"  
"I believe you will." With a smile, she grabbed her book and went about her duties.

Two days later, thanks to the example set by Petra and Kinnon, there were very few glares or snide comments being thrown her way. Eve was still fighting to overcome her feelings of suspicions; there were times when she'd catch herself watching a mage, wondering if that person had fought with Uldred. Were they planning something, practising blood magic? She knew it would take some time before she could overcome these feelings, but, in the meantime, she tried not to give into them.

It was after breakfast while washing the windows that Eve heard Cullen's voice. Surprise and happiness made her turn quickly, but in her excitement, she failed to take note of the bucket of warm, soapy water near her elbow. Her sleeve snagged on the handle and the whole lot tipped over, thoroughly soaking her robe.

There were a few snorts of laughter and the occasional eye roll from those who knew why Eve had suddenly turned into a bumbling mess.  
"Shit!" Kneeling down, she started mopping up the spilt water, cursing her clumsiness. Once finished, she turned to head to her quarters in order to change out of her wet robe, which had become chilly now that the warm water had cooled.

"Where are you going, mage?"  
She knew the voice belonged to Cullen, but surely that couldn't have been him speaking in such a cold tone? Slowly, she turned and saw him standing there, arms crossed as he waited for a reply.

Obviously, the break had done him the world of good, she thought sarcastically. Pointing to her robe, she said, "I need to get changed."  
"I see. You'll be accompanied by a Templar."  
Both brows were raised in obvious astonishment. "For what purpose?"  
His once warm brown eyes were as hard as flint. "All mages will be kept under strict watch from now on. We will not have a repeat of the... incident." His words were as sharp as a dagger, but she heard the slight break in his voice and knew that his stone-cold demeanour was a mask to hide his fear.  
A thought occurred to her. "Er, does he have to watch while I get changed?" She could feel a blush spreading across her face.  
His own cheeks reddened slightly as he replied, "No, of course not." With a sigh, he rubbed the bridge of his nose as if fighting off a headache. "Just go."  
Eve nodded, a small smile on her lips as she turned away. It was good to see that some of the old Cullen still remained. There was hope for him yet.

However, as days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, the small hope she'd felt back then had slowly withered and died. Cullen became more and more resentful towards the mages and Templars who had survived that fateful day. Remembering her talk with Greagoir, she'd suggested to Cullen that he might benefit from doing the same thing. His harsh reply had dissuaded her from bringing up the subject again.

When the armies were called together to fight the Blight, Eve prepared to leave with her fellow mages, determined to help Solona in some small way. As she strode down the corridor towards the reception area she couldn't help but look for Cullen, wanting to see him again just in case it was the last time. Eve turned a corner and her stomach fluttered as he came into view. When she drew abreast of Cullen, she glanced at him, a small smile on her lips, and was surprised to see a flicker of concern in his golden-brown eyes. "Stay safe, Eve."  
Flustered by his kind words, she stumbled but managed to stay upright. Looking over her shoulder, she replied, "I will." Then she was marching off to war.

The mages provided support for a number of troops, and they returned from the battle relatively unscathed minus one mage who had gotten too close to an ogre. Irving had fought with Solona on the top of Fort Drakon and was, therefore, able to report back that both Grey Wardens had survived the ordeal.

Eve was gratified to receive an invitation to the celebration. She barely recognised Alistair now that he was the King, and felt overwhelmed when he stopped to have a chat with her. Upon hearing Solona being proclaimed the Hero of Ferelden, Eve had become a little emotional. However, her happiness had been diminished somewhat by the news that Solona was going to be travelling for a while with her lover, Zevran. The two friends promised to stay in touch via letters.

 _Dragon 9:31_

Life in the Circle had returned to normal, and, for the most part, Eve's nightmares had subsided. However, one night, just over a year after Uldred's failed rebellion, Eve found herself unable to sleep, and after much tossing and turning, she decided a visit to the library was in order. After untangling herself from the blankets, she climbed out of the bed. Sliding her feet into a pair of soft slippers, Eve grabbed a shawl and made her way to the library.

The hallway was empty except for a Templar who inclined his head for her to continue; one mage wasn't seen as a threat. She stepped into the library and breathed in the comforting aroma of books. But this time there was another scent mixed in, faint but lingering. She couldn't quite place it, but there was definitely a masculine quality to it. Barely breathing, Eve moved forward, her soft-soled slippers making no noise on the thick carpet. The moon shone fully through the window - her window - right onto the face of Cullen. One arm leaned against the wall upon which his forehead rested, his other hand lay on her window seat as he gazed out into the night.

Eve knew she should walk away, but it was impossible to tear her gaze away from him. And so, she leaned against the closest bookcase, hidden in the shadows, intent on memorising his face. Maker's balls, she thought, I'm turning into a stalker. Eventually, her eyelids drooped and she deemed it time to return to bed. Quietly, Eve turned towards the corridor so as not to disturb Cullen, but he stopped her. "Wait."

Crap! She wondered if he'd known of her presence from the start? His footsteps drew closer and Eve turned to face the music. In his frame of mind, she doubted he'd be as lenient as the Templar she'd passed in the corridor.  
"I couldn't sleep," she offered as an explanation. Of course, that didn't cover why she'd been standing there watching him. Oh Maker, now he'd think she was creepy as well as a bumbling idiot. His next words showed that it didn't really matter anymore.  
"I'm leaving Ferelden. I'll be travelling to Kirkwall in the morning."

Eve's breath hitched in her throat and her body fluctuated between hot and cold. It had never occurred to her that he'd transfer to another Circle. She gripped her hands tightly together to hide the slight tremor as another wave of iciness washed over her. His words had cut deeper than the sword that had pierced her side.

"Why are you telling me this?" she asked, feeling mystified by his sudden desire to talk. He looked away from her when he replied, "Because I see the same suffering in you. This place... we can't be in this place after what happened. Even if you've managed to accept the fact that they left us locked in here with... with everything, being here is only going to be a constant painful reminder of those we lost." He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. "You might want to think of moving to another Circle, that's all I'm saying."  
"Kirkwall?" she suggested with a smile. It was only half a joke. Eve would have had her bags packed in an instant if he'd agreed.  
But he shook his head. "No, I need to leave everything from this place behind." He moved towards the corridor, then without looking back, said, "Goodnight, Eve, and good luck for the future."  
"Thank you. I wish you the same, Cullen." Her voice broke slightly but she managed to complete the sentence. His head inclined, confirming he'd heard her, and then he walked away. For good this time.

A choked sob fell from Eve's lips as she moved to her window seat. His scent still lingered there, and, for a moment, she thought she could feel the warmth where his hand had rested. Wishful thinking probably, but it was all she had left.

Another sob tore free, and she clapped a hand over her mouth to muffle the sounds. If she was being honest with herself, she wasn't sure how she was going to cope without him. She'd tried to overcome her anger in the hope that Cullen could see that there was a way to move past that horrible day. Obviously, her plan had worked out perfectly.

Eve snorted at her sarcastic mind and for a while the tears flowed freely, stopping only when she found herself distracted by a sudden thought: how had he known she was there? Contrary to her usual clumsy behaviour around him, she'd managed to stay silent the whole time. It was a mystery, but one that she was too tired to solve. Besides, it hardly seemed to matter now.

Cullen stopped, his hands clenched as the sound of her crying reached him. He turned on his heel and took two steps back towards the library before common sense reinserted itself. With a muttered oath, he turned and walked away before he did something stupid.


	15. Chapter 15

**A Fresh Start**

When Eve woke up the next morning, Cullen had already left Kinloch Hold, and she knew there was nothing left for her there. After breakfast, she went to see the First Enchanter and found him sat at his desk. He looked older, although considering the year they'd had that was hardly surprising.

Eve told him about her wish to leave the Circle of Ferelden. With a sad smile, he said, "I'd hoped it was getting better for you."  
"It has, but this place holds too many painful memories."  
"I understand. Thank you for staying around and helping rebuild the Circle."  
Eve smiled and left the office to await word of her transfer. It came through a week later.

The colour drained from her face when she heard where she was being sent to. "Ostwick? Does it have to be there?"  
His face held a sympathetic expression. "Ah, I'm sorry, child. But they were the only Circle who had a space available. If it's any consolation, the odds of you meeting your family on the journey are very slim."  
Eve managed a chuckle. "That's true, and even if we did meet, they wouldn't acknowledge me."

She stood up and held out her hand to Irving. As he clasped it, a wealth of memories surfaced and she remembered his warm hand enveloping hers when she'd first arrived at the tower. Throughout the years, he'd been a mentor and a good friend. Tears spilt over, and seeing them, Irving pulled her into a hug.  
"Take care of yourself, Eve. I know you will do great things with your life."  
With a watery sniffle, she said, "Thank you for everything, Irving."

The next day, Eve went down to the docks and found Kester waiting. He smiled, "I'm sorry to see you go, young'un, but I'm not surprised. Sometimes you just need to start anew."  
"Yeah, I just hope I'm not jumping from the frying pan into the fire."  
"I think you'll be fine. I hear the Ostwick Circle is very pleasant."  
The conversation was brought to a halt when Knight-Lieutenant Bran arrived. "I'll be your escort for the journey. Are you ready, Eve?"  
"As ready as I'll ever be." She climbed into the boat and took her last look at Kinloch Hold.

Two weeks later, Eve arrived in Ostwick and was met by two Templars who introduced themselves as Knight-Lieutenants' Cade and Redler. They led her to the mounts and she stared at the large chestnut horse with consternation.  
"I've never ridden a horse before."  
Cade stepped forward. "Nothing to it, just sit up straight, grip with your knees, and don't pull too hard on the reins."  
With that said, he cupped his hands. She stared at them. "What are you doing?"  
"I'm waiting for you to put your foot in there so I can boost you onto your horse."  
She glanced down at her robes. "Isn't this going to be a bit awkward?"  
"Well, sit side saddle."  
"But then how will I grip with my knees?"  
Seeing that his friend was nearing the end of his patience, Redler decided to get involved. "Look, you get on the horse and we'll lead you."

With a nervous gulp, she put her foot into Cade's hands. "Unless you want to ride facing the horse's ass, I suggest you change to your other foot."  
"Oh, right." Flushed with embarrassment she swapped over and then found herself being flung onto the back of the horse. To her relief, the animal accepted her with seeming docility. After following Redler's instructions, she managed to get one leg hooked over the pommel and her other foot was placed in the stirrup.

All right, this wasn't so bad, she thought, surveying the docks from her elevated position. Cade showed her how to hold the reins, and while she waited for them to mount up, she leaned over the horse and patted his neck. "You're a good boy, aren't-"  
Before she could finish the sentence there was a loud crash from behind her and the horse gave a startled whinny and took off at a gallop.

Cade had glanced in the direction of the noise but seeing that it was only a crate that had fallen from its ropes while being loaded onto a ship, he faced forward just in time to see Eve and her horse bolting down the street. "I thought she said she couldn't ride?"  
Redler laughed. "I don't think she can if her screams are anything to go by."  
"I told you that horse was skittish."  
With a nod, Redler agreed. "Yep, well, I guess we'd better go and catch her before she falls off."

It was some two hours later, when Eve, feeling bruised and battered from her unexpected gallop, arrived at Ostwick Circle. She took a moment to try and discern what type of place she would be living in for the rest of her life, but in the darkness could only make out the general shape of a large building. Then the double doors were pulled open and Eve was ushered inside.

Walking into a brightly lit reception hall, she was cheered by the sight of a log fire which gave off a warm and welcoming glow. The rattle of armour as the Templars led her across the hall sounded extremely loud in the silence, and Eve wondered just how late it was as it seemed everyone was in bed.

"Come on, the First Enchanter wants to meet you," Cade said. With one more look at the cheerful hall, she followed them into a dimly lit corridor.  
A feeling of anxiety swamped her as she wondered whether she'd made a big mistake in leaving Ferelden. She thought of that old adage – the grass is always greener on the other side – and wondered if it was too late to change her mind. She was in the midst of visualising a plan that involved her jumping out the window, hopping onto the horse and hightailing it back to the docks when she realised they'd come to a halt.

Redler knocked on the door, and, a moment later, a young man in robes answered, "Thank you, I can take it from here." The Templars left and the man turned his gaze on Eve. "You must be the new arrival. My name's Tarrick. Come in, we've been expecting you."

The words were accompanied by a smile, but they still sounded ominous to Eve, who by this time was feeling extremely nervous and slightly paranoid. Entering the room, her nerves gave way to confusion. She was certain that Irving had told her the First Enchanter at Ostwick was a female, and besides, Tarrick didn't even look old enough to shave, never mind reaching the position of First Enchanter.

Eve followed Tarrick and realised she was in an antechamber and that there was another door leading from it. Tarrick knocked, and a female voice told him to enter. He pushed the door open, saying, "The new arrival is here, First Enchanter." He gestured Eve forward and closed the door behind her. She found herself being eyed up in what was clearly an assessing manner by a pair of dark brown eyes. First Enchanter Masserick appeared to be an unremarkable woman in her late fifties until she spoke, then you couldn't help but sit up and take notice. Her voice was low and melodic but carried a distinct authoritative note.

For some reason, it had a calming effect on Eve, and she felt the tension melt from her shoulders. Masserick invited Eve to take a seat, then turned her attention to the file on her desk, tucking a lock of white hair behind her ear. Every now and then, she would glance up at Eve, her eyes either surprised or speculative depending on the content she was reading. Eventually, she closed the file with a slap as though a decision had been reached with that action.

"So, judging by your family name you were born a noble." A flicker of the old anger flared up within Eve at the mention of her family, but on the surface, she showed a polite face to her new First Enchanter and quietly confirmed the statement.  
"I see that the thought of your family does not sit well with you. Don't worry, it will be kept confidential, and I see no reason why it should ever be mentioned again."

Eve's grey eyes widened in surprise. How in the Maker's name had the woman known that? Eve decided the woman could pass as a bard with her skills of observation and her lovely voice. Masserick chuckled at the look on Eve's face and then stood. "Welcome to the Circle of Ostwick, Eve. I hope you'll settle in quickly."

In the midst of trying to thank the First Enchanter, Eve rudely interrupted herself with a large yawn that seemed to go on for an age. She rubbed a hand over her face. "I apologise, I'm a little tired."  
Masserick's light laugh eased her embarrassment. "My dear girl, I should apologise for keeping you here after the long journey you've had. Would you like some dinner, or just a bed?"  
Eve's eyes lit up at the last word. "Bed, please."  
Rising from the desk, Masserick walked around and linked their arms together. Warmed by the gesture, Eve had a feeling she was going to like her new home.


	16. Chapter 16

**Everything Changes**

A few months after her arrival, Eve received a letter from Solona, which Irving had kindly forwarded on. After Solona's defeat of the Fifth Blight, she'd been made the Warden-Commander, and had taken on the task of restoring Amaranthine. In her letter, she wrote that she'd invoked the right of conscription and recruited Anders into the Grey Wardens. She pointed out that it had been the only way to stop him being taken into custody by the Templars.

Eve had written back a long letter explaining that she'd moved to a different Circle, and then filled two more pages describing the circumstances leading up to the move. After that, she and Solona became regular correspondents, with the occasional message thrown in from Anders.

About a year later, Eve noticed that there were no longer messages from Anders being included in the letters and she questioned Solona about it. Her friend's reply was couched in such terms that Eve couldn't miss the annoyance. In the missive, Solona explained that Anders had left the Grey Wardens without even a goodbye and that most of those she'd originally recruited had buggered off. Eve had chuckled over this, thinking that Anders just couldn't bear to be tied down to an organisation, whether it be the Circle of the Wardens.

Eve had exceeded First Enchanter Masserick's expectations and settled in very quickly. This was due in no small part to the friendly and laid-back nature of Ostwick Circle and the mages that lived there. And the Templars were... well, they were Templars. In Eve's mind, none would ever reach the standard set by her Templar, which might explain why no one special had entered her life. Some of her friends joked that she would have been better suited to a life as a cloistered sister because she definitely had the celibacy situation well in hand.

It seemed that no matter how much time passed, Cullen was always in her thoughts or dreams. The dreams were the worst; some of them left her aching below, and others left her in tears. Neither outcome was great. However, despite these occasional setbacks, Eve didn't sit around pining for him, life was too short to waste her time waiting for an impossible dream to come true.

And then it was 9:37 and everything changed again.

When news reached the Circle that the Kirkwall Chantry had been blown up, Eve's heart skipped a beat, and the cup of coffee she'd been holding, dropped from suddenly nerveless fingers. Her hands shook while she listened to the details, waiting for Cullen's name to be mentioned.

The Grand Cleric dead at the hands of a mage. The Circle annulled. Hundreds dead. No, thousands dead! The city in flames!

Facts mingled easily with gossip making it hard to define the real story, but there was no mention of Cullen. A few days passed as she agonised over his fate while waiting for more news. It came in the form of two Ostwick Templars who had passed through Kirkwall.

It was said that the Champion of Kirkwall was responsible for the whole thing. Others believed that it was all due to Anders. Vehemently, Eve had denied that accusation, knowing that the cheerful Anders would never do any such thing. But, in the end, she'd been left in no doubt as to his guilt. It still seemed inconceivable to her, and she wondered how the friendly man she'd once known could have carried out such a horrifying act. Someone asked what had happened to the apostate, and they said he'd been killed. Tears sprung to her eyes and she hastily wiped them away, preferring to grieve in private. She would have run to her room there and then, but still, she waited, hoping to hear news about her Templar.

There were those who placed the blame squarely on the shoulders of Knight-Commander Meredith, who apparently was now nothing more than a glowing red statue in the Gallows courtyard. Really, where did people get these stories from? She sighed and massaged her temples to ease a growing headache; it seemed unlikely that she was going to hear anything about Cullen amidst all these rumours. Unable to wait any longer, she asked who was in charge of the Templars now that Meredith was dead.

The Knight-Commander answered, having just entered the room in time to hear the question. "I've been advised that Knight-Captain Cullen will assume that role until order can be brought to Kirkwall."

With these words, a weight lifted from her shoulders and she gripped her trembling hands together in an effort to hide her reaction but could do little to quench the light flush that spread across her cheeks. Realising the Knight-Commander was still talking, she turned her attention back to him. "...and chaos reigns. Knight-Captain Cullen has sent requests to the Circles in the Free Marches asking them to send as many Templars as can be spared. We will, of course, offer any aid we can during this turbulent time."

Eve wondered whether it was worth asking if they needed any help from a mage, but thought better of it considering they'd just killed most of their mages.

After the initial ghoulish excitement had died down, fear started to seep into the minds of mages and Templars. Kirkwall was but the beginning, that much was obvious to everyone. Over the months that followed, more tales poured out of the damaged city. There were rumours of an Exalted March to Kirkwall, which had resulted in the Champion leaving his post as Viscount and disappearing in order to save the city from any further bloodshed.

Later, a book was released by a dwarf named Varric Tethras, apparently a close friend of Garrett Hawke. Everyone wanted to read it. The book was sneaked in, read, and then passed on to the next person. When Eve finally got her hands on the dog-eared copy, she was shocked to discover that Meredith really had been turned into a statue. Well! Who knew that was even possible?

Then the book was forgotten as more frightening stories poured out from everywhere. Circles rebelling, mages loudly demanding their independence, Templars responding with brute force.  
Ostwick Circle sat on the fence of neutrality, siding with neither the mages or the Templars, but that didn't stop individuals within the Circle from stating their own opinions. And, so the fear and tension grew between mages and Templars throughout Thedas. The storm that had been brewing for years was finally here, or so she thought.

 _Dragon 9:40_

In fact, the storm broke over Thedas three years later, and nothing would ever be the same again. The White Spire Circle had rebelled, and the mages had fled to Andoral. A month later, the Divine once again offered the mages the chance to vote: choose independence, or rejoin the Chantry and return to the Circles. It was a slim margin, but independence won. All the Circles rose up and those mages that managed to escape joined the others in Andoral.

Eve could understand why mages had voted for independence, for although she'd been lucky with the Templars who'd watched over her, she knew many stories of those who hadn't been so fortunate. Kirkwall was a prime example; although, in fairness to the Templars, there had been an uncommonly large amount of blood mages active in that city.

Yet, it could be argued that the blood magic was only used in desperation as the grip of Knight-Commander Meredith tightened. Still, after what Eve had seen in the Fereldan Circle, she couldn't agree with blood magic, knowing first-hand the damage it could cause.

With the vote cast, Lord Seeker Lambert had declared the Nevarran Accord null and void. Both the Circle of Magi and the Templar Order were no longer answerable to the Chantry. It was madness and chaos all over again, just like Kinloch Hold, but magnified in ferocity and fear, and affecting the whole world.

In light of this, the situation at Ostwick escalated quickly. As soon as the Circle had been dissolved, mages demanded their freedom. For the most part, at least. There were those, of course, that wanted peace and for things to return to the way they'd always been. A fruitless wish. The world was changing, and everyone was being swept along with the tide, whether they wanted to or not. As the mages at Ostwick Circle demanded freedom, the Templars responded with violence.

The outcome was inevitable. The resulting fight was violent and painful, as once more, those she had considered friends now stood in opposition. Eve chose freedom, acknowledging the irony considering she'd fought to save the Fereldan Circle. However, Eve could see no reason for trying to save the Circle – it was already gone. When the fight had ended neither side could be said to have emerged victorious, they had all lost too many friends for it to be considered anything but a waste of lives.

Those wanting their freedom left, and under First Enchanter Masserick's guidance, it was decided that they would head to the conclave in Ferelden to see if the situation could be resolved. Masserick patted Eve on the shoulder. "You will be our delegate, my dear."  
Eve looked at her with suspicious eyes. "Now why would you choose me? You're our First Enchanter. Surely the role should be yours?"  
She chuckled. "True, but then you are of a noble house, and your name may offer us protection, Lady Evelyn Trevelyan."  
"You said you would never bring that up again."  
She smiled sadly. "I know I did, my dear. But when you joined us, I had no idea events would take such a turn."

The Circle Robes were discarded, and Eve got her first taste of what it was like to wear trousers. She took to them instantaneously, glad that she wouldn't have to worry about tripping over hems anymore. A mixture of fifteen mages and Templars boarded the ship to Gwaren, but only twelve made it to the Temple of Sacred Ashes after two mages and a Templar had been lost to the fighting in the Hinterlands. Eve prayed that this Conclave would bring peace and stability back to Thedas.


	17. Chapter 17

**Prisoner  
**

 _Dragon 9:41_

Eve stirred and then groaned as pain shot through her head. Lifting a hand to her aching skull, she heard the rattle of chains and wondered why her hand felt so heavy. Cautiously, she opened her eyes, then frowned as she took in her surroundings. For some reason, she was lying on the floor of a dark, cold dungeon and her wrists were manacled.

She pushed herself up and then became aware of the guards who were quick to point their swords at her throat as soon as she moved. Eve was roughly yanked into a kneeling position causing her muscles to protest, and she wondered how long she'd been unconscious. Fear shot through her; not just because she was in a dungeon, but because she had no idea how she'd gotten there.

Eve glanced over to one of the guards. "What's going on? Why am I a prisoner? And, for that matter, where am I?"  
Then a green flash of light flared up on her hand. She jerked back and cried out as pain tore through her hand and arm. The glow subsided, and she cautiously examined the palm, before turning a furious glare at the guards. "What the fuck have you done to me?!"  
This time she got a response, but not the one she'd been hoping for. "Shut up, murderer, or I'll run you through." Feeling the pressure of cold, sharp steel against her neck she decided to obey, but her anxiety kicked up a notch at being accused of murder. Who was she supposed to have murdered? And, why? It was true that she had a bit of a temper, but she'd never knowingly tried to kill anyone. That just didn't sound like her at all. However, as her memory seemed to have a lot of gaps, she really couldn't say for certain whether she'd murdered someone, or not. Eve glanced at her hand, wishing she could get some answers.

As luck would have it, at that moment, the heavy grated door to her cell swung open and hit the wall with a loud slam. Two women were silhouetted against the pale light from outside the door. Eve wondered if these two were going to provide some answers. Unfortunately, as they stepped into the room it became apparent that neither of them was in the best of moods. In fact, judging by the glares being directed towards her, Eve was swiftly coming to the conclusion that they were furious... and that fury was aimed at her. Well, this day was rapidly going to shit!

One woman with short, dark hair and an accent walked behind Eve and leaned over her shoulder. "Tell me now why we shouldn't just kill you? The Conclave is destroyed. Everyone who attended is dead!Except for you."  
Eve's breath hitched as the stranger's words sunk in. Dead? Everyone? All her friends, Masserick... gone? She felt the prick of tears, and asked, "How can they be dead? What happened?"  
Frustration lent Eve an edge, and her voice rose, full of anger and grief, but the stranger ignored the questions, and instead grabbed Eve's wrist and lifted it.  
"Explain this!"

Eve stared at her glowing hand for a moment before the angry woman threw it down with a snort of disgust.

It was obvious that Eve shouldn't antagonise the pissed off woman, but anger overrode her common sense, and she raised her voice. "Are you bloody serious?! I have no idea what it is, or how it got there. For that matter, I have no idea how I got here, or even where we are!"  
The woman lunged for her, grabbing Eve's collar tightly in bunched fists. "You're lying!"  
Eve conceded that it had definitely a bad idea to antagonise the stranger, and was thankful when a red-haired woman stepped in and pulled the aggressive lady off her. "We need her, Cassandra."

Eve filed that name away for later, then pondered the redhead's words. Why did they need her, and for what? She sighed, there was a headache now pulsing behind her eyes; she had way too many questions and absolutely no bloody answers. This day just couldn't get any worse.

Then the faces of Eve's friends drifted before her eyes, bringing her anger to a swift halt and leaving only sorrow in its wake. "All those people."  
"Do you remember what happened? How this all started?" the red-head asked.  
Wanting to be left alone, and tired of the angry questions, Eve answered with something of a snap. "I don't-" But then a memory briefly surfaced. "I was running and there were eyes following... no, chasing. And... and, there was a woman."  
"A woman?" This from the red-head. Eve searched her memory, knowing they wanted more. "She... she reached out to me, then..." The memory ended abruptly and she closed her eyes, feeling even more frustrated.

"Go to the forward camp, Leliana. I will take her to the rift."

Eve raised her brow as she listened to the conversation. A rift? That didn't sound ominous at all. The door shut behind Leliana, and Cassandra moved over to Eve, who, again, tried to get some answers. "What did happen?"  
"It... it would be better to show you."

Eve rolled her eyes. More ominous sentences, just what she needed. While speaking, Cassandra pulled out a key and unlocked the manacles, however, as these were immediately replaced with rope, Eve didn't feel that her situation had improved.

After being helped to her feet, Eve was led out of the dungeon, and quickly covered her eyes, blinking at the sudden change in contrast. As her vision adjusted to the brightness, she lowered her arm and then gasped as she looked upon a huge, green, swirling mess in the sky. Now she understood why Cassandra had thought it best to show her because trying to explain this to someone would be nigh on impossible.

"We call it the breach. It's a massive rift in to the world of demons that grows larger with each passing hour."  
Apparently, she'd been wrong when she thought her day couldn't get any worse.

"It's not the only such rift," Cassandra explained, "just the largest. All were caused by the explosion at the Conclave."  
Eve stared at her with an expression of disbelief. "An explosion can do that?!"  
"This one did. Unless we act, the breach may grow until it swallows the world."  
"That would be-" Eve's words morphed into a shout of pain as her hand flared up. Dropping to her knees, she clutched at her wrist, teeth gritted against the agony.

"Each time the breach expands, your mark spreads, and it is killing you."  
"Well, that's just great," Eve said as the pain resided. "What exactly is this thing, and how did I get it?"  
"It may be the key to stopping this, but there isn't much time."  
There was a pleading note in Cassandra's voice, but it was unnecessary. Eve couldn't ignore something that was going to swallow the whole world, and of course, there was the issue of it killing her. Although, she still wasn't sure what was expected of her.

"The key to doing what?" Eve asked, feeling as though she'd missed part of the discussion.  
"To closing the breach. Whether that is possible is something we shall discover shortly."

With a grimace, she looked down at the sickly green glow on her hand. She couldn't see how this little thing was supposed to close that bloody great hole. To say she was dubious was an understatement. However, as there were no better plans available, Eve decided that the least she could do was try. "I understand. I'll do what I can to help."  
Cassandra smiled and helped Eve to her feet, then pulling a knife she grabbed the rope binding Eve's hands and quickly cut them.

With a sigh of relief, Eve rubbed her wrists and followed Cassandra. As they made their way to a gate, Cassandra told her about the death of Divine Justinia V. It was clear that Cassandra had been hit hard by the death, as had a lot of other people, if the glares being thrown at Eve were anything to judge by. She could hardly blame them, nor Cassandra for her earlier rage and suspicions, considering that out of the hundreds who had attended the conclave, she was the only survivor.  
"Maker's balls, what a mess," Eve muttered.


	18. Chapter 18

**New Faces**

After passing through the gate, they walked along the mountain path but quickly moved to the roadside as a few people went running past screaming about it being the end of the world. Glancing up at the rift, Eve silently agreed with them.

"So, where are we-" The rift flared up and so did the mark on her hand. Biting back a scream, she staggered and fell, scraping her knees on the sharp rocks that were scattered over the road. But that pain barely registered in comparison to the agony tearing through her body.

Once again she was helped to her feet, and Eve decided to save her strength and keep the questions for later. If she lasted that long. They skirted a broken down wagon and started to cross a bridge when a large meteor slammed into the ground and suddenly Eve was falling. The air was knocked from her lungs as she landed in the snow. Rubbing her behind, Eve was thankful that she had some padding back there, otherwise, that would have a lot more painful.

Before she could ask if Cassandra was all right, the woman shouted at her to stay back and then dashed forward to fight a shade demon. Thinking she might need assistance, Eve started to follow until it became clear that Cassandra was a very capable warrior. So, she stepped back and waited, thankful for a moment to catch her breath. But the rest was short lived.

A foul smell emanated from the ground, and Eve wrinkled her nose in disgust as she looked around for the source. Her gaze landed on a patch of ground that was dark green and bubbling in an ominous manner. "Well, that can't be good," she muttered and started moving away, wishing she had her staff. Drawing on her mana, a shimmering ball of fire formed in her hand, but she knew that, without the focus of her staff, it wouldn't cause much damage. With a growing sense of urgency, she glanced around the area.

The ground was littered with items dropped or left behind as people had made a panicked flight to safety. Surely there was as staff amidst all of that? Just as a shade pulled itself from the earth, sunlight glinted off a metal surface, catching Eve's eye. At a glance, she saw two-thirds of a staff poking out from the snow. She sprinted over and grabbed it, then, with renewed confidence, turned to face the shade that was moving rapidly towards her.

The ball of fire flew through the air, and with unerring accuracy, hit the demon. The shade barely paused as it dealt with the fire, then it was on the move again. Slamming her staff onto the ground, electricity sparked across the earth striking the demon again. After a few more bolts, the shade decided it would try and find easier prey and turned away. Eve groaned when she realised it was heading towards Cassandra who was still fighting a Greater shade. More bolts of electricity followed the tenacious demon and with a moan, it finally went down.

At the same time, Cassandra finished off her demon. She turned and her brows pulled down in a ferocious frown as she stormed towards Eve, her sword still drawn. "Drop the weapon!"  
"But I was just..." The unwavering blade moved closer. "Maker's balls! Fine, I'm putting down the weapon."

She wanted to point out that even without the staff, she still had magic at her command, but the vicious-looking sword deterred her. Slowly, Eve bent down but then was stopped when Cassandra, with a frustrated sigh, said. "I know you don't really need a staff. Keep it. I might not be able to defend you. And I should remember that you offered to help."

Eve smiled. "Well, I was going to remind you of that, but thought it might seem rude."

Cassandra's eyes narrowed, then seeing the impish twinkle in Eve's eyes, she chuckled. "I'm sorry, you're not really catching me at my best."  
Looking around at the devastation, Eve said, "I think, considering the circumstances, you're doing a great job of holding it together."  
Cassandra smiled, and the first tentative threads of friendship began to fall into place.

As they continued to make their way through the Frostback Mountains, Cassandra handed over some health potions. "I'm sure we're going to run into more demons, so you might need these." "Thanks." After putting the vials away, Eve asked, "So, where are we heading?"  
"You're going to test that mark out on something a little smaller first."  
Eve raised anxious eyes to the massive swirling rift in the sky. "That seems like a good idea, especially when I don't have a clue how to get rid of them."

More meteors fell to the ground providing them with another wave of demons to fight. They kept moving on and eventually reached an area where the distinct sounds of fighting could be heard. Without hesitation, Eve rushed forward to help. Five minutes later, the last demon fell, and Eve turned her attention to the much smaller rift. She was about to ask for some help when a male elf grabbed her wrist. "Quickly, before more come through!"

He pushed her hand against the small rift, there was a loud crackling sound, and then a stream of green energy flowed between her hand and the tear. Eve grimaced at the pain, and then there was a burst of light as the hole seemed to implode. And with that, it was gone.

The elf released her, and Eve stared down at her hand in surprise mixed with just a little wonder. "That was... strange. How did you get it to do that?"  
He smiled slightly. "I did nothing. The credit is yours."  
"So, I just point it at a rift and it does its own thing?"

He nodded. "Whatever magic opened that breach in the sky also placed that mark on your hand. I theorised that the mark might be able to close the rifts that have opened in the breach's wake. And it seems I was correct."

While Eve was still trying to wrap her head around everything he'd just said, Cassandra spoke up, "Meaning it could also close the breach itself."  
The elf tilted his head to the side, considering. "Possibly." He turned his gaze to Eve. "It seems you hold the key to our salvation."  
She swallowed back the nerves that threatened to overwhelm her. "Great. No pressure then!"

A rough, deep voice joined the conversation. "Good to know, and here I thought we'd be ass-deep in demons forever."  
Eve turned to see a dwarf in a leather coat and a tunic that was open to reveal a hairy chest. By the Maker, he had so much chest hair! She tore her eyes away and looked at him, and received a serious shock. He had no beard! He was a dwarf with no beard. Surely, that was unheard of? True, she hadn't been about the world much, well, barely at all, but she was fairly certain that a dwarf was expected to have a beard.  
He put a peculiar looking crossbow in its harness and walked over. "Varric Tethras, rogue, storyteller," he looked at Cassandra and winked, "and occasionally, unwanted tag along."

Eve had missed the last half of the introduction after hearing his name. This was Varric Tethras! The man who wrote The Tale of the Champion, the man who was a close friend of Garret Hawke. She was a little starstruck, which was the reason she started babbling like a lunatic. "You... you're him. I mean, it's you. I can't believe it. I read your book, well, books. But, I read The Tale of the Champion first. We all read it. I think everyone in the..." Memories of her friends hit like a sledgehammer, and she stopped so abruptly that she bit her tongue.

Clenching her hands, Eve focused on the pain of her nails digging into flesh and fought back the tears, knowing now was not the time to give into grief. With an effort, she smiled and put out her hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Varric."  
He chuckled. "Likewise, ah, I don't actually know your name. The Seeker is terrible at making introductions."  
The smile was more sincere this time. "It's Eve."  
"My name is Solas if there are to be introductions. I'm pleased to see you still live."

Eve turned back to the elf, raising at brow at his comment.  
"He means he kept that mark from killing you," Varric translated.  
"Oh, then, thank you. Do you know much about this type of magic? I admit it's not one I've ever come across before."

"Unlike you, Solas is an apostate," the Seeker said.  
"Technically, all mages are now apostates, Cassandra," Solas replied. "But yes, my travels have allowed me to learn much of the Fade. Far more than any Circle mage."

Eve raised an indignant eyebrow and was prepared to discuss his arrogant comment with some heat, but Cassandra intervened, stating that they needed to reach the forward camp as soon as possible.

In between fights, Eve answered questions about what had happened, and what she could remember, or to be more accurate, what she couldn't remember. Varric seemed quite friendly, and even Cassandra was becoming a little more affable. Solas was quiet for the most part, interspersing a comment only occasionally during the conversation.

Another rift had to be closed before they could enter the forward camp, and Eve still had no idea how the mark worked. However, she supposed that what mattered was that it did work.

Stepping through a set of double doors, Eve noticed Leliana having a discussion with a man, who, judging by his clothes, was a member of the Chantry.

Drawing closer, the man spotted Cassandra and turned his ire on her. "As Grand Chancellor of the Chantry, I hereby order you to take this prisoner to Val Royeaux to face execution."  
"I'd rather not," Eve murmured. "I'm really not dressed for Val Royeaux." She heard a chuckle from Varric, but her attention was on Cassandra who had stormed up to the man. "Order me? You are a glorified clerk, a bureaucrat!"  
"And you are a thug."  
Eve rolled her eyes. This man was an idiot because no one in their right mind would say something like that to Cassandra.

The argument continued, but Eve had stopped listening as she stared at the growing breach, which was something the Chantry clerk seemed oblivious to. There was finally a break in the heated discussion, so she decided to speak up. "Look, perhaps you could all continue your argument after we close that huge hole in the sky."

As if annoyed at her words, the breach flared again and so did her hand. "Fuck!" She clenched her eyes tight while fighting through the pain, and although her legs shook, she managed to stay upright this time. Nothing like progress to keep the spirits up. There were nods of agreement from everyone except the clerk... chancellor, whatever he was. It was finally decided to charge with the soldiers after Eve caustically commented that if they didn't get the damn breach closed soon, she wouldn't survive long enough for their trial.

It didn't take too long before they reached another set of doors, already thrown wide. Stepping inside, the first thing Eve noticed was the row of covered corpses. She couldn't help but wonder if any of them were her friends and moved towards them.  
"I wouldn't look. It's not very pleasant."  
She turned to Varric. "I had friends with me at the Conclave. I thought..."  
"I'm sorry, but they won't be here. These are bodies of soldiers who died after the explosion."  
Swallowing past the lump in her throat, she turned away from the row of corpses. "I see, thanks."  
He patted her arm and walked away. Eve wondered where the bodies were from the Temple of Sacred Ashes so that she could pay her respects. She decided to have a chat with Cassandra after the breach was closed.


	19. Chapter 19

**Reunion**

The sound of fighting could be heard through an open doorway which was barely being held upright by the remnants of a damaged wall. Pushing away thoughts of the dead, Eve turned her attention to the living. Grabbing her staff, she ran up the stairs and focused on killing the demons that were attacking the soldiers. Smoke hung thick in the still air, and for a moment, she was back in the Circle tower with the smell of burnt flesh and blood. With a shake of her head, she dislodged the memory and concentrated on the fight at hand. Eventually, the demons were gone, and Eve closed the rift, noting that it seemed a little easier this time, though just as painful.

"Sealed as before, you are becoming quite proficient at this," Solas said.  
Varric strolled forward, crossbow in hand. "Let's hope it works on the big one."  
She turned to face them shaking her hand to ease the sting. "Yeah, that would-"  
"Lady Cassandra, you managed to close the rift. Well done."

Eve's breath caught in her throat at the sound of a voice she'd never expected to hear again. Slowly, she turned around, her heart hammering in her chest, eyes wide, barely breathing. That familiar fluttering in her stomach immediately kicked back in, even after being dormant for ten years.  
Cassandra heaved a sigh. "Do not congratulate me, Commander. This is the prisoner's doing."  
Shit! Varric was right; the Seeker was terrible at introductions.

Cullen glanced over saying, "We've lost a lot of... Maker's breath! Eve?"  
His eyes widened, and she drank in the sight of their warm honey-brown colour, before letting her gaze travel over the rest of him. Having only ever seen him in his Templar armour, Eve was taken aback by his current outfit. She felt a flush cover her cheeks as she perceived how well the black leather trousers fitted him.

With an effort, she dragged her gaze back to his face and saw her own surprise reflected in his expression. She smiled and took a few steps towards him. "It's a small world, isn't it?"  
He nodded, still looking dumbfounded. "How did... I mean..." He seemed to recollect their surroundings. "It's good to see you," he said, a small smile hovering on his lips.  
Feeling flustered by the smile, she replied, "And you too, Cul- Commander."

With a chuckle, he walked over to help one of the injured soldiers. She watched him go, wondering if she would ever see him again. Then the massive rift flared and so did her hand. Biting back a groan of pain, she figured the chances of that happening were pretty slim.

"So, you and Cullen?" There was definitely a quiver of amusement in Varric's voice.  
"What? No! It's not like that." However, the blush that covered Eve's face betrayed her desire for it to be exactly like that.  
"But you do know him?" Cassandra persisted.  
"Yes." She wasn't deliberately being vague, but she was still trying to wrap her head around the unexpected reunion.

Wanting to distract them from their curiosity, she suggested that they keep moving. Without waiting for their agreement, she jumped down from a crumbling ledge. That's when Eve got her first look at the devastation caused by the explosion. She could actually feel the blood drain from her face and quickly bent over, hands on knees while fighting the urge to throw up or pass out... or both.

She was given a moment to compose herself, then a hand rested on her shoulder. "I'm sorry. I should have warned you," Cassandra said quietly, as though unwilling to disturb the dead.  
Drawing in a deep breath, Eve stood up slowly, her eyes taking in what remained of those who had gathered for the Conclave. The flesh had been burnt away, leaving nothing but skeletons, some of them still alight, which just made the whole scene that much more macabre. They were in various positions, some lying on the ground, others on their knees. Had they been praying when the explosion happened? Perhaps the shockwave had knocked them down. One person looked as though he or she had tried to crawl away from the pursuing heat, or maybe hide under a table. Either way, the result had been the same, leaving nothing but a burnt-out shell.

If this was the final resting place of her friends, then she would offer her prayers here. Eve knelt down on one knee and placed a hand on the ground, ignoring the heat that scorched her skin. With head bowed, she whispered a prayer for the departed, grateful to the others for allowing her a moment.

Then, standing, she tore her gaze away from the terrible sights and started walking. She wanted... no, she needed to get out of this place, and in order to do that, she had to close the breach. As they climbed a ramp, she looked down and realised that the slope had once been a flight of stairs that had melted under the assault. "Maker's breath! What kind of magic could generate an explosion of this magnitude and intense heat?"

Before anyone could reply, a voice spoke out of nowhere, deep and dark, and a fearful shiver crawled down her spine. "Bring forth the sacrifice."  
It was Cassandra who asked the obvious question, "What are we hearing?"  
Having no answers, Eve remained silent. Solas, however, replied, "At a guess, the person who created the breach."

The voice went silent and Eve's attention was captured by huge shards of red crystal that seemed to grow from the walls and ground. Having never seen anything like it before, she wandered over to one large spike to get a closer look.  
"This stuff is red lyrium, Seeker." Varric's rough voice sounded concerned.  
"I see it, Varric."

Eve glanced over her shoulder, worried that they both sounded concerned. Red lyrium? That was new. Then she recalled Varric's book about the Champion and remembered he'd written about finding an idol made from red lyrium while exploring the Deep Roads. According to the story, it had then been crafted into a sword for Knight-Commander Meredith, which some say, had led her into madness and eventually resulted in her being turned into a statue.

"Yes, but what's it doing here?" Varric asked.  
Again, it was Solas who offered a possible explanation. "Magic could have drawn lyrium from beneath the temple. Corrupted it."  
There was a sound of disgust from Varric. "It's evil. Whatever you do, don't touch it."  
Eve quickly pulled back her hand which was about to do exactly that and cast Varric a sheepish glance.

Then that disembodied voice spoke again. "Keep the sacrifice still." This was followed almost immediately by a panicked female voice. "Someone, help me!"  
She was about to ask who the newcomer was when Cassandra answered her unspoken question. "That is Divine Justinia's voice."  
Eve shivered, thinking that the whole scene was incredibly creepy. However, she had little time to ponder the matter because they had reached their destination.

The breach crackled and sparked with powerful energy, and as usual, Eve's hand decided to join in the fun. She stared up, and wondered how this would work; the smaller rifts had been lower and within easy range of her hand. But this thing... she was going to need a bloody ladder to reach it. Eve was about to raise her concern when the Divine spoke again, this was followed by another newcomer. "What's going on here?"  
Her eyes widened with shock when she realised the voice belonged to herself. A detail Cassandra was quick to pounce on. "That was your voice. Most Holy called out to you, but..."

Whatever she was about to say was left unspoken because images suddenly coalesced in the air, like wisps of a memory dragged out from the Fade. A large shadowy figure stood in front of the Divine who was bound by strange red magical bands that ran the length of her arms. The image shifted to show Eve running into the scene and asking the question they'd all heard earlier.

Eve's brow furrowed as she stood watching these events unfold. Frustrated, she once more tried to dredge up some recollection of the scene taking place in front of her. But there was nothing, no flashback, just a blank slate. It was as if this was all happened to someone else, who coincidentally looked exactly like her. Yeah, even she wasn't buying that story.

The image faded, leaving a stunned silence. Then Cassandra broke it. "You were there! Who attacked? And the Divine, is she...? Was this vision true? What are we seeing?"  
The Seeker was right in front of Eve now, eyes narrowed in anger, bombarding her with questions which Eve had no answers for.  
"I don't remember." Her voice rang out clearly, edged with impatience and a lot of frustration.

Solas provided a distraction by explaining that the rift had temporarily closed and that in order to seal it properly they would first need to open it. Eve gave him a dubious look. "Is that a good idea? Surely more demons will pour through once I open it."  
He inclined his head. "You are correct. But it can't be left in this state of flux. It must be sealed."

Eve could feel an uncomfortable tug between her hand and the rift. Glancing to Cassandra, she waited for a sign that they were ready. The Seeker shouted instructions to the soldiers positioned around the ruins; then, drawing her sword, she gave a nod. Drawing in a deep breath, Eve raised her hand and the green stream of energy connected immediately. Well, it seemed she needn't have worried about reaching it. There was a high-pitched whine, and then the breach flashed and pulsed.

The connection broke and she stumbled back shaking her arm to relieve the numbness. A green shape was materialising and finally formed into a Pride Demon.  
"Ah crap!"  
Grabbing her staff, she fired a few bolts of electricity at it. The demon laughed. Each stab of a sword, each piercing arrow, each bolt of magic was just brushed away; the demon seemed almost invulnerable and it was wreaking havoc on the soldiers. She had to do something before they were all wiped out.


	20. Chapter 20

**The Inquisition**

"We must strip its defences, make it vulnerable," Cassandra shouted over the din of the fight.  
"Oh, that's a great idea, let me go and get the make-every-demon-vulnerable kit. I'm sure I must have one in my pack." Cassandra glared, and Eve shrugged. What, in the Maker's name, did she know about stripping a demon's defences? Backing up closer to the breach, the mark on her hand flared. She looked at it, then at the rift.  
"Fuck it!"  
Deciding it couldn't hurt to try, she raised her hand and the mark connected. This time, Eve focused on the tear and actually felt something. It was weakening; she was drawing out the energy that sustained it. With the demon still alive the breach couldn't be destroyed, but she was pretty sure that if she kept drawing on the rift, she could diminish the demon's strength. So she pulled hard, the rift pulsed and she heard Cassandra shout, "Now is our chance while its defences are down!"

Eve turned to see the Pride demon had fallen down on one knee. Elated, she was about to go back to weakening the rift, but right then, a number of shades decided to join in the fight. With a sigh, she grabbed her staff and started casting spells to take down the enemies. And so it went on, fighting off the shades, diminishing the rift a bit at a time so that the demon could be hurt until eventually, it was dead.  
"Seal the rift, now!" Cassandra shouted.

Taking a deep breath, Eve slowly exhaled, then lifted her hand and once more the connection clicked into place. Thinking of the other rifts she'd closed, she figured this one couldn't be that much worse. A couple of seconds more and it would all be over. But the seconds passed, and the rift wasn't doing what it what it was supposed to do. The others had imploded quite quickly, but this one just wanted to drag it out.

The pain in her arm was excruciating, her whole body felt like it was about to be torn apart. Sweat trickled down her back and face, and her legs started to shake. Fearing she would pass out before the breach was sealed, she gritted her teeth and pulled on the energy with everything she had.

Eve grunted under the strain, drawing more and more of the energy into her, knowing that she couldn't hold out for much longer. The high-pitched sound kept growing louder, tighter until a massive green pulse shot into the air. Staggering from the backlash of magic, her vision blurred and tremors consumed her body. "Did I do..." The ground tilted upwards as unconsciousness claimed her.

-x-

There was a throbbing sensation in the back of Eve's skull when she awoke. It took a moment to realise that she was lying on a soft bed with a plump pillow cradling her sore head. A definite improvement from the dungeon. With a happy sigh, she turned over trying to recapture her sleep, but the aching in her head wouldn't allow it. Eventually, she gave up and carefully pried open her eyes to look around at her new surroundings.

While deciding whether to get out of bed, the door opened, and in walked a female elf carrying a crate. Thinking she might get some information from the friendly looking elf, Eve sat up. Seeing this, the elf shrieked, dropped her crate, and started babbling nervously. Eve was a bit nonplussed; it was true that she didn't always look her best when she woke up, but she'd never encountered such a strong reaction before. Swinging her legs over the edge of the bed, Eve was about to get up, when she noticed her actions had caused the young elf to step back, still rambling on.

Maker's breath, just how bad did she look? Had she been scarred while attempting to close the breach?  
She was about to ask where Cassandra was when the elf did something extraordinary. Dropping to her knees, the woman begged for Eve's forgiveness and her blessing and finished by declaring herself to be Eve's humble servant.

Dumbfounded, she stared at the elf, thinking that perhaps the woman had been drinking a little too freely.  
"You are back in Haven, my Lady. They say you saved us. The breach stopped growing, just like the mark on your hand. It's all anyone has talked about for the last three days."

That comment made Eve sit up and take notice. Three days?! Maker, no wonder she was feeling a bit stiff. Feeling discomfited by the elf's reaction, she told her to get off her knees. The woman got to her feet and started backing towards the door. "I'm certain Lady Cassandra would want to know you've wakened. She said, 'At once'."  
Now they were getting somewhere. "And where is she?"  
"In the Chantry with the Chancellor. 'At once,' she said." Then the elf darted out the door like the Archdemon was after her.

Tentatively, Eve reached up and touched her face, happy to find that it all still seemed to be there, or at least, she couldn't feel any new scars. Instinctively, she looked down at her wrist and the handprint left by the Rage Demon. Eleven years had passed since that incident and the scar was now a shiny off-white colour.

With a shake of her head, she pushed the old memories away. Looking down the length of her body, Eve found that she was dressed in a neutral coloured set of clothes. She grimaced at the bland colour but figured it would have been worse if they had dressed her in robes. With a sigh, she scrubbed a hand through her hair and came to the conclusion that the first thing she needed was a comb.

Standing up, she walked over to a chest of drawers, on top of which was neatly laid out a brush, comb and some leather ties. After a bit of a tussle, she managed to get out the knots and quickly pulled it all back into a simple ponytail. With a tug at her beige jacket, she set off to find Cassandra

Eve opened the door and stared wide-eyed at the mass of people gathered. Quickly, she closed the door and looked around, wondering whether there was a back window she could escape through. However, the cabin was small and it didn't take long for her to realise the only way out was through the front. She pulled the door open again, hoping against hope that everyone had left. Of course, that wasn't the case, and the crowd of people stared expectantly at her. She sincerely hoped they weren't expecting a speech because her mouth had suddenly dried up. Stepping outside, the crowd parted, and she paused.

With a nervous cough and her face burning, she wiped the sweat from her brow and quickly started walking along the path they were making for her. She hoped they were leading her to the Chantry because she had no idea where it was. Focused on just getting through the crowd, it took a moment for her to realise that they were talking about her.

"She sealed the breach."  
"They say she walked out of the Fade."  
"Maker, where did she get those clothes?"  
"That's the Herald of Andraste."

Eve glared at the woman who had made the remark about her clothes, not that she blamed her. But then the last comment pushed all thoughts about the hideous outfit from her mind. Herald of Andraste?! Why, in the Maker's name, would anyone call her that?  
Ahead of her loomed a large building, and assuming that was the Chantry, she threw caution to the wind and bolted the last few metres.

As the large doors closed softly behind her, she let out a sigh of relief and looked around at the interior. There was a wooden door at the far end of the room, from which she could hear loud voices - one of whom sounded like Cassandra. Deciding that was where she needed to go, Eve walked up and knocked, then waited. She chuckled when she realised that was a habit from her days in the Circle.

However, after a minute the heated argument continued, and it was clear that no one had heard her knock. With a deep breath, she grasped the heavy iron handle, pushed the door open and walked in. Chancellor Roderick immediately barked, "Arrest that woman, and put her in chains!"  
"Maker's balls, not again? Those chains really chafed my wrists," Eve muttered.  
"Belay that order and leave us," Cassandra stated in a voice that brooked no argument. The two Templars gave a nod and retreated, shutting the door behind them. Eve joined the remaining occupants who were gathered around a scarred wooden table, wondering at the Chancellor's continued mistrust and anger.  
"I tried to shut the breach."  
"It almost killed her," Leliana chimed in.  
"And yet here you are. How very convenient!" Roderick retorted.

Before Eve could defend herself, Cassandra entered into the argument and did an excellent job of taking him down a few notches. Finally, he left the room with an angry scowl, and Eve rubbed the back of her skull to ease her headache, thankful for the temporary silence that now filled the room.

Cassandra slammed a large book down on the table, and Eve winced as her head throbbed.  
"So, what happens now?" Eve asked.  
Leliana answered, "This is the Divine's directive. Rebuild the Inquisition of old. Find those who will stand against the chaos. We aren't ready; we have no leader, no numbers, and now no Chantry support."  
"But we have no choice," Cassandra added. "We must act now, with you at our side."  
Leliana leaned on the table. "You are our only hope of sealing the breach permanently."  
Rubbing a hand over her eyes, Eve said, "I thought I'd already done that?"  
"It's only temporarily sealed, plus there are many more rifts out there that need closing."  
Leliana made a compelling argument so that Eve felt she couldn't say no. "If you are truly trying to restore order..."  
Cassandra nodded. "That is the plan."  
"Then I'll help in any way I can." Cassandra gripped Eve's hand firmly and shook. Maker, that woman had a grip that would make an ogre wince.

After that, plans were made, proclamations were written and nailed to doors, banners hung and flags raised, all flying the symbol of the Inquisition. Slowly, a change came over the small village as each person became infused with hope.


	21. Chapter 21

**Catching Up**

Finding herself with some time to spare, Eve wandered around Haven trying to get her bearings and getting to know everyone. She had a chat with Solas, who was a little strange, but also fascinating. In anyone else, she might have thought the stories he told were lies or exaggerated facts. But that just didn't seem to fit this mage. He didn't brag, he just calmly stated the facts as he knew them.  
She also had a talk with Varric while standing around the fire, and learnt more about Hawke, and a little about the dwarf himself.

After covering all the areas within the walls of Haven, Eve decided to explore outside the main gate. In the distance, she could see Cassandra practising with her sword against some very abused training dummies. Wanting to know more about the Seeker, she decided to head over and have a chat. However, while crossing the grounds she heard Cullen's voice and stopped to watch him training new recruits. The talk with Cassandra was momentarily forgotten as she debated with herself about going over and saying hello.

She was still undecided when he moved over to one of the recruits and adjusted the man's stance. As he strode back to his original spot, his eyes lifted and he looked straight at Eve, a smile lifting the corner of his usually stern mouth. Drawn by that warm smile, she found herself walking over to him, while desperately trying to think of things they could talk about, and hoping she wouldn't stumble or do something equally idiotic.

However, her steps slowed as she drew closer; Cullen didn't look very well. There were dark shadows that betrayed a lack of sleep, but perhaps these were more defined due to the pale colour of his skin. He'd also acquired a vicious looking scar cut into the right side of his upper lip; in short, he looked like he'd been through the wars. Eve was conscious of a desire to wrap her arms around him and tell him everything would be all right. But, the training area hardly seemed the place to do that, and it didn't seem like the best idea when they hadn't seen each other for over ten years.

She stopped in front of him. "Hello, Cullen." She mentally rolled her eyes at the trite greeting; that had sounded much better in her head.  
"I never expected to see you again," he said quietly. His hand reached out in what seemed to be an involuntary reaction because as soon as he realised what he was doing, he let it drop back to his side. They stood there awkwardly for a moment, both with so much to say, but neither of them knowing where to start.

Unable to stand the uncomfortable silence any longer, Eve blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "I never thought I'd see you out of your Templar armour." Her eyes widened at the unintended double entendre as soon as the words left her mouth.  
"Oh Maker, that came out completely wrong," she said, wishing her cheeks would stop burning.  
His brow lifted and there was a gleam of amusement in his honey-brown eyes, and then he laughed. It was music to her ears, and she joined in. When they'd calmed down, Cullen moved them away from the noisy training area so that they could talk more easily.

"Did you decide to move to another Circle?" He set the ball rolling for which Eve was grateful as she still hadn't decided on what to say.  
"Oh yes, I moved to Ostwick. It wouldn't have been my first choice, but it turned out well. I made some good friends..."

Their faces swam before her eyes and she stopped to swallow past a lump in her throat. With everything that had happened since sealing the breach, there hadn't been time to think of those she'd lost, but it all came back now. Like a wave crashing on the shore, memories flooded her mind, and the first tears slipped from her eyes. Hastily, she wiped them away, not wanting to grieve in public.

His hand wrapped around her wrist. "Lieutenant, take over the training. I'll be back shortly." Then they were walking swiftly away from the camp. Eve kept her head down, but even so, she noticed how he shielded her from prying eyes with his body until they were out of sight.

She cleared her throat. "I'm... I'm all right." But even to her own ears, her voice sounded thick with emotion.  
"No, you're not, Eve." His voice was gentle as his thumb slid over her wrist tracing the rapid pulse. "Were your friends with you at the Conclave?"  
She nodded wordlessly, unable to speak past the lump in her throat. Nails digging into the palms of her hands, she struggled to get herself under control.  
"It's okay. There's no one to see or hear you." The compassion in his voice was her undoing.

There was no way to stop the memories that surfaced, each one hurting her heart until at last, the first sob broke free. Tears spilt down her face and another heartbroken sob quickly followed. The force of Eve's grief stole the breath from her lungs and the strength from her legs so that her knees started to buckle. However, before she hit the ground, Cullen's arms slipped around her waist and drew her close. She buried her face in the fur that bordered his coat and her hands gripped at it, needing an anchor amidst the emotional storm.

Eve wasn't sure how much time passed, she only knew that he'd held her through it all, letting her grieve in private, but not alone. When there were no tears left, she patted her pockets trying to find a hanky. A soft cotton one was pressed into Eve's hand, and she thanked him as she wiped away the evidence of her sorrow. By the time she'd finished, the handkerchief was a soggy mess. "I think I'd better wash this first before returning it to you."  
That crooked smile was back, "It's all right, you keep it."

She chuckled and went to take a step back, but his arms tightened, pulling her against him. Lifting her face to his, there was a questioning and hopeful look in her grey eyes. He stared at Eve for the space of a heartbeat and his thumb slowly moved across her cheek leaving a tingling sensation in its wake. Her lips parted in anticipation...

"Commander Cullen?" A messenger weaved between the trees, and Cullen quickly let her go and stepped back. She gritted her teeth and tried not to think of horrible ways to kill the man who'd interrupted them.  
The man looked from Eve to Cullen and put on his poker face. "I'm sorry to interrupt, Commander, but Sister Leliana wanted a word."  
"Thank you."

The messenger stood there as if expecting a show of some kind. "That will be all!" Cullen said sternly. The man jumped a little, turned and ran back to Haven.  
Cullen carded a hand through his hair. "I shouldn't have... I need to go."  
"Of course."

She forced a smile in place to hide the hurt. Not because he needed to leave - as the Commander of the Inquisition's army she understood he was busy - no, it was because of the regret in his voice. It was because he hadn't been able to meet her eyes after that moment. It was because, regardless of the fact that they no longer wore armour or robes, to him she would always be a Circle mage, and perhaps there was still too much Templar left in Cullen to see past that.  
It had just been a comforting embrace, she told herself, and he'd gotten a bit lost in the moment. They both had. Eve watched him walk back to camp until he was out of sight, then decided to go exploring, needing some time alone.

An hour or so later, she returned feeling rather pleased with herself. During her exploration, she'd located a logging stand, the notes that Adan the apothecary wanted, and had picked quite a lot of elfroot. She thought of the massive bunch of herbs in her pack and decided she might have gone over the top with the elfroot.

At the foundry, she stopped and thanked Harritt for the armour he'd made, before finally making her way over to Cassandra. The Seeker was still beating the shit out of the dummies. Eve ducked as a wooden head flew in her direction, and wondered if the woman was pissed off or whether she normally practised this vigorously?  
Picking up the head, she debated about whether this would be a good time to talk to her. Then decided that this talk couldn't go any worse than the last one she'd had.

It turned out that Cassandra was feeling a bit miffed, but more at herself than Eve. This statement was received with a sigh of relief because she definitely didn't want to get on the wrong side of the Seeker. However, after they'd cleared the air, she found that Cassandra had a good sense of humour and was actually quite friendly. Another messenger ran over, and Eve rolled her eyes, wondering if they just waited until she got into a conversation before interrupting?

It was a request for both of them to attend a meeting in the council room. Upon entering, Eve found herself facing Leliana, Cullen, and a pretty, well-dressed woman, who introduced herself as Ambassador Josephine Montilyet. That started a string of introductions; Leliana was in the middle of explaining her role within the Inquisition when Cassandra cut her off and bluntly stated that she was the Spymaster.

Eve chuckled at the disgruntled look on Leliana's face, but stopped when Cassandra said, "And, of course, you already know our Commander."  
"Yes, that's right," Eve said while battling down the blush that spread across her face. She thought she'd succeeded but then saw a smirk on the Spymaster's face. Damn it!  
"So, how is it you two know each other?" Leliana asked, looking innocent but with a glint of devilry in her eyes.  
"Eve was a mage at the Circle of Ferelden during the time I was stationed there as a Templar," Cullen replied in a matter-of-fact tone.  
There was an infinitesimal pause, and then Leliana smiled. "You're Solona's friend?"  
Eve raised an eyebrow. "I am. How do you know that?"  
The spymaster chuckled. "She talked of you a lot when we were travelling together during the blight."  
"Oh Maker. You're that Leliana? Andraste's flaming ass, why didn't I make that connection earlier?" Cassandra smiled. "Well, you've had a lot on your mind."

After introductions had been made, Eve's attention was drawn to a large map spread out over the table, and she was given her first assignment. Meet someone called Mother Giselle at the Crossroads in the Hinterlands and collect any suitable agents along the way.

So, off she went with Cassandra, Solas, and Varric. Initially, it seemed quite a nice place, pretty and countrified, with the occasional ram or fennec running past. Peaceful. That's the word she would have attributed to it. However, as they drew closer to the Crossroads, the sound of fighting reached their ears.

Mages on one side, Templars on the other, and the poor bloody villagers stuck in the middle. Cassandra tried to reason with the Templars, Solas tried to reason with the mages. Eve didn't bother trying to reason with any of them, she just grabbed her staff and started taking down the idiots who thought it would be a good idea to fight in the middle of a populated village.

Afterwards, Eve managed to find Mother Giselle and listened to her proposal. The woman seemed to think it would be a good idea to go and talk to the Chantry in Val Royeaux. Eve was a little dubious as they hadn't exactly been the greatest supporters of the Inquisition. However, she reasoned that if the Inquisition didn't show up then it might seem like they had something to hide. So after wandering around closing a few rifts, helping out some villagers, and collecting a shit load of elfroot, it was back to Haven to discuss Mother Giselle's proposal.


	22. Chapter 22

**A Chance to Talk**

Eve was playing with one of the little raven markers used on the map while a rather heated discussion took place about whether it was even worth making an appearance in Val Royeaux.  
"Considering you're the one who's going to be talking to them, what are your thoughts on this matter, Herald?" Cullen asked.  
There were two reasons she didn't immediately answer: the first was because she still hadn't gotten used to the new title; the second was because she was busy trying to fix the wings of the raven which she'd accidentally bent while trying to see if they were movable.

"Herald?"  
Suddenly realising that the room had gone quiet, she looked up from the mangled marker and saw that all eyes were on her.  
"Ah, well..." Discreetly, she placed the twisted marker back on the map. "I say we go. Chantry support could be a good thing, and if nothing else, they can at least confirm that I'm not some kind of a monster. Also, what is with this Herald thing?"  
Cassandra explained, "Those who saw you walk out of a rift said they saw a woman behind you; they believe it was Andraste and that she sent you to help us in our hour of need."

Eve scrubbed a hand through her hair, wishing she hadn't asked. She believed in the Maker and even took some comfort in prayers. But this? This was too much. It made her feel like an imposter, considering she swore like a soldier, constantly had naughty thoughts about a certain ex-Templar, and had developed a strange obsession with elfroot. All right, that last one wasn't relevant, but the point was, that she didn't match the ideals of a holy person.

However, trying to explain this to the leaders of the Inquisition met with little success. Cassandra just said that there was no denying Eve had been sent at the right time with the ability to help. Finding this difficult to argue with, Eve let the matter drop.

The next day they were off to Val Royeaux. She was excited to be going there having read much about the beauty of the city and the various shops and cafés. And, apparently, they made some lovely little cakes. She was definitely getting one of those, or maybe two, depending on how little they were.

One of Leliana's agents met them at the gates and advised that the Templars had arrived. It seemed the people of Val Royeaux thought they needed protection from the Inquisition. Eve groaned, thinking that this was not a good sign.

They kept walking towards the city when a noblewoman who had been walking towards them suddenly let out a frightened little screech and quickly backed away. So far, Val Royeaux was not living up to Eve's expectations. She had little love of the type of dramatics displayed by the noble, and could only hope that the woman was not the standard for Orlesians.  
"I think they might know who we are, Seeker."  
"Your powers of observation never fail to astonish me, Varric."

As expected, it didn't go great. In fact, it went badly. She was accused of murdering the Divine by a Revered Mother. Lord Seeker Lucius called the Inquisition a heretical movement, and then took the Templars out of the city, but not before a Templar had punched the Revered Mother. And to top it all off, the Chantry still refused to deal with the Inquisition.  
Really, Eve couldn't see how it could have been any worse. Well, at least she hadn't been thrown in another dungeon, so that was something.

By the time she'd returned to Haven, she had two new recruits for the Inquisition, two small cakes, and a bag of breeches. Her life was getting stranger by the minute. The new recruits consisted of a peculiar elf called Sera, and an ex-First Enchanter called Vivienne.

Apart from the cakes, which had been delicious, something good had come out of their journey to Val Royeaux: they had met Grand Enchanter Fiona, the leader of the rebel mages, who invited them to Redcliffe to discuss a possible alliance.

Back in the council room, they all stood around the now familiar table talking about whether to ally with the mages or the Templars. It might have seemed an obvious choice with Eve being a mage, but in her mind, it wasn't so clear-cut. One of the Templars in Val Royeaux had seemed very reluctant to leave with the Lord Seeker, and she could have sworn there was a plea for help in his eyes as he left. In the end, it was decided that Eve and her companions would go and speak to the mages and get an idea of how things stood with them.

She walked out into the fresh air, happy to feel the cold breeze on her skin after being crowded into the small council room for so long. Having walked around Haven chatting with a few people, which included a long talk with Leliana, Eve needed a bit of peace and quiet and made her way down to her favourite place. It wasn't a window seat in the library, mainly because Haven didn't have a library, something she sorely missed. However, she'd found a relaxing spot on a little dock that overlooked the frozen lake.

With a rolled-up blanket tucked beneath her, she sat down and enjoyed the calming scenery. No more than five minutes had passed when she heard someone approaching. Eve bit back a groan; Maker, couldn't she even get ten minutes to herself?  
"Aren't you cold?"  
She sat up straight at the sound of Cullen's voice and twisted around to watch him. He had the walk of a self-assured man who knew he could handle pretty much anything thrown at him. It was bloody sexy.  
She started to stand up, but he gestured for her to sit down again, and a moment later, seated himself next to her. Cullen didn't say anything for a minute or two, but looked out across the lake as though he was gathering his thoughts. Eve waited, with butterflies in her stomach, trying not to think about what he was going to say.

"I'm sorry I left so quickly before."  
She was a little disappointed by the comment, feeling it was anti-climactic. "No need to apologise, I know you're a busy man."  
He rubbed the back of his neck, which was something she noticed he only did when he was feeling unsure of his footing. "I was wondering if you had some free time. We still haven't had a chance to catch up."  
Eve chuckled. "Yeah, we didn't get very far last time due to my emotional outburst. Well, as long we stay hidden here then yes, I have some free time."  
And so they talked.

She found out how he'd ended up leaving the Templars, and he talked about his time in Kirkwall. Eve told him about the Ostwick Circle, and how things had ended there. By the time they'd covered every topic, the sun was sitting low in the sky.  
"How long have we been sat here?" she asked, feeling a little guilty for keeping him from his duties for the better part of the day.  
That sexy crooked smile appeared. "I have no idea. Did you have something you needed to do?" he said, suddenly concerned.

Eve shook her head. "No, I was thinking of you."  
"Were you?" His brown eyes looked particularly warm as he spoke.  
"Yes," she replied, still not realising how her previous sentence had sounded. "I know you're busy, and I've been talking your ear off for quite a while now."  
He smiled. "Don't worry about that. I made sure there was someone to cover for me. And I believe I did as much talking as you."  
With a laugh, she shook her head. "Impossible."

They sat there in companionable silence for a while watching the sun dip below the horizon. A cold wind blew down from the hills and Eve shivered.  
"I guess that's the sign for us to go back," Cullen said as he stood up.  
He reached a hand down to her, and as she clasped it, a memory sprang to mind of the last time they'd done this. It seemed he recalled the moment too, because his eyes flickered to her wrist, searching for, and finding the scar.  
"It's healed well," he said.  
Eve nodded as she got to her feet. "Have your scars healed too?"  
"Of course, some are barely visible now." He sounded a bit confused by the question.

"Those weren't the ones I meant, Cullen. I was talking about the ones that hurt you here," she placed a hand lightly over his heart, "and here." Reaching up, she laid her other hand gently against his temple, her fingers brushing against his hair.  
His withdrawal was immediate and he stepped back from her, hard eyes glittering angrily. "I don't want to talk about it." Then he turned and walked away.

"Okay," she whispered to the empty space where he'd stood. Bending down, she picked up the blanket and walked back to the camp, trying to think of various ways in which she could get through the defences he'd built around himself. In the end, Eve decided that if he was going to talk about what happened to him then it would only be to someone he felt comfortable with, and she wanted to be that person.


	23. Chapter 23

**Decisions**

The next day, Eve set off early for the Storm Coast and returned a week later with more people recruited to the Inquisition. One such person was a Qunari called The Iron Bull. Although technically, she hadn't actually recruited him, he had offered himself and his band of mercenaries, the Bull's Chargers, to the Inquisition... for a price, of course.

Meeting a Qunari for the first time had been something of a shock to Eve. She'd stared at Bull, noting his height and width, and the fact that he didn't wear a shirt. Of course, in her eyes, he didn't compare to Cullen, but Maker's breath, he had some nice muscles.

Bull had become a regular companion when they went out on journeys, which, she told herself, had nothing to do with him being shirtless... well not much. Spy or not, he was funny and easy to talk to, and it wasn't long before he joined Varric and Cassandra in becoming close friends of Eve. She'd also recruited a Grey Warden called Blackwall; he seemed a nice enough fellow, although she'd noticed that he tended to become a little vague and twitchy whenever she mentioned the Grey Wardens. She knew, from Solona, that there were certain subjects they couldn't discuss, but this guy just didn't want to talk about the Wardens at all.

The day after they'd returned to Haven, she sought out Cullen. It was obvious that he'd retreated behind his wall in an effort to keep her at bay, but she kept the conversation simple. They talked about the weather, the new recruits he'd received, and the agents who'd joined up. After her third visit, he started to show signs of thawing and within a couple of weeks, they were having regular conversations about everything except what really mattered. But Eve wasn't concerned; he had bottled up his pain for so long and kept such a tight rein on his control, that she knew he wasn't going to open up after only a few weeks. She was just happy that they were spending time together.

A week or two had passed since meeting Fiona in Val Royeaux, and Eve, along with Bull, Cassandra, and Varric, decided it was time to take the Grand Enchanter up on her invitation. As usual, things didn't go quite as planned. When they arrived in Redcliffe, one of the Inquisition scouts explained that no one was expecting them. The group went to the Gull and Lantern tavern, where Fiona corroborated the fact that she'd never met them. Varric summed it up perfectly. "This is some weird shit."

Before they could try to make sense of this revelation, Fiona revealed that she and her rebel mages had now allied themselves with a Tevinter Magister. Eve stared at her in disbelief, before giving into her anger. "So, let me get this straight: you pushed for a vote of independence for mages because you wanted your freedom, but then you signed yourself and those following you into slavery?! Maker's balls, woman, does that sound even remotely like freedom to you? Do you have any idea how many people died because of your actions? And you don't even honour their deaths by sticking to your beliefs, but instead, you sell out to a Tevinter Magister. You bloody-"

At this point, Bull stepped in and wrapped a large hand around Eve's mouth. "Sorry, boss, but you're sounding really angry there, and I think you've forgotten we're in a room full of mages, most of whom are now looking seriously pissed off."  
Her eyes flitted around the room, confirming what Bull had told her. With an effort, she reined in her temper and patted Bull's hand to let her go.  
"Are you calm, boss?"  
She nodded, and his hand was taken away.

Fiona was doing her best to defend her actions, and Eve was debating how quick they could get out of the inn when the Magister himself entered. The smile on his face was as sweet as syrup, but there was a glint in his eyes which told Eve that this guy couldn't be trusted. He invited her to take a seat to discuss the terms of hiring the mages.

They hadn't even gotten around to negotiations when his son, Felix, was taken ill. The man slumped against her, and she felt the sharp edges of a piece of paper pushed into her hand. Quickly, she closed her fingers tightly to hide the note, although she needn't have worried. The Magister had eyes only for Felix and was quickly ushering him out of the room, ordering Fiona to follow him. Drawing close to her friends, she discreetly read the message to them. Cassandra suggested caution, and the possibility of a trap, echoing Eve's own thoughts on the matter.

With that in mind, they headed to the Chantry in Redcliffe. The first thing she saw upon pushing open the door was a mage battling demons from a rift. They immediately joined the fight, and soon the demons were dead and the hole was closed. The mage looked at Eve's hand then lifted his gaze to her face.  
"Do you know how it works?"  
"Er..."  
"You don't, do you? You just wiggle your fingers and boom the rift closes."

Well, that was true, but it sounded worse when he put it like that. She decided to ignore the comment and instead asked, "Who are you?"  
"Ah, where are my manners? Dorian of House Pavus, a mage from Tevinter."  
"So, you're a Magister?" Eve hoped he hadn't heard Cassandra's comment about not trusting him because he was from Tevinter. Maker! She really had no tact at all. But then that was one of the things Eve liked about her. Cassandra was always upfront about how she felt.  
"Suspicious lot your friends."  
Eve silently cursed, realising he obviously had heard the comment.  
"And no. Let me say this once. I'm a mage from Tevinter but not a member of the Magisterium. I know you Southerners use the term interchangeably but honestly that just makes you sound like barbarians."

Dorian then went on to explain the strange magic that Magister Alexius had been using and how it could tear the world apart. Considering the world was already in danger of that particular catastrophe, Eve felt that anything which could speed up the process was bad.  
Felix eventually showed up and provided some useful information about a group that his father worked for - a band of Tevinter mages calling themselves the Venatori. Eve had a feeling they were going to be trouble. Dorian departed, signalling the end of the meeting, and the group returned to Haven to discuss the new turn of events.

Once again, everyone gathered in the Council room and by the end of the meeting, Eve's head was spinning. For some reason, it was up to her to make a decision about whether they allied with the Templars or the Mages in order to gain the help they needed to permanently seal the breach.

Walking down to the dock, she wished there was an option of taking on both factions, but neither Leliana or Cullen had thought that would work considering the bad blood between the two parties. Spreading the blanket, she sat down to contemplate the matter. After fifteen minutes of some furious debating with herself, she still hadn't come to a decision. She had, however, given herself a headache.

"A copper for your thoughts?" Cullen had somehow managed to sneak up on her, which showed just how lost in thought she'd been.  
"You can have them for free," Eve retorted. "They're giving me a bloody headache."  
She felt the warmth of his body as he sat down next to her. "Still can't make up your mind?"  
Shaking her head, she fidgeted with the fringe of the blanket. His presence wasn't really making it any easier to think, although, admittedly she was feeling a little more relaxed since his arrival.  
"I hope you won't take offence at this, but I thought you would have immediately recruited the mages."  
Eve sighed. "And perhaps if they hadn't signed themselves over to a Magister, I might have done just that." She thought for a moment, and then added, "Actually, no I wouldn't have."  
"Why not?"  
"There was a Templar in Val Royeaux. He didn't look happy about the turn of events, and when he left, I could have sworn he looked back for help. My instinct tells me he's a good man, and someone once told me to always trust my instincts."  
"A sound piece of advice," Cullen said.

Eve wondered if he'd still think that knowing that the advice had come from a Desire Demon. Best not to mention that part. She thought of Dorian, and then the Templars. Something - instinct again, she supposed - told her that the Templars urgently needed help. Perhaps, when the breach was closed, they could contact the mages again and see if there was a way to free them from the contract.

Eve stood up, and Cullen looked up at her. "You've made a decision?"  
"Yeah. Come on, let's walk back to the Chantry. We need to get moving on this as soon as possible."

It's safe to say that the time Eve spent at Therinfall Redoubt would be remembered as one her most terrifying experiences. Corrupted Templars, a murdered Knight-Vigilant, and an Envy Demon. The vile creature somehow managed to get inside Eve's mind, and told her, in a smug voice, that once it knew everything about her, then it would kill her and take her place in the Inquisition.

The demon assaulted Eve's mind with horrific visions of what would come to pass once it was in her shoes. She felt nauseated at the possible future it had shown her, but the worst part, and what was nearly Eve's undoing, was watching nightmare-Cullen get his throat cut. That awful image wouldn't leave her, even after the demon had been killed and the Templars brought on board, it still haunted her.

On the bright side, she'd managed to acquire a new friend or two in that whole mess. Firstly, there was Cole, a strange young man who had some unusual abilities. Neither Cassandra nor Cullen were happy when he suddenly appeared on the table in the council chambers, but he wanted to help and they needed every ally they could get. The other person was Ser Barris, the Templar who had informed Cullen as to where the order could be found, and the same man she'd briefly met in Val Royeaux. At the time she'd thought him a good man; after working with him in Therinfall Redoubt, she knew he was.

She was glad to put Therinfall Redoubt behind her, and instead, turn her mind to more important things, such as closing the breach once and for all. As Eve walked towards the Temple of Sacred Ashes, she wondered how this was going to work. Drawing power from the mages was something she understood but from Templars? That was a whole new ball game.

However, the time for worrying was over, because they were back at the destroyed Temple. She noticed that the corpses were now gone, and guessed they had dissipated into dust. Closing her eyes, she took a moment to picture Cullen's face and remembered his words as she'd prepared to leave for the breach. He'd told her to take care in that rough way he sometimes had. For an instant, Eve had thought he'd been about to say more, but then Cassandra had shouted of her, and the moment had been lost. She only hoped she would get a chance to see him again.


	24. Chapter 24

**A Victory and an Attack**

Eve walked up to the massive hole in the sky and immediately her hand responded with a flicker of green energy. It seemed eager to get going, which was more than could be said for herself. Cassandra looked confident, but there was a touch of concern in her hazel eyes.  
"Templars!" She shouted to gain their attention, and then Solas took over with the instructions. "Focus past the Herald. Let her draw from your power."

Eve was disappointed with the vague instructions, having hoped for something more detailed. A recollection of how much this had hurt last time caused her body to tighten in expectation of more pain. Realising she wasn't going to get any further instructions, she exhaled and lifted her hand. The mark crackled, the stream of energy connected, and the pain kicked in. It didn't feel like she was getting much help from the Templars. Where was this power they'd-

"Oh, Maker!"

A surge of power hit Eve like a bolt of lightning. It flooded her body, rushing through her veins. The pain was forgotten, and she pulled harder on the breach. Makers breath, but this was incredible, and a little frightening. She felt like she could close a hundred such breaches. The vibration running along her arm was getting stronger, and there was a high-pitched whine which was growing louder.

A large green pulse shot into the sky; there was a split second of stunned silence and then the shockwave hit. Eve was lifted on a huge wave of energy and flung backwards. The landing wasn't too bad because, once again, her padded backside came in handy. After a moment to catch her breath, she managed to get to one knee and focused on the feel of the sharp rocks to help fight the urge to pass out.

A hand landed on her shoulder, and Eve looked around into the very relieved face of Cassandra. The Seeker smiled and looked up at the sky. Eve followed her gaze and smiled at the sight. It had worked! A loud cheer went up from those gathered and she found herself joining in.

They returned to Haven and found that celebrations were already underway. Eve was clapped on the back so often that she was worried there would be permanent damage to her spine, also her fingers were starting to feel bruised from the many vigorous handshakes. Eventually, she managed to retreat a safe distance from what had turned into a boisterous and loud party, with drinking and dancing.

Cassandra managed to find her. "You did well today."  
Eve nodded her thanks but added, "I wasn't alone in closing the breach."  
She smiled, "True. I suppose we should just enjoy the celebrations and be thankful that it's closed."  
Eve was about to answer when a hand rested on the small of her back. "Excuse me, Cassandra, but I need to borrow the Herald."  
The Seeker inclined her head, "Of course, Commander. I'll speak to you later, Herald." As she walked off, Eve thought she heard the woman murmur, "Much later, I suspect."

Cullen was silent as they walked, but she kept catching little glances thrown her way. "Did you want to talk about something, Commander?"  
They were walking past the Chantry, and at the side of the building, there was a small area, too little to be called an alley. As soon as he saw it, he dragged her there and she found herself in his arms, his hand tenderly lifting up her face.

"You look all right."  
Eve thought she was bad at flirting, but Cullen had her beat.  
"How are you feeling?"  
She chuckled at the realisation that his comment wasn't a description of her looks but her health.  
Laying a hand on his arm, she said, "I'm fine, Cullen. I even managed to stay conscious this time."

A warm smile curled his lips and his hand cupped her face as a more serious look entered his eyes. Then his fingers were sliding into her hair. Eve was feeling a little breathless as he dipped his head, leaning in slowly, as if unsure of the reception he would receive. His lips were so close she could feel the warmth of his breath brush against her own mouth.

In the distance, she could hear what sounded like a rumble of thunder as their lips drew closer. Then a shout of alarm rose throughout the camp. The voice was urgent, panicked and could not be ignored. There was no time to apologise or curse, they just started running. One of Cullen's soldiers caught up to him and filled him in on the details.

A massive army marched on Haven.  
Under whose banner?  
None!  
None?

Confusion reigned for a moment, but Cullen didn't falter. He was barking orders at the soldiers pulling them together into a cohesive fighting unit. Suddenly, there was a bright flash and a loud thud that shook the large wooden doors of Haven. Everyone seemed to hold their breath and a moment of silence followed. Then a tired voice spoke, "If someone could open this, I'd appreciate it."  
Eve's head shot up as she recognised the voice as belonging to the Tevinter mage, Dorian. She ran to the gates and pushed them open.

"Ah, I'm here to warn you. Fashionably late, I'm afraid." Dorian staggered a little, and Cullen caught him. "Might exhausted, don't mind me," he said as he straightened up. "I came to tell you what happened to the mages of Redcliffe; you're not going to like it. They are under the command of the Venatori, in service to something called the Elder One."  
He pointed up to the top of a mountain. "The woman is Calpernia, she commands the Venatori. And that is the Elder One."

Eve turned her gaze to where his finger pointed and could see the outline of a slim woman. Standing next to her was something monstrous in size and shape. In addition, below them was a massive army of mages marching towards Haven.

Eve turned desperate eyes towards Cullen. "Give me a plan. Anything!"  
His face was a mask of grim determination. "Haven is no fortress. If we are to withstand this monster, we must control the battle. Get out there and hit the force. Use everything you have!"  
He turned to the soldiers behind him and shouted instructions. Then pulling his blade free of its sheath he faced the enemy and yelled. "Inquisition, with the Herald. For your lives, for all of us!"

Looking around, Eve found that Cassandra, Varric, and The Iron Bull were already at her side. With a loud battle cry, they charged forward. It was a difficult fight protecting those who manned the trebuchet, but eventually, the massive siege weapon fired, and then they were told to get to the other one, which was having problems. Eve hoped they didn't expect her to fix the thing.

It broke her heart to know that she hadn't been able to save the rebel mages, but the sorrow was shelved for later as she focused on the main task, which was to save as many of the people as possible.

Reaching the second trebuchet, Eve could see the problem straight away - there was no one around to work it. Everyone else was busy fighting, so she ran up and started turning the wheel as she'd seen the other team do. She cursed it, thinking that the bloody thing could have done with some oiling because it wasn't moving very well. Although, the problem could also have been due to the fact that she lacked the muscle.

For a moment, she debated shouting of Bull, but seeing that he was knee-deep in Venatori, and seemed to be enjoying himself, she went back to grunting and twisting the wheel. Once it started moving, she found it wasn't too hard to keep it going. A fireball flew past, scorching her clothes, and she turned the wheel faster, realising how close they were to being overrun.

She could see the large catapult was fully pulled back now, but she had no idea how to set it off. Then, spotting a lever, she moved quickly towards it but found her path blocked by a Venatori. Impatiently, Eve let loose a bolt of lightning which stopped him in his tracks. He twitched, jerked, and stumbled back, unwittingly hitting the lever and setting off the trebuchet. He was in the act of climbing back to his feet when a crossbow bolt hit him square between the eyes.

Eve shot Varric a grateful smile and then turned her attention to the path of the massive rock. It slammed into a mountain directly above the relentless force still bearing down on Haven, and with a thunderous roar, the thick, previously undisturbed snow rushed down towards the enemy below. It gathered speed, along with any rocks and trees that lay in its path. This landslide was not going to be deterred by anything or anyone.

Cheers went up as the enemy was swept away in the devastating wave. She felt a pat on the back and looked around to see Varric grinning from ear to ear. However, the victory was short-lived. Another roar sounded, this one ear-splitting and frightening. Spinning around, her jaw dropped at what she saw. A dragon. A bloody big, black dragon.

"Run!" she screamed. As she put her own advice into action, Eve remembered Solona telling her about Alistair's words that had become synonymous with the Grey Warden. Now she understood what Alistair had meant when he'd said that swooping was bad.


	25. Chapter 25

**Escape  
**

A quick glimpse over her shoulder showed the dragon diving low towards the trebuchet. A stream of red energy poured from its gigantic maw, and the siege equipment exploded. What, in the Maker's name, was it spitting out? She'd heard of dragons shooting out fire, ice, even electricity, but nothing like this.

In the distance, Eve could see Cullen holding Haven's gates open and shouting for people to get inside. They stopped briefly while Bull helped Harritt get into his home, and she took a moment to look back on the devastation caused. Where the dragon's breath had hit the ground, there were wide furrows gouged into the earth which glowed a sickly red. She knew of only one substance that had the same colour. The damn dragon was shooting out red lyrium!

"We need everyone back to the Chantry! It's the only building that might hold against that... beast!" Cullen climbed the stairs then looked back to Eve. "At this point just make them work for it!" She nodded as he moved away.

The dragon flew over Haven, and the red lyrium spewed from its mouth again. Buildings exploded and flames lit the night. The group moved as one, running up the stairs into the main populated area. A cry for help sounded and Eve ran over to a burning building. Of course, the damn door was stuck.  
"Bull, I need some help over here." He punched the man he was fighting and quickly joined her. With a swing from his mighty axe the door crumbled and she ran in. Seggrit, the merchant, was trapped under rubble, and after a struggle, she managed to pull it off him. Running out into the night, she promised herself that if she got out of this mess alive then she was going to freeze Seggrit's balls for his ungrateful comment.

Another scream could be heard above the crackling of flames, and leaving the others to take care of the Venatori, she ran to the next burning building. After dragging Flissa to safety, Eve was off again when she heard more cries for help.  
Minaeve and Adan were trapped near large clay pots that were burning and stunk of oil. It was a close call, but she managed to free them before everything exploded. With the researcher and apothecary freed, she was running once again, after hearing more shouting. Outside the doors of the Chantry, Threnn, the Quartermaster, was fighting off Venatori, with more closing in.

Bolts of electricity flew from Eve's staff, and she breathed a sigh of relief as Cassandra, Varric, and Bull caught up and joined in the fight. With the enemy temporarily cleared, the door to the Chantry was yanked open by Chancellor Roderick who began ushering people in. The man staggered and Dorian caught him. "Brave man. He stood against a Venatori," the Tevinter mage said.

Eve nodded that she'd heard, but she couldn't deal with that, not when there were so many other lives at stake. They needed a way out of this and her brain was drawing a blank.  
Cullen strode forward. "Herald, our position is not good. That dragon stole back any time you might have earned us. There has been no communication, no demands – only advance after advance."  
"There was no bargaining with the mages either. This Elder One takes what it wants. From what I gathered in Redcliffe, it marched all this way to take your head," Dorian said, as he helped Roderick into a chair.  
"Great, who knew being so popular would be such a pain in the ass. So, how do I stop him?"  
Dorian chuckled. "And you were off to such a promising start with the landslide. If only the trebuchets were still an option."

Cullen had been deep in thought but lifted his head at Dorian's comment. "They are. If we turn the last of them to the mountains above us..."  
Eve raised a brow, then decided his statement was shocking enough to add another brow. "To hit the enemy, we'd bury Haven!"

Cullen nodded. "This is not survivable now. The only choice left is how spitefully we end this."  
Eve scrubbed a hand through her hair, not happy with the mass suicide option. "There must be another way."  
Dorian was in agreement with her. "Well, that's not acceptable. I didn't race all the way over here to have rocks dropped on my head."

While he and Cullen were having a discussion about the merits of dying and not dying, Eve noticed that the Chancellor was trying to speak. She walked over and pulled out a healing potion, thinking the poor man must be in a lot of pain. Stomach wounds were never good. But, as she drew closer, she heard him saying something about a path.

Turning quickly, Eve hushed Dorian and Cullen so that she could hear Roderick better. The dying man whispered to her details about a secret path. She couldn't help but think that Roderick was right when he said that Andraste must have shown it to him because this was the miracle they needed.

"What about it, Cullen? Can we make it work?"  
There was a gleam of hope in his eyes now. "Possibly, as long as he can show us the path." Then a shadow crossed his face. "But what about your escape?"  
Eve looked down at the floor, unable to meet his eyes. She had a feeling escape wasn't going to be an option for her, and wished that they'd been able to have at least one kiss. But, she knew people didn't always get what they wanted.

Sensing the tension, Dorian spoke softly. "Perhaps you can surprise the Elder One."  
She lifted her head and gave him a slightly tremulous smile. "Perhaps."  
Cullen shouted for everyone to follow the Chancellor, and as Dorian helped the injured man to his feet, Roderick turned to Eve. "Herald, if you are meant for this, if the Inquisition is meant for this, I pray for you." It was obvious from the gasps of pain that accompanied each word that it cost him to say that.  
She took his hand. "Thank you."

A few soldiers ran past her, and then Cullen was back. "They're going to load the trebuchets for you. If we are to have a chance, if you are to have a chance, let that thing hear you!"  
She nodded and turned to leave when his fingers curled around her forearm. "Come back to me, Eve." His eyes held hers for a brief moment drilling home the message. Then he released her and followed Roderick. She glanced down at her arm, still feeling his fingers there.

"C'mon, Boss. Let's go kick some ass."  
Eve grinned at Bull, and the four of them walked out into the cold air, no longer crisp but polluted with hot smoke. Vengeance boiled in their veins as they strode forward to meet the first wave of enemies. By the time they had reached the trebuchet, blood covered their armours, some of it their own.

Eve ran to the piece of siege equipment and once again started turning the wheel. This time it moved a little easier, but her efforts were hindered by the constant appearance of enemies. Maker's breath, they were like annoying flies and she wished she could just swat them away. Thankfully her friends were doing a pretty good job of keeping them off her.

She was close to getting the trebuchet ready when Fiona showed up. In the dark, it was hard to make out her expression. Did she feel sorrow for her decisions, or was she angry that the Inquisition had left them to their fate?  
Eve wanted to tell her to stop this madness, to gather her people and join them, but the powerful spells Fiona threw their way told Eve, in no uncertain terms, that her chance of recruiting the mages had long since passed.

It was over quite quickly, and as the life ebbed from her body, Eve shook her head sadly before returning back to the siege equipment. A couple of more twists and she would be-  
An explosion rocked the earth and sent everyone soaring through the air. The breath left Eve's lungs in one great _whoosh_ as she hit the ground. Padding or not, that had really hurt! Laying motionless, she tried to remember how to breathe while wondering whether she'd broken something. It was the thought that she needed to check on her friends that got her moving.

Slowly, she climbed to her feet and came face to face with a monster right out of a nightmare. His flesh had been torn apart and seemed to be held on his body with the help of what looked like red lyrium. And Maker, he was tall! Seven or eight feet at least.  
She backed up looking around for any of her friends and hoping that she wasn't alone with this creature. A powerful roar reverberated through her bones and she turned to find herself facing the massive dragon. Well, she definitely wasn't alone anymore. She stopped backing up and sent a less than holy thought up to the Maker about his crappy sense of humour.

Then the creature walked forwards, an orb gripped in his hand. Eve's mark flared and suddenly there was a connection between the orb and her hand. She gritted her teeth as agony ripped through her limb. He talked about the mark, about his plans that she'd spoiled. Of course, Eve was broken up about that.  
She told him that he didn't scare her.  
He told her, she was lying. Knowing he was right, she wanted to kick him in the balls for his smugness.  
He told Eve to kneel before him.  
She told him to fuck off and decided that probably wasn't the best choice of words, considering the circumstances.

He grabbed Eve's wrist and lifted her off the ground, to the point where her legs were dangling in the air. It felt like her shoulder was being wrenched from her arm socket, and she fought to bite back the scream trapped in her throat. She had time to hope that the others had managed to get away, and then she was thrown against the trebuchet.

There was a thud when her head hit the wood, although she barely noticed the additional pain considering she hurt everywhere.  
"You've ruined it with your meddling," he snarled.  
Eve smirked, feeling rather smug about screwing up his plans. Unfortunately, her triumph was brief. Fear became the emotion which took front and centre again as he calmly told her that he was going to kill her. Seeing an abandoned sword, she quickly grabbed it, then wondered why she'd bothered, seeing as she'd never used one before.

Backed up against the trebuchet, Eve wondered how she was going to escape this, and finally came to the gloomy conviction that she wasn't. Cullen's face flickered through her mind, calming her, yet also upsetting her because she knew they would never share a kiss.

Turning, Eve looked in the direction he'd be travelling and saw a red flare light the sky. It was the most beautiful sight she'd ever seen. They were clear of Haven, and now she could get out of there. Discreetly searching the area, she was unable to see any of her companions and could only assume that they'd made it out.

Slowly, she inched towards the lever, and after telling Corypheus he talked way too much, she kicked it hard. Taking a second to note that a mountain was coming down on Haven, Eve then ran for her life.


	26. Chapter 26

**Hope Renewed**

Eve's lungs felt ready to burst but there was no time to rest. The booming sound in her ears, loud enough to drown out the scared hammering of her heart was a reminder of that. She hadn't taken the time to see where she was heading, intent only on getting away from the avalanche bearing down on Haven. With a sense of urgency, Eve scanned her surroundings hoping to find a safe place to hide, and her gaze alighted on a boarded-up entrance. With no idea of where it led, but knowing that it couldn't be any worse than being buried under a ton of snow, she adjusted her direction and headed for her only chance of survival.

The noise behind her was now deafening as the avalanche drew closer. Digging deep inside, she found a small spurt of energy, and with legs pumping she jumped at the wooden boards just as the first lumps of snow brushed at her heels. Eve hit the wood hard, there was a cracking sound and then she was falling.

She woke up in a patch of melting ice and quickly tried to stand. This resulted in a long drawn out groan and a few choice swear words. When the dizziness stopped, she tried again, going much slower this time, and after a few false starts eventually got to her feet. Holding her aching head, she looked around the desolate cave, but seeing nothing of interest, she started walking in the hope of finding an exit. But, as she continued through the dark and dreary tunnels with no sign of a way out, despair washed over her and she started running. However, this only served as a reminder of the injuries she'd incurred, and she stopped, worried that she was going to pass out due to the pain.

After what seemed like an age, she spotted a light ahead and quickened her pace. With only fifty yards between her and the exit, she suddenly found her path blocked by the appearance of three Despair demons. She swore loudly; one would have been bad enough, two would have been worthy of some swearing, but three was just taking the piss. But then, without any conscious thought on her part, the mark flared up and suddenly the demons were evaporating quicker than morning dew on a hot day.

Eve stared at her hand for a moment or two, but she wasn't in any condition to try to figure out what had just happened. She shook her head and stepped out of the cave. A blast of icy cold wind almost made her turn around and go back inside. All right, she told herself, this wouldn't be too bad. She would quickly catch up to everyone and warm herself by a welcoming fire, or in Cullen's arm. She was leaning towards the latter.

However, her optimism waned after trudging through the snow for a while and finding a campfire which was neither welcoming nor warm. It was in fact stone cold. Eve wondered if she'd done her usual party trick and fallen unconscious for a day or two. It seemed likely, but she kept walking, unwilling to die in this frozen wasteland. The blizzard and her blurring vision made it extremely difficult to see any other signs. The thought that she might be walking past them almost brought her to tears.

After an hour or so of trudging through the knee-deep snow, she wanted nothing more than to curl up and sleep. But, Cullen's face swam before her eyes and she heard his voice, "Come back to me, Eve." And, she found the strength to keep going. At some point the blizzard had died down, unfortunately, her vision was so blurred by then that it didn't really make much difference.

Trying to look on the bright side, Eve realised that she wasn't quite so chilly. But this positive thought was tempered by the possibility that it was only because her body temperature was so low that she barely noticed the cold. The journey would have been easier if the ground hadn't kept tilting up towards her. Somewhere in her brain, she knew that this was because of her injuries, specifically the head wound, but she chose to believe that it was because the snow was so deep.

Another campfire, and... was that some heat she could feel? Bending closer, her hand hovered over the remains and she saw a peek of red as embers flared. Feeling the first bloom of hope in what felt like an age, she struggled on and eventually reached the top of a slope. For a moment she thought she was hallucinating because scattered in the valley below was a multitude of tents lit by the warm welcoming glow of campfires. But after rubbing her eyes, the scene was still there and she knew that she'd made it.

The adrenaline quickly left her body and she sank to her knees, barely conscious.  
"Thank the Maker, she's alive." Cullen's voice swept over her like a soft blanket, then his arms wrapped around her and she managed to lift a hand to his face, feeling the stubble brush against her fingers. "Thought I'd never see you again," she mumbled.  
The last of her strength dissipated and she collapsed against him. Vaguely, she was aware of being lifted, of strong arms holding her tightly. "I've got you, Eve."  
Curling herself against his warm body, she smiled before slipping into unconsciousness.

The first thing she heard upon waking was the advisors arguing. Eve pushed up onto her forearms in an attempt to see what was going on. Maker, this wasn't like the heated discussions they'd had in the council chambers - this was a full-blown argument fuelled by fear and worry. When all the angry words had been shouted, they moved away from each other, their faces tired and pale. The lives of all those who had survived Haven rested on their shoulders, and the lives lost weighed heavily on their hearts.

She went to sit up and was told by Mother Giselle to rest. The Chantry mother spoke well but it was difficult for Eve to see the wisdom in her words. It all seemed hopeless. Eve stood up, staggered, and grabbed a tent pole to steady herself. Hating to see her advisors torn apart, she searched her mind for something to say, something to ease the tension and offer some solace. However, her brain was groggy and refused to co-operate.

Then, the sweetest sound she'd ever heard filled the uncomfortable silence. Mother Giselle began to sing in a low melodic voice.  
 _"Shadows fall and hope has fled.  
Steel your heart, the dawn will come.  
The night is long and the path is dark.  
Look to the sky for one day soon the dawn will come."_

Slowly, a transformation began to take place within the camp. Heads were lifted and small smiles tentatively played across lips. Leliana's light voice was heard, a stark contrast to Mother Giselle's low tones, but they harmonised beautifully together. One by one, Eve watched the people of Haven unite in song, and then Cullen joined what had now turned into a choir of sorts.

She stared at the Commander, surprised and a little weak-kneed. On top of the stunning good looks, the sexy as sin voice, and the muscled body hidden beneath his armour, he could sing too!  
Eve was enjoying the song and in particular his performance when she realised that people were kneeling... in front of her?! This Herald of Andraste thing was getting out of hand. Feeling uncomfortable, she took a step back just as the song ended.  
Mother Giselle's hand steadied Eve. "An army needs more than an enemy; it needs a cause."

Whilst pondering the meaning of her statement, Solas approached. "A word."  
She raised a brow at the abrupt command, but followed him as he walked to a quiet snow-covered hill, and with a graceful gesture lit a nearby torch. Eve was a little mesmerised by that simple wave of the hand. It's not that she couldn't have lit the torch just as easily, but Solas made it look as natural as breathing. He was obviously a very gifted mage, and she could understand why he was so comfortable in the Fade. A man of his talents and confidence would have little to fear.

She turned her attention to the conversation as he explained that the orb Corypheus carried was an ancient Elven artefact called a foci. It seemed that this plain unadorned orb had caused the explosion. She understood his concerns about the possibility of there being some backlash towards the Elves if this information became known and readily agreed to recover the orb if the chance arose.

He became silent, and she glanced over at him. Solas looked deep in thought, and then there was an infinitesimal movement of his head as if he'd reached a decision.  
"By attacking the Inquisition, Corypheus has changed it. Changed you _. S_ cout to the North. Be their guide. There is a place that waits for a force to hold it. There is a place where the Inquisition can build and grow."  
"That sounds perfect. And you know how to reach this place?"  
He gave a nod and smiled. "Let them know that we'll be leaving here tomorrow."  
She returned the smile, "All right."

It didn't occur to her at that point to question why he'd chosen to discuss the matter with herself rather than one of the advisors. For now, she was just glad to know that they had somewhere to go. After making her way down to the camp, she relayed what Solas had said. Word spread quickly, and a buzz of excitement replaced the fragile hope that had settled over the people after the uplifting song.


	27. Chapter 27

**Skyhold**

Eve yawned as exhaustion caught up with her. She left the advisers to sort out the details and went back to the area where she'd originally woken up, only to find that it was now full of people talking as they packed their possessions away. Rubbing a hand over her face, she looked around at the numerous tents scattered everywhere, and the bustle of people moving around. It seemed that sleeping might not be a possibility. She decided to check out the tents at the edge of the camp, hoping that it would be more peaceful there.

She'd only taken a few steps when a hand rested on her upper back. "You're looking a little lost." Chuckling, Eve looked up at Cullen. "Bull told you about me getting a bit turned around in the Hinterlands, didn't he?"  
That sexy lopsided smile appeared. "No, but I'll be sure to ask him for that story." His hand urged her forward, and she found herself being steered through a maze of tents and campfires.  
"How are you feeling now, Herald?"

She was a little disappointed at his return to using the ridiculous title; personally, she preferred it when he used her name. They stopped outside a tent, and Cullen pulled back the flap, then gestured for her to enter.  
With a doubtful glance around, she said, "I don't think I should just take someone's tent."  
He smiled. "You're not. It's my tent, and I'm offering it to you."  
Of course, this caused her mind to come up with various scenarios all of which made her blush. He stepped closer, which really didn't help. "You're exhausted and you need somewhere quiet to sleep. This..." he gestured to the tent, "fits that requirement."  
That hadn't been where her mind was going, but there was no denying that she was tired. "Thank you, Cullen. Where will you sleep?"  
"Don't worry, I can bunk with the soldiers for tonight. That's if I even get a chance. There's a lot to do if we're going to be ready to leave tomorrow."

Feeling guilty at leaving the arrangements to him and the other advisers, she straightened up. "I'm not that tired. I can help if you tell me what needs doing."  
His eyes widened slightly, then he grabbed her hand and pulled her into the tent. "Eve, do you have any idea how close to death you were when we found you?"  
As he immediately continued talking, it seemed safe to assume that he didn't actually expect an answer, which was good, because she had no idea what to say.  
"You've been through an ordeal that no one else I know of could have survived. Without you, we would not have escaped the attack on Haven. So this is the plan: you are going to get some sleep, and let your advisers deal with the small stuff."

"Well, there's not much to say when you put it like that," she said while trying to smother a yawn. He smiled and moved to the entrance of the tent. The flap was in his hand when he turned around. "Thank you for coming back." The words were barely a whisper, then he ducked his head and left.  
With a smile, she stripped off her coat and boots, then climbed between the covers of the bedroll. His scent surrounded her and she breathed in deeply, memorising it and imagining him near as she fell asleep.

The next day, they set out to reach the place Solas had spoken off. After hours of trekking over mountains, Eve suddenly found the elven mage by her side, a secretive smile on his face. She raised a questioning brow, but he just inclined his head indicating that they should keep walking. When they reached the peak, she understood the smile. Nestled in the Frostback mountains was a massive, sprawling castle. Solas stepped forward, a small smile on his lips. "Skyhold."

The first night, everyone just bedded down where they could find space. The next morning, Eve left her room, rubbing her hands together in glee as she prepared to explore the castle. However, her senses immediately went on the alert when she spotted Cullen, Cassandra, Leliana, and Josephine huddled together talking animatedly. Her wariness increased when the conversation stopped as soon as they saw her and the four exchanged glances.

Everyone moved away, except for Cassandra, who beckoned her over with a smile in her eyes. Eve didn't trust that look and wondered if there was time to run. They started walking, and Cassandra looked around at the bustle of people. "They arrive daily from every settlement in the region. Skyhold is becoming a pilgrimage. If word has reached these people, it will have reached the Elder One."

The Seeker made her way up some stone steps and Eve kept pace with her. "We have the walls and numbers to put up a fight here, but this threat is far beyond the war we anticipated."  
At the top of the first flight of stairs, Cassandra stopped and turned to Eve. "But we now know what allowed you to stand against Corypheus. What drew him to you."  
Eve instinctively looked down at the mark. "Yes, he wanted this." She waved her hand. "And now that it's useless he wants me dead." Seemed pretty simple to her.

"The anchor has power, but it's not why you're still standing here."  
Eve agreed wholeheartedly, it was her rather speedy legs that had gotten her of that situation. However, as Cassandra continued to talk, it became obvious that their thoughts were not running along the same path.  
"Your decisions let us heal the sky. Your determination brought us out of Haven. You are the creature's rival because of what you did. And we know it. All of us."

They did? Eve wasn't sure where this was leading, but the urge to bolt off in the opposite direction was growing stronger. They were nearing the top of another flight of stairs when she spotted Leliana. A blade lay across the Spymaster's outstretched arms and her head was bowed.  
Eve wondered what, in the Maker's name, was going on?  
Cassandra provided the answer. "The Inquisition requires a leader. The one who has already been leading us."  
Eve's ever-mobile brow lifted in some confusion because the Seeker couldn't mean her, right? Cassandra's steady stare made it clear that was exactly what she meant.  
And just to clarify the matter, she stated, "You."

Eve stared at her with a dazed expression; she was finding it difficult to figure out which emotion was most prominent: anxiety, fear, or confusion. Unable to choose, she settled for all three. Hearing some murmuring below, she turned and saw that there was a multitude of people gathered in the courtyard. Smiles decorated expectant faces, and standing at the forefront was Cullen. His eyes met Eve's and he smiled and inclined his head slightly as if to say, 'You've earned this.'

She looked back to Cassandra. "Perhaps I didn't hear you correctly. A mage... at the head of the Inquisition?"  
"Not a mage. You."  
It seemed to Eve that Cassandra was missing the point, so she specified, "I happen to be a mage."  
"I will not pretend no one will object, but times are changing. Perhaps this is what the Maker intended."  
With the Maker's sense of humour, Eve could well believe that. Cassandra gestured to the sword, and Eve took a hesitant step forward.  
"There would be no Inquisition without you. How it will serve, how you lead: that must be yours to decide."

Staring at the massive sword, she slowly reached for it. As her hand curled around the grip, she looked to the crowd below and could see only happiness in their faces. Drawing in a deep breath, she made her decision; if this was the path chosen for her, then she would lead to the best of her ability.  
With the sword grasped in her hand, she gazed at the glinting metal. "Corypheus will never let us live in peace. He made that clear. He intends to be a God, to rule over us all. Corypheus must be stopped."

"Wherever you lead us." Cassandra's words were solemn. She looked down and sought out Josephine, and her voice rang out loudly, "Have our people been told?"  
Josephine smiled. "They have, and soon the world."  
Cassandra's gaze travelled to Cullen. "Commander, will they follow?"  
Cullen strode forward and turned to face the people. His charismatic voice asked, "Inquisition! Will you follow?"  
A loud cheer answered him.  
"Will you fight?" Cullen lifted a hand inviting them to cheer louder, and they did.  
"Will we triumph?"  
The cacophony of cheers swelled.  
"Your leader! Your Herald! Your Inquisitor!"  
As he spoke the last word, he drew his sword, turned and raised it towards Eve. His eyes met hers, proud and smiling. A burst of enthusiasm made her lift the sword high; a promise to those gathered that she would do what she had said. The roar of the crowd echoed through the Frostback Mountains.

A few days later and Eve was still trying to get used to being addressed as Inquisitor; honestly, she'd barely adjusted to being called the Herald. What she really wanted was to hear Cullen use her name again, but trying to get him alone was proving to be difficult. The last time she'd managed to have a chat with him was shortly after she'd been made Inquisitor. Everyone had been busy trying to get Skyhold into shape. He'd been in the courtyard, giving out orders and dealing with a seemingly constant flow of messengers.

Eve had debated about going to talk to him, but then he'd seen her and smiled. She'd walked over, worried by the exhaustion in his face.  
"We set up as best we could at Haven, but we could never prepare for an Archdemon, or whatever it was." He rubbed a hand across his neck in an effort to relieve the tension. "With some warning, we might..."  
She'd placed a hand on his arm. "How many did we lose?"  
"Many of our people made it out. It would have been much worse without your help."  
"And without yours. You did everything you could, Cullen."  
A small lopsided smile had played around his lips. "Thank you, Inquisitor."  
Returning the smile, she'd been about to leave, but he'd caught her hand. "When you stayed behind... you could have... I will not allow the events at Haven to happen again."  
Eve had squeezed his hand. "I'm glad you made it out safely, too."

Since then, apart from meeting him in the war room, she'd had no chance to talk to him.


	28. Chapter 28

**A Walk on the Battlements**

One night, Eve woke in a cold sweat, Cullen's name on her lips. Trembling, she lay in bed trying to clear the terrible images from her mind. The nightmare had consisted of the worst times in her life: the horrors of Uldred's rebellion mixed with the attack on Haven and the horrifying scene at the Temple. There had even been a moment from her time in solitary, and just for good measure, her time with the Envy Demon had been thrown into the mix, and throughout it all, her mother's voice had been whispering words of hate.

That recollection made her climb out of bed and walk onto the balcony. Tilting her head back, she let the cool breeze brush away the remnants of the nightmare while looking at the stars that were shining brightly in the clear, night sky. But even that lovely sight couldn't dispel the fear completely.

"Sod it." Dressing quickly, she made her way outside, shivering and pulling her coat tighter as a gust of wind blew around her. She wandered over to some stairs that led to the battlements and was about to ascend when a familiar voice stopped her. "Who's there? Identify yourself!"  
"Ah, it's me." She rolled her eyes at the unhelpful reply. "It's Eve," she amended.

By that time, Cullen was already close enough to see that for himself. Taking her foot off the step, she turned around to face him.  
"Maker's breath, Eve. What are you doing walking around at this time in the morning?"  
"I couldn't sleep. I thought a bit of fresh air might help."

He looked at her for a moment and then climbed the stairs. Eve was about to follow when her gaze landed on his ass. The leather trousers stretched over his firm backside with every step he took. It was a stunning sight, and she felt flushed with the heat of arousal.  
"Are you coming?" he shouted down.  
She thought there was a very distinct possibility of that happening, especially if he climbed up a few more flights of stairs. Feeling flushed, and wishing for another gust of cold wind to cool her heated skin, she pushed aside the naughty thought and followed him.

When she reached the battlements, she asked, "For that matter what are you doing up?" His eyes wouldn't meet hers. "I'm on night duty."  
"Have you forgotten that you were working all day, too?"  
"No, of course, I haven't forgotten. It's just that..."  
"It's just that you can't sleep either, right?"  
He chuckled, "I did get some, but yes, once I'm awake I find it difficult to fall asleep again."

With an understanding nod, she said, "I have the same problem, sometimes. Although not as often as you, I suspect."  
He rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. "It's not as bad as it used to be, and... and I think maybe you should return to your quarters and get some sleep."  
Eve wondered what he was really going to say as she shook her head. "No, I'm still not tired. Do you want a silent companion while you continue your night duties?"  
He gave a little snort of laughter. "Silent?"  
She slapped his arm, her expression indignant. "I can be quiet when I want to be."  
"Is that so? You were the chattiest one in the Circle."

"That's not true. What about Andrea? She was always talking."  
He seemed to consider the matter. "Was she the one with the pink hair?"  
"Yep."  
"Maker, how did she get it that colour?"  
Eve laughed. "She had a bit of an accident while trying to mix a potion."  
He let out a shout of laughter, which he quickly muffled with a hand over his mouth.

They made their way along the battlements while talking. He stopped and turned Eve so that she found herself looking at the most incredible sight. Stretched out below was the frozen lake surrounded by snow covered mountains, and the silver of the moon highlighting the whole scene.  
"It's beautiful," she whispered.  
"Yes."  
There was an underlying warmth in that one word and she turned to find his eyes fixed on her rather than the landscape. Feeling breathless, she watched as he moved towards her. The cold stone pressed against Eve's back as he leaned forward, placing one hand on the wall behind her, his head dipped...  
"Commander?"

Maker's balls, not again!

He cursed, turned, and stalked towards the soldier stood a few feet away. "What?!"  
"Oh, sorry, Ser. I just wanted to make sure it wasn't an intruder."  
Cullen's jaw twitched. "All right. Keep up the good work. Why don't you check around near the gardens? I've got this area covered."  
The soldier's eyes flickered over to Eve, then straight back to Cullen. "Yes, Ser. I'll head there right away."

She sighed, another moment lost, and who knew how long it would be before they reached that point again. She gave him a small smile, "It's all right if you-"  
Without a word, he strode towards Eve, cupped her face in his hands and captured her lips in a hungry kiss.  
After the initial gasp of surprise, she sighed softly and slipped one hand into his hair. The kiss deepened into something passionate and needful. They broke apart, cheeks flushed, chests heaving. "I'm sorry... that was... um... really nice."  
"That was perfect."  
"Oh." That crooked smile appeared. "Good."

He leaned in again and their lips joined in a slower, sensuous kiss, each taking their time to taste and explore. Eve moaned as his hands smoothed over the curve of her hips; he answered with a groan - his hands weren't the only ones doing some exploring. They broke apart, breathless and grinning like fools.

"I've wanted to kiss you for a long time; actually, from the moment I first saw you," Eve admitted with a blush. He chuckled and his thumb slid gently along her bottom lip. "I've wanted to kiss you for some time too. Longer than I care to admit."  
She smiled teasingly. "Oh? Do tell."  
His mouth moved close to her ear. "Since that night you watched me in the library."

If he heard her swift intake of breath, he didn't show it, but carried on talking. "I'd just been told I was being transferred to Kirkwall. Part of me rejoiced at leaving the tower, but there was something pulling at me to stay there. I couldn't figure out what it was. So I went for a walk to clear my head, and found myself in the library by your window seat. I'd only been there a minute or two when you entered."  
"I've always wondered; how did you know I was there?"  
"I knew your scent off by heart, and I felt calmer, something that I'd come to realise only happened when you were near me. That's when I knew just how much I cared for you. I thought it was best that I leave; you would have been too much of a temptation for me, and I wasn't in the best frame of mind back then."

His arms tightened. "I wasn't going to say anything that night, but I couldn't deny myself one final look at you. I heard the break in your voice but I kept walking. Then I heard you sob, and I almost went back to you. That was the first time I wanted to hold and kiss you. But I knew it wouldn't have worked out, not with how things stood, not with the way I was."

He pulled back and lifted her face with one well placed finger under her chin. "Oh, Maker! I'm sorry, Eve. I didn't mean to upset you." His thumbs wiped away the tears.  
"You didn't," she said with a hiccup. "It's just that I never knew you had feelings for me, and now you're here, and I'm in your arms, and..."  
"So... happy tears?"  
She nodded and chuckled. Then his lips were on hers, and the tears were forgotten in the pure joy of the moment; of finally being in the arms of the man she loved.

As the first rays of dawn lit the sky, they deemed it time to return to their own quarters. Cullen watched her walk down the stairs. "That's a very nice view."  
She turned quickly, staring at him in surprise, and then chuckled at the mischievous gleam in his eyes. She had no idea that the Commander could be so naughty.

"I thought you were a gentleman." Eve adopted a dignified tone.  
"Oh, I am, but it seemed only fair, seeing as you were staring at my backside when I climbed the stairs earlier."  
"I... ah... you noticed that did you?" A flush covered her cheeks. "Well, you do have a very nice bottom."

He walked down the stairs and pulled her into his arms. "Do you have any idea how adorable you are when you blush?"  
Of course, that just made her blush even more. Which, in turn, led to more kissing. She was in the middle of trying to climb his body while teasing his tongue with hers when they found themselves being addressed.  
"Good morning, Commander. Nice to see you," Leliana cleared her throat, "up so early. I'm sure I'll see you at the war table later, Inquisitor." Her soft chuckle drifted away as she left.

There was a soft flush to his cheeks, and Eve stroked her thumb over it. "I think there might be some talk about us. Is that..." she faltered, knowing how private he was. "Is that going to be a problem?"  
He leaned into her hand. "I admit I'd rather keep my... our personal life private. But I'd be more upset if there was nothing for them to talk about."  
She smiled. "So would I."


	29. Chapter 29

**Taking a Break**

Upon returning from the Fallow Mire where she'd rescued a group of Inquisition soldiers from an idiotic Avvar leader, and recruited a much more sensible man from the same tribe, she'd gone straight to her quarters. Having washed and changed into a clean set of clothes, she checked her desk and found a message from Cullen. It was brief, stating only that he wished to talk to her as soon as it was convenient.

A feeling of panic rose within her. She'd thought everything was going well between them, but this curt missive seemed to suggest otherwise. It was with some trepidation that she walked along the battlements to his office.

Bracing herself, she entered and closed the door. Cullen was standing, leaning over the desk, one hand rubbing the back of his neck while he stared intently at a wooden box containing various paraphernalia.  
"Is this a bad time?"  
He lifted his head, and for a brief moment, she saw the desperation in his eyes. He blinked, and it was gone, replaced by a shuttered expression. "As leader of the Inquisition, there's something I must tell you."  
Her brows drew together at the distant and anxious tone of his voice. "You can tell me anything, Cullen." She waited, trying to look calm, but her heart hammered against her ribs.  
"Right. Thank you."

There was a pause and his hands fidgeted before eventually resting on the pommel of his sword. "Lyrium grants Templars their abilities. It controls us as well. Those cut off suffer, some go mad, others die."  
He'd moved back to the desk, hands flat against the surface, eyes fixed on the wooden box. "We have secured a reliable source of lyrium for the Templars here. But I no longer take it."  
"You stopped?" The shock was evident in her voice. She hadn't even known that was possible, having assumed that it was a permanent part of their life.  
He gave a short nod. "When I joined the Inquisition. It's been months now."  
Eve's brain did a quick rewind, stopping at the point where he'd mentioned dying. With her heart in her throat, she said, "Cullen, if this could kill you..."  
"It hasn't yet. After what happened in Kirkwall, I couldn't. I will not be bound to the Order or that life any longer. Whatever the suffering, I accept it."  
He straightened up and tore his gaze from the box. "I would not put the Inquisition at risk. I've asked Cassandra to watch me. If my ability to lead is compromised, I will be relieved from duty."

Cullen watched her, a worried frown creasing his face as he waited for her reaction.  
"Are you in pain?" But looking at his pale face, the shadows under his eyes, Eve already knew the answer.  
"I can endure it."  
She took a step towards him, but he backed away. "I should have told you before I kissed you. You should know what you're getting into."  
"Cullen," she said chidingly as she took another step towards him. "This doesn't change how I feel about you. It just confirms what I've always known: that you're a strong man, one with the courage to fight an addiction."

Another step forward and his thighs hit the edge of the desk, causing him to sit down. She moved between his knees and cupped his face with both hands. "I love you, Cullen. I have from the moment I first set eyes on you." Her fingers toyed with the curls at the nape of his neck. "I know you're a man of integrity, loyalty, and courage. And I know you have room in your heart to love even after everything you've been through." She leaned in closer. "What you've told me today has only strengthened how I feel for you."

His hands moved to her waist in a firm hold, and his forehead rested against hers. "Inquisitor..."  
She interrupted him. "Eve."  
A crooked smile tilted his lips. "Eve." The word whispered from his lips. "You should know that this isn't going to be easy. I can't always sleep at night; I'm restless and have mood swings. It might be better if..."  
Tears stung her eyes. "Don't tell me to leave you. Not now. Not when we finally have a chance to be together." Her voice broke on the last word.

He surged forward, his hand sliding into her hair and kissing her with bruising passion. She choked back a sob, unsure of whether this was a kiss goodbye. When they broke apart, she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and buried her face into the curve of his neck. "Don't leave me again. I don't think I could bear it," she whispered.  
Cullen stroked a comforting hand over her hair. "I won't, Eve, I promise." He pulled back so that he could look at her. "I love you, too, and I'm yours for as long as you'll have me."  
Seeing the truth in his eyes, she smiled. "Always."

A week later, Eve returned from one of her many missions, and while dismounting, she saw Cullen leaning on the battlements watching. A smile played around her lips as he beckoned her up to his office.  
"You go on, Inquisitor, I'll take care of the horse."  
She turned and saw Dennet leading the cream stallion away. "No, you've got enough to do. It won't take me long to-"  
Dennet chuckled. "I don't think the Commander is a patient man. Go along now and don't keep the fellow waiting."  
She flushed and thanked the horse-master before quickly climbing the steps to Cullen's office.

He met her at the top and pulled her into an embrace. "Maker, I hate it when you're away. I'm worried you won't come back one day."  
She ran a hand over his brow, trying to sooth the anxious lines. "I will always fight to come back to you." He kissed her hard, his arms tightening around her.  
When they came up for breath, he said, "Can you get away for a few days? I'd like to take you somewhere."  
"That's a date, Commander."

The next morning was dry and sunny when they left, but as the day progressed the weather worsened. Looking at the heavy clouds covering the sky, Cullen said, "I think we'd better find somewhere to shelter."  
"Are there any inns around?"  
"No. Damn it, I shouldn't have suggested a shortcut, otherwise we would be closer to the Imperial Highway and might have found somewhere to stay."  
Eve chuckled. "I had no idea you could predict the weather."  
He glanced at her, and seeing the twinkle of humour in her grey eyes, a smile curled his lips. "Perhaps I can predict the weather, and just wanted to see you in wet clothes."

Her eyes widened but he saw a flash of arousal mixed in with the surprise. "You... that's... um, well..."  
Seeing the blush colouring her cheeks, he pulled his horse up close, snagged her coat and pulled her in for a brief kiss. "You really are adorable when you blush."  
"And you are a rascal."  
He laughed, and they set off again, keeping a look out for someone to hide from the oncoming rain. About ten minutes later, Cullen pointed to a rock formation. "There's a cave over there. That should keep us dry."

Eve gave a nod, but her palms felt sweaty and her heart was beating a little faster. Fighting back her fear, she hoped that it was a spacious cavern. They dismounted, grabbed their supplies, and after covering the horses, they entered the cave. Cullen put down his pack and told her he was going to get some wood.

She barely heard him as her eyes took in the small space, and with the way the rocks were positioned, the outdoors could barely be seen once they were inside. She blew out a breath, telling herself she could do this. She'd managed to get through the caves at the Storm Coast, although to be fair, she'd kept a ball of flame lit until they'd been able to find torches, and those caves had been more spacious. Her eyes darted around the cramped area, noting the fading daylight. Oh Maker, it was going to be dark soon.

"Eve?"  
She stifled a scream and spun around to face Cullen. Pasting a smile on her face, she said, "Sorry, you startled me."  
He put down the wood and moved towards her. "I can tell when someone's terrified. Is it the small space or the dark?"  
"Both."  
"I have to admit, I'm not too great in enclosed spaces myself." He looked around and grimaced. "It hasn't started to rain yet, so we still have time to find somewhere to pitch the tent."  
"Thanks. I think that might be better."  
Cullen looked a bit sheepish. "I'd love to say I'm doing it just for you, but, honestly, I had no idea it was quite so cramped. I don't think I'd fare any better."  
She chuckled and grabbed her pack, then quickly exited the cave, Cullen right behind her. They both breathed easier once they were back outside.


	30. Chapter 30

**The Coin**

They decided to lead the horses, rather than waste time uncovering them again, and soon came across a perfect spot to put up the tent. The first drops of rain fell as the last peg was pushed into the ground. The two ducked inside, and after lighting a lantern, Eve shook out the bedrolls while Cullen prepared the meal. Soon, they were comfortably seated and the conversation was desultory while they ate.

Rain drummed against the canvas, almost obliterating Cullen's next words. "Have you always been afraid of small, dark spaces?"  
She stared down into her cup of water. "No, not always." She gave him an impish smile. "I used to be a bit of a sod when I was younger."  
Cullen's brow raised. "I'm guessing something changed that because you seemed well-behaved when I was there."  
She gave a nod and the smile slipped from her face. Cullen moved closer and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her back against him, his hands clasped and resting against her stomach. She laid a hand on his and told her story.

As the tale progressed, she felt his hands tighten beneath hers, and looking down, she saw that his knuckles had gone white. Leaning back, she glanced up at him and saw a nerve twitching in his jaw.  
"Cullen, are you all right?"  
With a sharp exhalation, he gave a nod. "Just trying to understand why they thought it was a good idea to throw a young child in solitary."  
"It wasn't meant to get that bad, and wouldn't have if the kitchen-hand hadn't been so negligent. I don't think he liked mages."  
Cullen's fingers twined with hers. "But still, the punishment seemed unnecessarily harsh for what had started out to be a harmless prank."  
"Maybe, but as harmless as it started out, it did nearly end in tragedy. I think Greagoir just lost his patience with us."  
He pressed a kiss to the crown of her head. "So, how did it all end?"  
"Adir came to the rescue and removed me from the cell. I heard from Solona that Irving was none too happy and gave the Knight-Commander a dressing down, mostly for failing to provide me with a candle and a book."  
"I always liked Adir, but I never knew I owed him so much for saving your life."

Eve turned slightly, sitting sideways and resting her legs over one of his. "What about you? You said you weren't comfortable with confined spaces, too."  
She saw the shuttered expression drop into place and knew that his fear started during Uldred's rebellion. She curled a hand around his neck, teasing his hair. "It's all right, Cullen, I understand."  
He gave her a grateful smile. "Thank you. Maybe one day I'll be able to talk about that, but not today."  
Smiling, she pressed a kiss to his lips. "I'll be there whenever you're ready."  
Dipping his head, his hands sliding through the soft strands of her hair, he tenderly kissed her. She lost herself in the feel of his lips moving against hers, the strength of his arms holding her close, and the pressure of his hands against her body. Finally, they moved apart, both feeling aroused, but neither ready to take the next step. Instead, the two curled up together, wrapped in each other's arms, content to be loved and held.

They set off early the next morning, glad that the rain had been replaced by a warm, sunny day. They reached their destination in the late afternoon.  
"Where are we?" Eve asked, looking around at the peaceful spot. A large lake was surrounded by greenery and wildflowers, and a small wooden dock overlooked the whole scene.  
"We're just outside of Honnleath." Cullen took her hand and led her onto the dock. "I used to come here quite often when I was younger." He looked at her, a wry smile playing around his lips. "I love my siblings, but they were a noisy bunch back then."  
Eve chuckled. "How many do you have?"  
"Three in total; one brother, Branson, and two sisters, Mya and Rosalie."

She looked up at him. "I'd like to meet them one day, perhaps when this mess with Corypheus is over?"  
He turned his gaze from the lake and met her eyes. "I'd like that too. I also have a nephew, who is apparently a bit of a handful, though, with Branson as his father, that's not really surprising."  
She chuckled, enjoying the relaxed atmosphere, both having temporarily left their worries and responsibilities behind at Skyhold.

Eve leaned her head against his shoulder. "This was a great idea."  
He smiled. "I thought we could do with a break away from everything, and I wanted some time alone with you, without worrying about a messenger or soldier interrupting us."  
Recalling the numerous occasions they'd been interrupted, she laughed. "Considering how large Skyhold is, it's surprising how people keep managing to find us."

"I also wanted to give you this." He opened his hand to reveal a small, silver coin. "My brother gave it to me the day I left for Templar training. He told me it was a lucky coin, and... well, I'm still alive, so I think he might have been right."  
She was touched by the gesture, but said, "Cullen, I can't take this when it obviously means a lot to you."  
"Your safety means much more to me. Please, Eve, you're out there facing danger nearly every day. It would make me feel better if I knew you had this with you."  
Remembering his words from a few days ago, she relented. "Thank you, Cullen. I'll always keep it on me."

He pulled her close and kissed her, only drawing back when a rumble of thunder sounded overhead. "Maker, we're not having much luck with the weather, are we?"  
Eve looked up at the darkening sky. "Actually, I love a good thunderstorm."  
Cullen grinned. "So do I, though I usually prefer to be indoors when they're happening."

A streak of lightning lit the sky. "Yeah, I don't think the tent is going to cut it this time," Eve said.

They returned to their horses and were soon on the Imperial Highway. "I'm fairly certain there used to be an inn around here somewhere," Cullen said.  
Another flicker of lightning illumined the sky and both riders took a firmer grip on the reins, holding their horses steady.  
"We need to find shelter. Start looking for a barn; that might be easier to find than an inn as there are a lot of farms in this area."

Eve nodded and kept a lookout for anything that might house them for the night. A few minutes later and the heavens opened. Eve laughed as the rain plastered her hair within seconds. She looked at Cullen. "Looks like you're going to get your wish after all."  
"I am?"  
A saucy smile curled around Eve's lips. "Yep, you're going to see me in wet clothes."  
His cheeks flushed as he laughed. She grinned. "Now who looks adorable when they're blushing?"  
"No, no, not adorable!"  
"Cute?"  
"No, that's even worse."  
"Sexy?"  
His cheeks burned a little brighter. "Well, that's definitely an improvement."  
"Still adorable though," she said with a chuckle.  
"You're a minx, Eve."

It was some twenty minutes later when they found a large barn. Finding it unlocked, they quickly entered. "Maker, I look like a drowned rat," Eve said, glancing down at herself.  
Personally, Cullen thought she looked even sexier than usual, with her chestnut hair laying wet and tangled across her shoulders, and her clothes sticking to her body. He was pulled from his reverie by Eve's suggestion that they get the horses rubbed down and settled for the night.  
"I think you should get out of those clothes first."  
Eve felt a little flustered but grinned and stared at Cullen, who upon realising how his words had sounded looked extremely flushed. "Andraste's flaming knickers, I meant... damn it, Eve, stop looking at me like that. You know what I meant."

She continued to chuckle as she removed the horse's saddle. "I'll get changed soon, but these poor fellows are soaking and need some care first." Her horse snickered in agreement and flapped his lips at her.


	31. Chapter 31

**The Storm**

With the horses settled, Eve and Cullen checked through their packs to see if anything had managed to avoid the pelting rain. Thankfully, the bedrolls and blankets had been wrapped up in the tent so they were mostly dry, however, their change of clothing was as soaked as the ones they were wearing.  
With a slightly heightened colour, Eve grabbed a blanket, saying, "I think we're going to be wearing these."

She wandered over to a pile of haystacks and hastily stripped down then tied the blanket around her chest as though it was a towel. She stepped out and Cullen stared. "Where's your... um, bra?"  
"Cullen, bras are great, but they're not waterproof. Now, go and get changed before you catch a cold."

He disappeared behind the same haystacks and Eve set about getting their food ready. She found the little tin of coffee and stared longingly at it. Then she had an idea, and after spooning the coffee into the cups, she filled them up with cold water, then curled her fingers around them and let her magic flow. When the cups were hot enough, she put them down and stirred.

"Is that coffee I can smell?"  
"Mhm," she said, turning around to greet him, and then nearly swallowed her tongue. Cullen had tied the blanket around his waist and she couldn't seem to drag her eyes away from his bare chest.  
"Eve?"  
She started. "Oh right, the coffee." She handed him a cup, saying, "It's hot..." Her gaze ran over his chest again. "So bloody hot," she mumbled.  
"No, it's not too hot, it's just right."

Eve bit her lip, trying to hold back a laugh as she handed him a plate of food and settled herself on a haystack to eat her own dinner, trying not to stare when Cullen sat next to her. Overhead the thunder rumbled, and through the planks of wood, the occasional flashes of lightning could be seen. "I think it's getting closer," he said after one loud crash of thunder had died down.  
"Yeah, I don't think we're going to get much sleep tonight."  
Cullen's warm gaze flickered over her body. "Yeah, I think you're right."

She looked up from her food and met his gaze; a surge of arousal sparked between them. Her plate dropped to the floor as they reached for each other and their mouths joined in a heated kiss. His hand ran down her body, pulling her harder against him as he laid her down on the haystack. She moaned longingly as his body covered hers, her legs parting to cradle him. The kiss ended and his lips moved down her throat, kissing and tasting her skin. Eve's hands stroked over his back and slipped beneath the towel to take a firm hold on his ass.

"Fuck." His hips jerked and she could feel the proof of his passion pressing against her thigh. With open-mouthed kisses, he caressed her collarbone, then taking hold of the blanket, he slowly pulled it aside. "So beautiful," his breath whispered across her breasts causing her back to arch.

His fingers felt hot against her skin as he stroked the underside of her breasts and moved slowly towards her aching nipples. Gasping, she pushed up into his touch as he teased the areola, tightening the skin until it pebbled. The soft strokes were driving her crazy; it felt as though all her sensitive nerve endings were gathered in each nipple.  
His mouth hovered over one taut bud, warm breath teasing her flesh.  
"Please," she whispered. Wet heat encompassed her nipple and her hand convulsed in his hair. "Oh shit! That feels so good."

The pressure of his lips and tongue were slowly driving her to unknown heights of arousal and her whole body arched up as the need to feel him between her legs increased. She watched through hooded eyes as he moved over to her other breast and once more that wet heat soothed the aching need she felt. She trembled at the erotic sight as his fingers smoothed over her other breast, sliding easily in the slick layer of saliva.

His hand moved down her body, fingers teasing with light brushes against her skin until he skimmed across raised flesh. Eve tried to cover the scar with her hand, but Cullen took hold of her wrist and gently moved it away. "Don't. You don't need to hide anything from me." He pressed a tender kiss to her lips. "You're beautiful, Eve."  
"Even the scars?"  
"Especially the scars. They remind me of your courage, and of when I first started falling in love with you." His thumb ran lightly over the area.

"Thank you," she whispered against his lips and he closed the distance, kissing her hard.  
There was a teasing tug to the waistband of her knickers, a light stroke along her pubic bone, then his fingers slid between her legs. His head rested between her breasts as a long drawn-out groan fell from his lips. "You're so wet. I love how responsive you are."  
She lifted his head, looking into honey-brown eyes. "I think that has something to do with the man touching me."  
"You've never had this reaction before?"  
Smiling, she said, "No, you're my first."  
A blaze of carnal desire burned in his eyes and he surged forward and captured her lips in a bruising kiss. Pulling back a little, Cullen suddenly looked unsure. "I've... I've never done this either."  
"You were doing an excellent job before you stopped."  
He grinned and his fingers started moving again, exploring her sex, tracing the wet layers, then he rubbed her clitoris and she cried out as pleasure surged through her body. "Oh fuck! Cullen..." Her words drifted off, the sentence unfinished as she became consumed with burning desire. She lifted her hips as he pulled her knickers down and off.

Cupping her face, his weight on his arm, he watched her expression as he slowly slipped a finger inside. Gritting his teeth at the tight heat and the pure pleasure on Eve's face, he started thrusting, hanging onto his control by a thin thread. Her lithe body undulated beneath him, breasts moving enticingly, muscles clenching around his finger. He added another, felt her nails dig into his back and his cock throbbed in response. Soft, sexy sounds drifted from her parted lips, pushing his desire up a few more notches.

Eve grabbed his blanket and tugged so hard that he nearly fell off her. He was thankful for his training that had honed his reflexes so that he quickly managed to regain his balance. He looked at Eve, who smiled sheepishly. "Sorry, I'm feeling a bit impatient." Laughing, he leaned down and took her lips in a slow, loving kiss. Drawing back, he searched her eyes. "Are you ready?"  
She grinned. "I think you know the answer to that."

He guided himself to her entrance and slowly thrust inside, pushing steadily forward until he was buried fully in her wet heat. His hands gripped at the hay as he waited for her to adjust. Understanding his hesitation, she smoothed a hand over his back, gently telling him, "You can move, Cullen."  
Her hips lifted to meet his as he started to thrust and her hands settled on his ass, feeling the flex of muscles. As the speed increased, their breathing turned into panting gasps and sweat covered their bodies. Her legs hooked around his hips and one hand moved to his hair, gripping tightly as her desire spiked.

The rain drummed incessantly on the roof, and thunder rumbled and cracked overhead as though matching the passion of the two lovers below. She buried her face in the curve of his neck, her tongue sliding out to taste salt and the pure masculine flavour of Cullen. His hands moved down to her ass, pulling her harder against him as his hips pumped faster.

She could feel something blossoming inside, waiting to break free. "Cullen..." His name left her lips on a gasp.  
He turned his head, nipped at her lobe, and whispered, "I've got you, love."  
The climax hit her with the force of a crashing wave. Her body arched, then curled around Cullen as muscles tightened.

Cullen grunted as her tight sex massaged him, but he managed to keep thrusting, prolonging her orgasm for as long as possible. Then he felt the telltale signs of his own approaching climax and pulled out. He sat back on his heels and took hold of his cock, stroking furiously. His eyes widened as Eve's hand covered his. She straddled his legs, wrapping one arm around his neck to steady herself. Cullen took his hand away and groaned as Eve's fingers curled firmly around his erection.  
"Harder," he growled in a husky voice, his eyes fixed on the erotic sight.

She followed his instructions, tightening her hold while her hips moved seductively against him. He gasped as her wet sex brushed against his balls. It was the last straw; he cupped her face and kissed her passionately, moaning as his seed spilt between them.  
Seeing that some of it had landed on her breast, she scooped a little onto her finger and tasted it. Cullen wrapped his arms around her. "Maker, you're going to kill me doing things like that."  
She chuckled. "But what a way to go."

They stumbled over to the bedrolls, grabbing the blankets as they went. Words of love were whispered between them until they fell asleep, not even the storm having the power to break through their satiated exhaustion.


	32. Chapter 32

_I want to thank Junryou for giving me permission to use her idea for the chess game scene. FF net won't let me include the link to her amazing comic (Sacrifice), but it can be found on her Tumblr site. Just type in her name, junryrou, then .tumblr and end with .com ;)_

 **Sacrifice**

As each month passed, the Inquisition grew stronger – a force to be reckoned with. The carefully laid plans of Corypheus were slowly being destroyed. The biggest victory to date had been the destruction of the demon army that Corypheus had tricked the Grey Wardens into creating. Although, considering the cost of that battle, perhaps the use of the word victory was a poor choice.

Fighting the Grey Wardens had been horrific as she'd always considered them to be heroes - brave men and women who had given up everything in order to protect Thedas from a Blight. And now, because of her decision, another warden had been lost. Although she hadn't had a chance to get to know Stroud that well, she'd come to like and respect him, especially after he'd shared a couple of stories about Solona.

Eve had been grateful that Solona was away on a personal mission and therefore not mixed up in the whole mess. The only consolation that she could take away from the battle at Adamant was that some Wardens had been saved, and of course, Corypheus no longer had his army. But it was a small consolation and did little to ease her guilt.

Two days after their return to Skyhold, Eve went for a walk in the garden, intending to plant some herbs. However, her attention was captured by the sound of Cullen's voice. She followed the direction and saw the Commander and Dorian sitting in an alcove playing a game of chess. Cullen looked relaxed and a confident smile played on his lips even as Dorian jokingly taunted him.

Cullen glanced to the side briefly, and seeing Eve he stood up. "Inquisitor, I-"  
Dorian raised a brow. "Leaving are you? Does this mean I win?"  
Cullen sat back down, and Eve chuckled. "Are you two playing nice?"  
Dorian's charming smile surfaced. "I'm always nice." Then he turned his attention back to the board, saying, "You need to come to terms with my inevitable victory. You'll feel much better."  
Cullen moved a piece. "Really? Because I just won, and I feel fine." There was no disguising the self-satisfied tone nor the triumphant smile.  
Dorian held up his hands in surrender. "Don't get smug, there will be no living with you." As the mage walked past, Cullen looked at Eve, a warm smile on his lips. "I should return to my duties as well... unless you would care for a game?"  
Needing a distraction from her morose thoughts, she accepted.

They were twenty minutes into the game when Eve realised that he had her on the ropes with his most recent move. He leaned back in his chair watching the little frown between her eyes. "Let's see you get out of this one."  
Her brow arched indignantly. "You don't think I can, Commander?"  
With a lopsided grin, he said, "No, Inquisitor, not without sacrificing a piece."

The word pierced her heart and the hand she'd been reaching across the board came to a halt. Oh, Maker, that's what she'd done... sacrificed a person in order to escape the Fade. Everything around her dimmed, and all she could see was Stroud, all she could hear was his last words to her, 'Inquisitor, it has been an honour.' Her body shuddered as the memory poked at her conscience with cold fingers.

"Eve, are you all right?" Cullen asked, taking hold of her trembling hand.  
The concern in his voice pulled her back to the present, and she lifted eyes shining with unshed tears. "I... I sent him to his death."  
Cullen moved to her side, hiding her from any prying eyes. "Who do-"  
"Stroud." Her voice shook as the first tears fell.  
"What? No. Didn't you say in your report that he chose to stay?"  
She swallowed past a painful lump in her throat. "Yes... but he... I..."

Words failed her and she lifted a hand to her mouth, trying to hold back the sobs that threatened to spill forth. Cullen leaned over and placed an arm around her shoulders, holding her close and wishing he could shelter her from the horrors of the world. He felt her shoulders shake and the first muffled cry fell from her lips. She stood, blindly reaching for him, and he wrapped her up in his arms as she buried her face in his coat and wept. His hand moved to her hair, stroking in a slow, soothing manner until he felt her relax.

Eventually, she pulled back a little and patted her pockets. "Maker, I never have a hanky when I need one." A soft square of cotton was pressed into her hand and she smiled gratefully at him.  
After she'd cleaned herself up, Cullen lifted her face, and seeing the shadows beneath her eyes, asked, "When was the last time you got some sleep?"  
She cleared her throat. "It's been a day or two." Not wanting him to worry, she refrained from telling him that she hadn't slept properly since Adamant.  
"Come on, I know a way back to my office that avoids the main halls and all the nobles." He took her hand and led her over to one of the doors that lined the garden. After traversing some stairs and battlements, they finally reached his quarters. "Go upstairs and get some sleep. I'll make sure you're not bothered."  
She brushed a kiss to his lips. "Thank you." For a moment, she debated about asking him to join her but decided against it when she saw the amount of paperwork on his desk.

Two hours later, Cullen had cleared a good portion of his work and seeing that it was now dark outside, he climbed the ladder, wanting to be near Eve, but also hoping to catch up on the rest he sorely needed. Fighting the lyrium was exhausting, and yet it also made it difficult for him to sleep, and when he did, the nightmares tended to wake him.

He looked at Eve and stroked a finger gently along her cheek, feeling his heart swell with love for her. Fate, for once, had worked in his favour and thrown them both together again, and this time neither of them had to hide their feelings. After getting undressed, he climbed into bed, smiling as she rolled towards him and rested her arm on his chest. "Love you," she murmured. He pressed a kiss to the crown of her head, slipped his arm around her, taking care not to wake her, and was soon asleep.

The moon was waning when Eve was woken by a sudden movement. Thinking that Cullen must have joined her, she reached over for him, but her fingers touched a damp sheet. She opened her eyes and saw that he was sitting upright. "Cullen?"  
When there was no answer, she sat up and moved towards him. It was then that she noticed the slight tremor and a sheen of sweat covering his taut muscles. Unsure of how to help him, she placed a tentative hand on his back, not wanting to crowd him, but also letting him know that he wasn't alone.

Carefully, she moved around to face him and almost cried at the terrified expression he wore. The bedsheets were gripped tightly between clenched fists and his chest heaved as though he was trying to draw more air into his lungs. Eve could only assume that he was reliving Uldred's torture and wished the mage was alive just so she could rip his heart from his chest. Softly, she spoke to Cullen, whispering words of comfort, knowing how inane they were and yet still hoping that they helped in some small way.

This state lasted around thirty seconds or so before he abruptly came out of it. For a moment he looked disorientated and there were still traces of fear in his eyes. Eve reached out and took his hand, but didn't immediately say anything. She wanted to be strong for him, but it had been painful to see the man she loved suffering in such a way.

His hand closed around hers and she looked at him. "Are you all right?"  
"Yeah," his voice was rough. "Sorry for waking you."  
Wrapping her arms around him, her voice shaky with sorrow, she said, "You never need to apologise, Cullen. You don't need to go through this alone, not anymore."  
He held her close, his whispered word of thanks brushing against her neck. Her hands moved over his shoulders, trying to ease the knots of tension. "The nightmare..."  
His breath caught in his throat, and Eve paused, wondering whether she was doing the right thing, but, in the hope that it might help, she continued. "Was it about Uldred's rebellion?"

Cullen nodded as he pushed himself back to lean against the headboard. His eyes looked right past Eve, and she knew his mind had drifted back to that horrible event from eleven years ago. She sat quietly next to him and waited as he gathered his thoughts.


	33. Chapter 33

**Letting Go of the Past**

When Cullen eventually spoke, his voice was rough and unsteady. "I was the only one to survive out of those of us who were captured."  
She remembered seeing Adir's body nearby when she'd regained consciousness, and wanted to ask what had happened to him, but, she was fairly certain he had died trying to save her. She pushed back the memory and focused on what she'd seen before passing out. "There were three other Templars captured with you."  
He rested his head against the oak headboard. "Yes. Beval, Farris, and Annlisse." His eyes closed. "I'd trained with Farris. He was a decent man and a good friend."  
"Yeah, I remember him. He had cheerful blue eyes and a kind heart."  
Cullen's hands gripped at the sheets, showing just how painful the memories were for him.

Eve placed a hand on his, needing to offer some comfort. His eyes opened quickly, as though he'd forgotten she was there. He didn't look at her but kept his distant gaze fixed on the broken ceiling. "They were tortured first, and when that became too dull for Uldred's sadistic tastes, he had them killed. The bastard didn't even have the decency to make it quick. He let the abominations loose on them. They suffered so much, their screams..."  
A tremor worked its way through his body, and his eyes shut tightly. "I still hear them." His fingers scrubbed through his hair, and he looked restless.  
"Would a walk make this easier?" she asked, remembering how he'd been wandering around the battlements on the night they'd first kissed.

"Probably."

They dressed quickly and walked out into the cool night air. As soon as he was in the open, some of the tension eased. Cullen leaned his forearms against the thick, grey stone and put his head back letting the cold wind ruffle his hair. Eve took up a similar position next to him and waited.

It wasn't long before he started talking again. "I was confined within some kind of magical structure. The walls couldn't be weakened, no matter how hard I tried. It was..." He shifted slightly, and she saw his hand move to his throat. "It was difficult to breathe in there. He killed them all in front of me, and I couldn't do a damn thing to save them."

Abruptly, he moved away from the wall and started pacing, his fists clenching open and shut in a convulsive manner. Eve stayed where she was, not wanting to get in his way. "All that training, and for what?! Not one of my Templar abilities could break through that structure. And I tried. Maker knows, I tried! I kept trying until I was exhausted. Perhaps they kept my abilities off balance with the images-." His mouth shut so quickly there was an audible click.

He rubbed the back of his neck and appeared to be struggling with a dilemma. "Cullen, I've said this before. You can tell me anything."  
"It's just..." He sighed and walked over to her. "You remember Solona?"  
She smiled. "Of course, we still keep in touch." But at the mention of her friend, Eve now understood his reluctance to talk about what he'd seen. "Cullen, I knew you had feelings for her. I just wish they hadn't used that against you."

His face flushed. "Uldred tried to break my mind with graphic images of her. When he realised that wasn't working, he mixed sex and violence together." A shudder crawled down his spine. "My mind was filled with visions in which I killed her. A sword through the heart; my blade removing her head. One had me strangling her while we were..."  
He angrily rubbed his palms against his eyes. "Maker! They were vile and sickening. Those images still haunt me."  
Recalling what she'd been through with the Envy Demon, Eve sympathised with that part of his torture, although hers had only lasted a few minutes. His had been for two days.

"I often wondered how I'd been able to resist it all. But, after that night with you in the library, I finally understood. My feelings for you had been growing even before Uldred's attack." He wrapped his arms around her. "I'm not sure I could have withstood it if he'd used you in those same images."  
Eve leaned back and looked at him. "Yes, you would have, Cullen. There's a strong streak of goodness inside of you that keeps you from going down the wrong path. When Meredith turned on the Champion, you stood against her. After everything you'd endured, you still did what was right."

He shook his head, and muttered, "No, not always. I should have been more vigilant about what was going on in the Gallows."  
"Was it really that bad there?" She'd heard the stories, but it was hard to tell what was true and what was just scaremongering.  
He gave a nod. "One of the Templars, Alrik, wanted to start something called the Tranquil Solution."  
Eve felt a twist of fear in her gut. Anything with the word tranquil in the title couldn't be good. "What was this solution?"  
He moved away from her and his hands pressed against the wall. "He wanted to make all mages under Circle control, tranquil."  
Eve's eyes widened with shock and horror. "Maker's balls! Well, that was a bit drastic. I know blood mages were rampant in Kirkwall, but that can't justify making all the mages tranquil. Surely that's what the Harrowing is for? To test which mages are strong enough to resist a demon?"

He nodded. "Knight-Commander Meredith and Divine Justinia said something similar, and refused his request."  
Eve fought off a shiver, wishing there had been more disapproval in his voice. "How did you feel about it?"  
He turned to her, and there was a pained look in his eyes. "No, I didn't agree with it. But, I admit there were moments when I could see why he'd come up with the plan." He took a step towards Eve. "I wasn't the same after Ferelden. I distrusted mages, which only increased with each blood mage we had to deal with in Kirkwall."

After taking a minute to think over his words, she realised that it was difficult to find an argument with that. She'd been distrustful of mages herself after what had happened at the Circle. When she'd moved to Ostwick, she had been lucky enough to find herself amongst friendly and trustworthy people. He hadn't been so fortunate; instead, having to deal with numerous blood mages, abominations, and a Knight-Commander who had gone mad.

"I feel disgusted with myself whenever I think of how I was back then." There was a distinct tremor in his voice, and she closed the distance between them. "Then don't think of it. You've worked hard to break away from that person, that life."  
His hand slipped around her waist. "I've never spoken of this to anyone before. It... it feels good to let it out."  
She stroked a hand over his cheek. "Thank you for trusting me with this. I know it can't have been easy."  
His arms tightened around her and, dipping his head, his lips found hers for a slow, gentle kiss.

Later, as they lay in bed, she thought about their discussion. He still had a long way to go, but she considered this a breakthrough of sorts, and could only hope that it helped him in some way. His hand moved on her hip as he turned slightly in his sleep. Eve smiled, thinking it must have helped a little as she remembered him saying that he couldn't fall asleep again after a nightmare. Baby steps, she thought, before drifting off.  
A month passed, and the guilt from Adamant eased a little, along with the nightmares. Josephine was busy making plans to get the Inquisition invited to the Winter Palace, where they would need to stop the assassination attempt on Empress Celene.

Everything seemed to be going well, but there was a big problem looming, and it had nothing to do with Corypheus.


	34. Chapter 34

**Perseverance**

Eve had been away for a couple of weeks sorting out the situation in the Emerald Graves. Upon her return to Skyhold, she went to straight to Cullen's office in the hope of some time alone with him. However, rather than Cullen, she was met by his messenger who explained that the Commander had gone to see Cassandra. Cold fear trickled down her spine, and she quickly made her way to the Seeker's quarters.

Upon entering Cassandra's quarters she saw Cullen, but he stopped talking and left the room without meeting her eyes. There was a sinking feeling in Eve's stomach as she looked at Cassandra with a questioning gaze.  
The Seeker spoke with something of a huff. "And people say I'm stubborn. You know that the Commander has stopped taking lyrium?" Her words were sharp with annoyance, but mixed in with that was a hint of sadness.  
Eve nodded while trying to fight down the feeling of panic growing in her chest. If Cullen had gone to Cassandra, then he obviously felt he was no longer fit for command.

She knew that if his duty was taken away from him, he would have nothing left to fight for. He might keep trying for her sake, but she knew that this needed to be something he did for his own reasons. Something he could take pride in. Without the army to command, he would already feel like he'd failed.

Eve tuned back into the conversation as Cassandra continued talking, "Mages have always made their sufferings known, but Templars never have. Talk to him; if anyone can change his mind, it is you, my friend."

Managing to conjure up a small smile, she immediately made her way to Cullen's office. She opened the door and the wooden box containing his lyrium and other paraphernalia flew past her head to smash against the door.  
"Maker's breath! I didn't see you there," he exclaimed.  
She took a step towards him. "Cullen?"  
"I promised myself I would give no less to the Inquisition than what I gave to the Templars! But, I can't! I haven't!"

His hands scraped through his hair as his face contorted with anguish. He came to a stop by the large bookcase and rested a hand there. "I've asked Cassandra to find a replacement." His tone was dead and it was clear he'd already given up.  
She choked back her fear and tried to keep her voice calm and steady. "But you're doing so well."  
"I'm not!" The anger and frustration were palpable. "I should be taking it. I should be taking it!" His fist clenched and slammed into the large, heavy bookcase.

She could no longer watch as he tore himself apart, and quickly wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "You don't need it, Cullen. You've gotten this far without it, and I know you have the strength to continue to fight."  
He was silent for a minute or two, then took a step back and attempted a smile. "I need some time alone."  
"Don't give up, love. I have faith in you, and so does Cassandra."

Eve was scared of losing the man she loved, and it was on trembling legs that she left his office. Part of her wanted to run back and make sure that he was all right, but, worried that he might misconstrue it as a lack of trust on her part, she kept walking. Fighting back her fear, she walked to the library and started going through the books in the hope of finding something about lyrium withdrawal, or more specifically, a way to combat the symptoms.

After an hour of searching, she slammed her hand against the bookcase, letting out some of the frustration she was feeling. "Fuck!" Dorian had been right when he'd said the books weren't in order.  
"Well, someone seems a little on edge."  
Eve choked back an angry retort; it wasn't Dorian's fault that she was in no mood for his wit. With a mechanical smile, she tried to reassure him that she was fine but he was no fool and immediately saw through the facade.

"Is he having a bad day?" The sympathy in Dorian's voice brought a lump of emotion to her throat. She bent her head, unable to speak as she tried to force back the unwanted tears that threatened to spill.  
"Perhaps I can help?"  
Surprised, Eve looked at him, and as soon as he saw the sheen of tears, he pulled her into a hug. "Tell me what I can do."

They sat down at one of the tables and she explained that she wanted to find some way to ease the pain and tiredness that plagued Cullen. Dorian had become a close friend and Eve knew that he could be trusted not to blurt out what they'd discussed. He leaned against a wall, his face thoughtful. "Leave it with me. Go back to your Commander. I'm sure he needs you."  
She shook her head. "He said he wanted to be alone."  
Dorian chuckled. "Of course he did. He's a man, and he doesn't want you to see him in a weakened state."  
She rolled her eyes but managed a smile. "Thank you for this."  
He waved a hand, pushing aside the gratitude. "Isn't that what friends are for?"  
Eve hugged him. "You're a good man, Dorian, and a good friend." His cheeks were a little flushed when she left.

It was with some reluctance that Eve walked back to Cullen's office; even with Dorian's assurance, she still wasn't sure he would want her there. Her brow drew down as she tried to think of some way to help, then inspiration struck and she quickly turned in the direction of her quarters. After grabbing a small glass vial from the dressing table, she returned to Cullen.

Quietly, Eve opened the door, noting that the box had been picked up. Cullen sat at his desk, hands laced behind his head, eyes staring down at an empty surface. There was no sign of the box, and Eve wasn't sure if that was good or bad. At the click of the door closing, he quickly stood up and a spasm of pain flickered across his face. He staggered and his hand curled around the edge of the desk in an effort to keep himself upright.

Eve rushed forward, ready to help, but he was already straightening himself and put out a hand to stop her.  
"Cullen, let me help."  
He shook his head. "I'm fine."  
The cold sweat that covered his face and the dark shadows beneath his eyes belied his words. His hand moved to the back of his neck in a familiar gesture. "Is there something you wanted?"

She wanted to take away the despair in his eyes and ease the pains... "I want to help."  
"It will pass, and I have work to do," he said with a touch of impatience. In a dismissive gesture, he sat down at his desk and pulled some paperwork from the top drawer.  
Eve's fists clenched as her feelings of inadequacy and worry reached a boiling point. "No." She stormed over and grabbed his arm, pulling him out of the chair. "The work can wait. Right now you need to rest."  
"Eve..."  
"No, Cullen. No more arguments. Get up that ladder!" She startled herself with the forceful tone, but Cassandra had been right, he could be as stubborn as a mule, and Eve knew it was time to put her foot down.

His eyes widened, and in stunned silence, he climbed up to the bedroom. Eve joined him, and took off his coat, then started to undo the breastplate. His hand covered hers. "I... I don't think I'm up for that."  
She rolled her eyes. Men! Only one thing on their mind. Dislodging his hand, she returned to her task, saying, "We're not going to do that. Now hush, and let me get this thing off."

With his top half stripped naked and his boots removed, she told him to get onto the bed and lie on his stomach. He raised an eyebrow, opened his mouth to say something, but closed it again when he encountered a steely look in her eyes. After he'd complied, Eve grabbed the vial from her pocket, took off her jacket and straddled his hips.  
His muscles flexed beneath her. "Cullen..." she said in a warning tone.  
He turned his head slightly on the pillow. "Damn it, Eve. I can't help it. Just seeing you gets me half hard, and now you're sitting on top of me."  
it was difficult to stay focused, but she told him, "Well, try to put it out of your mind."  
He muttered something about that being impossible.

She chuckled and poured the oil into her hands. After warming the viscous liquid, she leaned forward and stroked his shoulders, feeling the knots in his muscles.  
"Hmm, it smells like you," he mumbled.  
She laughed. "It's the oil I use after I've washed my hair." Then a thought occurred to her. "Um... you won't mind smelling of this, will you? I know it's a feminine scent, but it's all I have."  
A smile curled his lips. "I definitely don't mind. It reminds me of you."

Feeling warmed by his words, Eve smiled and kept up the stroking and occasional kneading where the muscles were extra tight. Soon, his body relaxed and his breathing evened out. She softened her touch and slowed the movement of her hands. When it became clear he was asleep, Eve stopped and carefully climbed off him.

While wiping her hands on a cloth, she glanced at him and smiled at the peaceful expression on his face. Instinctively, she reached out to touch him, but quickly pulled back, unwilling to risk waking him. His hand closed around her wrist. "Don't go," he murmured. Smiling, she tugged off her boots and climbed in next to him while pulling the covers over their bodies. He drew her closer, a small smile on his lips, and soon they were both asleep.


	35. Chapter 35

**It's Good to have Friends**

It hadn't been the last such incident, but it had definitely been the worst. Eve was overjoyed when she later found out that he'd thrown the wooden box out of the window. She knew then that he was going to make it.

Whenever possible, Eve continued to meet Dorian in the library, discussing and dismissing various ways and recipes to create a potion that would help Cullen. During one such session, a dulcet voice said, "No, no, darling. You've got that all wrong." Vivienne leaned over, took the quill from Dorian's hand, crossed out a few lines, and then in her elegant handwriting, she wrote the correct amount of ingredients needed.  
Her hand briefly rested on Eve's shoulder. "I hope it helps, my dear."  
"Thank you, Vivienne. It's much appreciated," she said, quickly recovering from her shock.

On another day, Eve was walking through Solas's quarters to reach the library, when he stood up from his desk, a sheath of papers in his hand. "One moment, Inquisitor."  
"Is everything all right, Solas?"  
A smile graced his lips. "Yes, thank you. I thought this might be helpful." He handed her a sheaf of papers and went back to his desk.  
"Er... thanks." Unsure of what she'd been handed, she decided to look it over later after her meeting with Dorian. She placed the papers on the table and got out her notes. Dorian picked up Solas' neatly written papers. "What's this?" There was silence, and then a crow of delight. "Well, that certainly helps."  
She looked up at him. "What does?"  
He waved a hand. "These notes! Who gave them to you? I know they're not in your handwriting."  
"Solas handed them to me."  
"That clever little elf." He grinned and sat down, his quill working rapidly across a sheet of paper.  
"Does it help?" she asked, feeling a little bewildered by the turn of events.  
"Oh yes. Now be quiet, I need to concentrate."

Running back down the stairs, she saw Solas stand up, a wary look on his face. "Inquisitor, I hope I didn't..."  
Eve pulled him into a hug, cutting him off mid-sentence. "Thank you. Dorian says your notes are a great help."  
He chuckled. "You're very welcome."  
A couple of hours later, Dorian sat back, a thoughtful look on his face. His fingers stroked over his moustache. "We've got the recipe right, but some of these ingredients aren't going to be easy to find."  
Her shoulders slumped. "Yeah, some of them are pretty rare."  
"Don't worry, Eve. We've got this far. A few trifling ingredients won't stop us."  
She managed a smile, but couldn't subdue a pang of disappointment.

A few days later, Eve walked out of her quarters and tripped over three packages. The first had a doodle of a bee on it. She chuckled; Sera's fascination with bees was well-known. The second parcel had a few words written on it. 'I hope it helps.' That had to be Cole. The last one was marked with the symbol of Kirkwall. Varric!  
With trembling fingers, she opened the packages and found they contained large quantities of some of the ingredients they needed. She didn't know how they'd found out, but she ran to the library and waved the parcels at Dorian. "Look what I've got!"  
He chuckled and held up two more parcels. One had a raven on it, the other a small J. Leliana and Josephine.

She couldn't believe her eyes as Dorian sorted through the parcels. Between them, they had managed to gather all the ingredients. Only eight months ago, these people had been strangers to her, and yet, they had all gone out of their way to help her save the man she loved. The tears that had teetered on the edge of her lashes finally fell.  
Dorian glanced up as she sniffled. "My dear friend, what's the matter?"  
While trying to find a hanky, Eve blurted out her thoughts. He looked amazed and then laughed. "Well, of course, we're going to help you. I believe you've done as much, if not more, for each of us."  
These words did little to help stop the tears and, having finally found a hanky, she mopped at her face.  
"Now don't make me go and get the Commander. It would ruin the surprise."  
Her chuckle was a little watery, but eventually, she managed to rein in the tears.  
"Just out of curiosity, why haven't you told him about this?"  
"I didn't want to get his hopes up until we had a remedy."  
He nodded his understanding. "All right. Let's get to work."

They gathered up the ingredients and went to the Undercroft. A few minutes later, Vivienne joined them, then Solas, and finally Dagna decided to pitch in with her expertise. Eve had been happy to see Dagna, who had been a cheerful addition to the Fereldan Circle after everything they'd been through.

Leaning against a table, she glanced over and saw that Harritt was looking worried. "They're not going to blow us up, are they?"  
She laughed. "I think we're safe."  
He flinched as a puff of smoke erupted from one of the glass containers. "Are you sure?"  
Eve eyed the group nervously. "Yeah... more or less."

They worked tirelessly, and it was with a start that she noticed it was already dusk.  
"Go and get some rest, or go and see your Commander and have some fun. I'll bring the potions to you when we're done." Dorian shooed her out into the main hall. Before he closed it he called out, "So, I'm guessing delivery will be to the Commander's quarters?"  
Eve's face flushed, but she gave a nod. Maker's breath, she wondered how he had the nerve to call Bull indiscreet.  
"Then I'll be sure to knock first."  
Eve groaned and speedily ducked through the door into Solas' quarters to avoid the interested glances from the nobles.

From the walkway leading to his office, she could see him on the battlements. His head was slightly back, and Eve knew that if she could see his face, his eyes would be closed as he enjoyed the cold breeze. The nightmares had lessened, but he still had trouble with being enclosed for too long.  
"I'm glad you're here," he said without looking around. His ability to know when she was near still astounded Eve, and she chuckled as she moved into his arms.

With a happy sigh, she opened to him as he captured her lips with a delicious kiss. His arms tightened around her, and Eve's heart fluttered when he pushed her up against the wall and pressed his firm thigh between her legs. His hands smoothed over her body, coming to rest on her flexing hips. "So sexy," he murmured.  
Arousal surged through her and she dropped her head to his chest, thankful that he wasn't wearing the breastplate.

There was a discreet cough. "Ah, Commander. I do apologise for disturbing you..."  
Cullen sighed and muttered something about getting the battlements cordoned off, before turning to greet Dorian. He did it in a way as to keep Eve hidden, at least until she'd composed herself.  
"Now, don't shout at me. I come bearing gifts," Dorian said smoothly.  
Eve chuckled and peeked around Cullen's body, waving to Dorian who winked back. He then handed an ornately carved box to Cullen and left.

"Eve?" He stared at the box, a panicked expression on his face. "Is this lyrium?"  
Quickly, she moved out from behind him and covered his hands which were tightly gripping the box. "No, no, it's something to help with the pain and tiredness."  
There was a glimmer of hope in the warm brown depths of his eyes. "Is that even possible?"  
"I believe so, yes."

They went into his office, and he placed the box on the desk. His fingers ran lightly over the ornate carvings, and then he opened the lid. Inside were 28 vials, neatly stood up in little slots, all filled with the same deep purple liquid. He reached out a trembling hand for a potion, or so she thought. Instead, his finger traced a message that had been burned onto the inside of the lid: _'_ Trust in the love of a good woman to help you through the hard times.'  
"Oh." Eve was stunned, then it suddenly occurred to her that he might think she'd asked for that message to be written there. "I didn't tell him to do that. I..." The remainder of the sentence was lost when he pulled her into his arms and tenderly kissed her.

"Thank you, Eve. I can't believe you did this for me."  
"Actually, I had a lot of help. It started with only Dorian, but somehow others found out. They helped with the recipe, or with gathering the ingredients. I couldn't have done this without them."  
"It's because they care for you," he said, stroking a hand along her cheek.  
Eve smiled but shook her head. "No, it's because they care for us."


	36. Chapter 36

**A Sturdy Desk**

She perched on the desk, smiling at the flush covering Cullen's cheeks as he glanced once more at the message before closing the lid and placing the box in the top drawer. When he looked back at her, she noticed a pensive look in his eyes and took his hand. "Are you worried about taking them?"  
He met her gaze, then looked away and rubbed the back of his neck. "No, I was thinking of something else."

He was silent for a moment, and she waited, understanding by his gestures that he was feeling apprehensive.  
"This war won't last forever. When it started, I hadn't considered much beyond our survival," he said, stroking a thumb over the back of her hand. "But things are different now."  
"How so?"  
"I find myself wondering what will happen after. I won't want to move on..." He stepped closer, his hand gently cupping her face. "Not from you." There was a tentative smile on his lips, his eyes, however, held a hint of uncertainty. "But I don't know what you... that is if you..."  
"Cullen." She lifted his hand and placed it over her heart. "This belongs to you."  
His forehead pressed against hers. "As mine belongs to you."

Their lips joined in a loving kiss that took her breath away. She put out a hand to steady herself and there was a crash as her fingers knocked a wine bottle off the desk. Startled, they broke apart, spared a glance for the shattered remains, then they were kissing again. Where the first had been loving, this one was hungry and passionate.

Cullen pressed harder against her and with a sweep of his arm, cleared everything else off the desk. There was a primal glint in his eyes and Eve quivered with desire as he manoeuvred her onto the strong wooden surface. Taut muscles flexed as his body covered hers, and his hand slipped beneath her skirt, rough fingers sliding easily over soft skin. She gasped as he took a firm grip on her knickers and tore the thin ties that held them together.

"Open your shirt for me, Eve." Cullen's words, husky with arousal, whispered across her lips. With a sensuous smile, she stroked her hands down her body, moaning and arching as she brushed across aching nipples. He groaned, hips bucking, pressing her harder onto the desk while his eyes followed the trail of her fingers as they moved along the line of buttons, slowly flicking each one open. With unhurried, torturous movements, she parted the shirt, revealing creamy skin, flushed with desire, and the teasing line of her cleavage.

A carnal growl rumbled up from his chest, and his hand slipped inside the shirt, stroking over the lace of her bra. Fingers skimmed across the swell of her breasts before sliding the cups down, then his lips covered one rosy nipple. She cried out at the heat of his mouth, moving her hand to his hair and tugging with wanton need.

Her body quivered with anticipation as his hand caressed her skin, moving lower until it rested between her legs. The sensation of his fingers circling the slick, sensitive bud caused her thighs to tremble and part for him. Needing to feel his skin, her hands slipped beneath his top to explore his back, and her fingers stroked down his spine until they came to rest on the rounded curve of his buttocks.

Brushing against the stubble of his jaw, she pressed her lips against his ear. "I need you." The words, whispered so seductively, shredded the last of his control and reaching down, he unfastened his trousers. Her fingers hooked into the waistband and pulled, freeing his hard penis. Cradled between her thighs, he entered her with a firm thrust and captured her moan with a bruising kiss.

Eve's legs wrapped tightly around his waist and her hands moved over his sweat-slicked body, stroking firm muscles that flexed beneath her touch. With each hard thrust, their bodies moved along the desk until Cullen cradled her head with one hand while gripping the edge of the desk with strong fingers.

Their rapid gasps of pleasure mingled together, and Cullen knew she was close when her tight sex quivered around his cock. He increased the pace and her arms curled around his neck. "Cullen..." she whispered breathlessly, pressing her forehead against his. Whatever else she was going to say was lost as the orgasm exploded within. The breath stuttered in her throat and she rocked her hips up, grinding wantonly against him as her cries of pleasure filled the office.

With a groan, he captured her lips, then started to withdraw, but she held onto him. "You don't need to pull out, Cullen. I promise I've got this covered."  
He searched her eyes for a moment, then kissed her hard as he thrust back into her tight, wet heat. His hips pumped a few more times, and she could feel his erection throbbing, then, with a shout, his body bowed as he emptied himself deep inside her.

They lay there for a while, basking in the post-orgasmic bliss, then he lifted his head and looked at her. "So, when you said you had it covered..."  
Chuckling, she ran a loving hand over his temple, catching a drop of sweat."There are herbs to help prevent pregnancies. I've been taking them for a while now, but I had to give them time to work. And, that time has now passed."  
He pressed a kiss to her lips. "I didn't even know there was such a thing, but I'm glad you did. Maker's breath, I was so wrong when I thought it could get any better."  
Eventually, they climbed off the desk and stared at the mess on the floor. They looked at each other and laughed. "Totally worth it," he said with a naughty grin.

She helped him pick everything up, but found her eyes kept straying to his ass whenever he bent over. Unable to help herself, she stroked a hand over one firm cheek. He stood up quickly and glanced over his shoulder. "Eve..."  
He stopped talking when he saw the saucy gleam in her eyes, and dumping the paperwork on the desk, he grabbed her hand and pushed her up the ladder. It was a long time before they fell asleep.

The next day, Eve had to put up with some comments about the fact that she was fidgeting a lot on her horse. She pointed out that Dorian wasn't looking very comfortable in the saddle either. That earned her a glare from the Tevinter mage and a bark of proud laughter from Bull. Dorian suddenly smiled, and she prepared herself for his caustic comeback. "Well, at least I didn't wake half of Skyhold with screams of pleasure."  
The whole group broke out in a shout of laughter, as Eve cursed the hole in Cullen's roof. She decided they needed to find some way of soundproofing the room.

"Nothing to say, Inquisitor?" Dorian pressed.  
"I don't think she can speak because she's blushing so much." Bull replied with a snort of amusement.  
"I'm not blushing, it's the heat."  
"Inquisitor, it's night-time, and it's freezing." Cassandra shot down her defence in seconds.

"Oh, right." She glared up at the full moon shining down on the Hissing Wastes. In the midst of trying to think of another excuse, her mind turned to Cullen and she smiled, thinking of what he'd done to cause her to scream so loudly. By the Maker, she really needed to get back to him as soon as possible.

"You're thinking of him!" Cassandra laughingly accused.  
"I... I'm not."  
"You are," Dorian confirmed. "You only smile like that when you're talking to, or thinking of, the Commander."  
Eve cleared her throat. "Perhaps we should get to the next tomb."  
Their laughter followed her as she spurred her horse into a gallop. Chuckling at the camaraderie, she lifted her head and let the cold wind cool her heated countenance.

But a time was coming which would shake the foundations of friendship, and cause Eve to question the trust she'd placed in those of the inner circle.


	37. Chapter 37

**Unmasked**

The trip to the Winter Palace was a success in so much as Celene still reigned, but the mission left a sour taste in Eve's mouth. She couldn't comprehend how people could live like that; never knowing who was going to stab you in the back – either verbally or literally. Orlais was a viper's nest where you couldn't tell friend from foe, and secrets were uncovered with unholy glee. It mattered not to the nobles that there were dead bodies scattered throughout the kitchens and living areas; all they cared about was getting their food and drink served to them without delay.

She knew her distaste was shared by Cullen, who had spent the majority of his time being courted by men and women alike. Eve had been dangerously close to letting loose with a shock of electricity when one man had touched Cullen's backside, and only Josephine's earlier warning about behaving had stopped the noble from getting some nasty burns around the groin area.

At the end of the evening, she managed to escape onto one of the numerous balconies. But even there she was tracked down by Morrigan. Eve remembered Solona talking about the daughter of Flemeth, and although her friend had initially been wary, the two had become close by the end of the Blight. Upon first meeting Morrigan, Eve could well understand Solona's cautiousness, however, the mage had been nothing but helpful during the mission, so when Morrigan explained that she had been asked to assist the Inquisition, Eve was happy to have her on board.

Alone again, Eve rested on the balustrade, gazing out into the darkness and listening to the distant chatter of drunken guests. She turned at the sound of footsteps and smiled as Cullen walked towards her. His hand covered hers. "This has been quite the night. How are you doing?"  
She managed a tired smile. "I'm fine, just glad it's all over with. I can't wait to leave this place."  
He chuckled and moved his hand to her shoulders, rubbing gently. "Not to your liking?"  
"No." Eve grimaced. "I think I'd rather face a few giants than deal with any more nobles."

He drew back a little and bowed, his hand held out to her. "Would you do me the honour of accepting my hand for this dance?"  
Eve's eyes widened in surprise, knowing of his reluctance to dance after she'd pestered him throughout the ball. "I thought you didn't dance?"  
His warm brown eyes lifted and she saw a glimmer of amusement. "For you, I'm willing to try."  
She gave him a beautiful smile, and his heart skipped a beat at the sight. Then she curtseyed and took his hand. He slipped one arm around her waist and his hand closed around hers, then they danced under the moonlight, using the strains of the soft melody that drifted from the ballroom as their guide.

It was a few days after the return to Skyhold when she went to the stables with the intent of getting Blackwall to join the next game of Wicked Grace. The first had gone down very well, although not so much for Cullen who had literally lost the shirt on his back to Josephine's skilful handling of the cards. However, upon entering the stables, she found it empty. Turning to leave, she was stopped by a messenger who handed her a crumpled note.

A sense of foreboding washed over her as she read the brief contents, and it didn't escape her notice that the missive seemed to have come from one of Leliana's reports. She filed that away for later and gathered as many of the inner circle as she could find, then set out with all haste to Val Royeaux.

They entered the city to find a large group of people gathered around the gallows. A wretched man was on his knees as the charges were read out against him. Eve recognised the man's name, Mornay, as being the same one mentioned in the missive she'd been handed back in Skyhold.  
"Well, shit," Varric said, a frown gathering on his brow as he looked on the scene. Eve wholeheartedly agreed with the sentiment. Mornay was roughly pulled to his feet and a rope placed around his neck. Just as it seemed that Mornay's fate was sealed, Blackwall walked onto the gallows, declaring the man's innocence. "He was given orders and followed them like any good soldier."  
The Orlesian guard strode forward. "Then bring me the man who gave the order!"

Blackwall looked out over the crowd and his eyes, full of regret, met Eve's. She stepped towards the gallows. "Blackwall..." She wanted to ask him what he was doing, why had he become involved, but he spoke before any further words could leave her lips.  
"No, I am not Blackwall. I never was Blackwall. He is dead, and has been for years."  
The prisoner was staring at Blackwall intently, then his eyes rounded. "You! After all these years..."  
Blackwall gave a nod to Mornay. "I'm done hiding. I gave the order. The crime is mine. I am Thom Rainier."

Eve felt like she'd been punched in the gut and staggered back as the revelation sunk in. Her brain whirled with questions and a flicker of anger started to burn inside of her. She watched, stupefied as Rainier was taken away, then she regained her senses. "Cassandra, we're going to need rooms at a hotel while this mess is ongoing, and Varric, can you send a message to Skyhold? The advisers need to know what's happened."  
"And you, boss?" Bull asked.  
She gritted her teeth, trying to rein in her anger. "I'm going to have a chat with the imposter." The last word was spat out with all the contempt she felt for the man who had lied to her.

Having vented a lot of her anger on Rainier, Eve left the prison unsure of how to handle the situation: should she save him or let him die? The questions battered her tired brain as she followed Cassandra to the hotel where they would be staying. The night brought little council, and she hoped that the advisers would provide her with some options.  
Much to her relief, it was Cullen who showed up with the message. Seeing the strain on her face, he pulled her into a comforting hug. "How are you holding up?"  
The tightening of her arms around his waist told him how much this betrayal had hurt her. Cullen sighed and pressed a kiss to her cheek, dreading the moment when she learned the full story.

Eve pulled back and led him to her room so that they could talk in private. "What are my options?" she said, getting straight down to business.  
He explained that the Inquisition could free Rainier, if that's what she wanted to do. Eve's grey eyes sought his. "What do you think of all this?"  
Rubbing a hand over his face, he replied, "I think his actions were despicable, but I also think it took a great deal of courage to step forward and save Mornay."  
Eve paced the floor. "Maker's balls! How did this even happen? How did Leliana not pick up on this?"

Cullen glanced away, knowing that Eve would catch on. He heard the swift intake of breath and looked up to see her eyes glinting with fury. "She knew!" Eve recalled the crumpled note that looked as though it was from one of Leliana's reports. "She fucking knew and didn't say anything!"  
An angry tear was roughly wiped away. "Is there anything else I should know about? Any other fucking imposters that Leliana is hiding?"

Hating to see her hurt and angry, he stopped her in mid-stride and pulled her to the sofa where he sat her down. The room had a small bar and he quickly poured out a glass of wine for both of them. Eve managed to unclench her fist long enough to take the glass from him, then without hesitation, she swallowed the contents and threw the glass at the wall.  
"Feel better?"  
"Not really, no. How could she not tell us something this important?"  
"I don't know. Perhaps, she thought he deserved a second chance?"

Eve didn't reply but got up and fetched herself another glass of wine.  
"Have you decided what to do with Blackwall?"  
"Yes, we're going to get him out of there."  
"And Leliana?"  
Eve glanced at him. "What about her?"  
"Have you decided what to do with her?"

The wine quickly went the same route as the first one, but the glass managed to avoid the same fate as its predecessor. "My hands are tied. She's an excellent spymaster and I won't risk the Inquisition by removing her from that role. Also, can you imagine how that would affect morale? Leliana is as much responsible for starting the Inquisition as Cassandra. So, there's nothing I can do, but that doesn't mean I have to trust her or like her!"

Cullen was saddened by her words, knowing how well the two women had gotten along. He stood up and walked towards her. "Eve, you can't..."  
"Don't. Not right now. I'm too angry to think clearly and I can't discuss this in a reasonable manner."  
His hand cupped her face. "I understand, but I'm here when you're ready to talk about this."  
She managed a small smile. "Thank you. Now, I suppose we should get back to Skyhold and sort out a way to free Rainier without pissing off Orlais."

The group stepped out of the hotel, and Eve came to a sudden stop, causing Vivienne to exclaim, "Darling, really, do give me some notice before you come to a screeching halt."  
But Eve barely registered the comment, as she stared into the face of her mother.


	38. Chapter 38

**A Face from the Past**

Upon seeing Eve, an obsequious smile stretched Venema's thin lips. "Evelyn, my child. It's so good to see you."  
Already inflamed by the betrayal of two friends, Eve's grey eyes rested coldly on her mother's face. "It's Inquisitor. You have no child, or have you forgotten how you were ready to tell people that your mage daughter was dead?"  
Venema's smile faltered, and a gleam of fury filled her pale blue eyes. "You are mistaken, girl. Now give your mother a kiss on the cheek."

The small rejected child inside of Eve wanted to believe the overtures of motherly love, but one look into Venema's calculating gaze told her everything she needed to know. Her mother, always one to take any opportunity for advancing up the social ladder, just wanted people to know her connection to the high and mighty Inquisitor.

Eve's fists clenched as she recalled her last day at home and remembered the hurtful words. "No, you are mistaken. I am not your daughter." She inclined her head graciously. "Now, if you will excuse me, I have important business to attend to."  
She started to walk past her mother, but thin fingers gripped her wrist and sharp nails dug into her skin. "You will not humiliate me again, Evelyn," Venema hissed in a low voice. "Bad enough that I gave birth to a mage, but the Maker saw fit to make something of you, and in so doing brought glory to House Trevelyan. You will not take that away from me!"

Eve stared at her mother in stunned silence. She'd known this little display was only to improve Venema's standing, but hearing it termed in such a harsh manner bruised Eve's heart. Dorian placed a hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry, my dear, one doesn't get to choose one's relatives and so you always end up with some undesirables in the family."  
Venema's hand dropped away from Eve, shocked at finding herself being described in such disagreeable terms.

Lifting her head, Eve met her mother's eyes. "Thank you for at least being honest about your reasons for speaking to me. I don't believe there is anything left to say."  
Seeing the pallor of Eve's skin, Cullen took her arm and led her away. The tension he felt in her body and the stony expression warned him now was not a good time to discuss what had happened.

Cole drew close to Eve. "Pain, pride, pressure, pricking at her like thorns. I can help her." He looked at Eve from beneath the brim of his hat. "I can help you, too."  
She met his large blue eyes, her own misted with tears. "Do what you can for her," she said. With a nod, he was gone. The journey back to Skyhold was accomplished in relative silence, no one feeling in the mood to talk.

Upon their return, Eve still refused to talk about what had happened in Val Royeaux. When Cullen tried to get her to open up, she told him that she needed to deal with Blackwall first. So, he gave her the space she needed. During the day, she would be mostly absent, but at night, she would come to his bed and find some peace in his arms.

It was agreed that the Inquisition's underworld contacts would be used to free Rainier. Two days passed before Blackwall arrived at Skyhold under cover of darkness. The next day, Eve walked to her seat, never imagining for one moment that she would be judging one of her friends. From what she'd learned of the real Warden Constable Blackwall, she felt it would be a fitting tribute to the man if she followed his original plan, and so Rainier was told that he would stay to fight Corypheus, and if he survived that, then he would join the Grey Wardens.

As soon as the trial was over, Eve went to her quarters and prepared for the journey to Emprise du Lion. She'd told herself that she would deal with her feelings regarding the reappearance of her mother, and Leliana's betrayal after Blackwall's fate had been decided. But, now that the time had come, she found herself shying away from the issues. Walking out onto the balcony, her gaze rested on the beautiful scenery, but with her thoughts in disarray, she failed to appreciate it.

"You're hurting, hating, hiding away from it all." A gentle hand touched her shoulder. "Let me help."  
Her head fell forward, silently giving permission. As he spoke, the anger and pain that had clouded her heart slowly dispersed and the tears she'd been holding back began to fall. Her grip on the balustrade loosened and she crumpled to her knees.

Cole disappeared and reappeared in Cullen's office. "She needs you now."  
Without questioning the vague statement, Cullen quickly made his way to Eve's quarters and found her on the balcony. He gathered her into his arms and carried her to the sofa. When there were no more tears left, she looked up at him and her hand moved over the rough stubble of his jaw. "I'm sorry I withdrew from you. I wanted to talk, but I just... I couldn't find the words."  
He pressed a kiss to her lips. "I know how that goes. I'm just glad you're all right now."  
She smiled, though her expression was rueful. "Well, I still need to have a chat with Leliana, and apologise to you and Josephine for making it so damn awkward in the war room."  
He grinned and slid a hand down her back. "Well, I know how you can make it up to me."  
Her body immediately became heated. "Do you now?"  
"Mhm, but after you've spoken to Leliana."  
She blew out a long breath and climbed off him. "Damn it."

As she walked up the stairs to the rookery, she tried to decide on how to approach the situation, and what she should say. But in the end, she decided that her own words would depend on Leliana's explanation. Eve tamped down the anger, knowing that was definitely not the way to start the conversation.

She saw Leliana attaching a note to the leg of a raven. As soon as the task was completed, Eve stepped forward. "A word outside, if you please." Knowing that many of Leliana's people were in the rookery, and having no desire to belittle the Spymaster, Eve kept her tone calm. Leliana met the cool gaze and with a short nod, she opened the door and they stepped out onto the battlements.

After walking in silence for a few minutes, Eve judged that they were far enough away to ensure that no angry words could be overheard. She stopped and turned to face the woman she'd called a friend.  
"Why didn't you say something?"  
Leliana leaned against the wall, her eyes alert, her head held high. "Because we've all done things that we later regret, and I thought he deserved a second chance."  
Eve rubbed the bridge of her nose. "But you didn't think it was worth informing the other advisors or myself?"  
Leliana's blue eyes glittered, but whether with anger or some other emotion, Eve couldn't tell. The woman was a bard and excelled in hiding her feelings. "Would you have let him stay if you'd known about his past?"  
"I guess we'll never know." She slowly breathed out, fighting back the anger that wanted to make a reappearance, and only spoke when she felt it recede. "It's all very well for you to stand there and say he deserved a second chance, but you weren't going out on missions with him. You weren't relying on him to watch your back, but we were. When we're out there fighting Maker knows what, we need to be able to trust each other, to know that the person by your side is going to keep you safe. You put our friends at risk by sending us out with an imposter."

Leliana looked startled at the verbal attack but answered the accusations without hesitation. "Do you honestly think I would have put you or the others at risk? I checked out his history and all the good he'd done since assuming Blackwall's identity. It seemed to me that Rainier wanted to atone for his crime, and what better way to do that than by helping to save the world?"

It was Eve's turn to look surprised, but then she remembered the circumstances of her first meeting with Blackwall. "When I met Blackwall in the Hinterlands, he was helping a group of people get back their possessions from bandits. I guess that slipped my mind."  
"That wasn't his only good deed. Do you know why Blackwall wanted to recruit him?"  
Eve shook her head.  
"Rainier was in a tavern near Churneau when a member of the village militia began harassing the barmaid. He didn't think twice about stepping in and saving the woman."  
Eve sighed. "It seems I owe you an apology. Finding out that you'd held back information immediately on the heels of Blackwall's lie coming to light, I just let my temper get the better of me." She held out her hand. "I'm sorry."  
Leliana smiled and took the outstretched hand. "I'm sorry, too. I should have trusted you with the information. I promise, nothing else has been kept from you, nor will it."  
"Thanks, Leliana."

As they turned back to the rookery, Leliana said, "I hope the recent events haven't put you off visiting Val Royeaux?"  
Eve chuckled. "No, why?"  
"Well, I need a new pair of shoes."  
"Oh, for shoes, I'm willing to forget the past," Eve said with a laugh.  
Their eyes met and Leliana smiled. "I'm glad to hear that. Then we'll leave after you get back from Emprise."

The situation in Emprise du Lion took a lot longer to sort out then Eve had anticipated, so it was almost three weeks later when they finally got to go shopping. Eve hadn't wanted to leave Cullen so soon after such a long time away and managed to talk him into joining them, Dorian had persuaded Bull, Varric thought the experience would be good for Cole, and Josephine, Leliana, and Vivienne had dragged an unwilling Cassandra along. They spent the night in one of the many splendid hotels that littered the large city, and the next day, they set off in good spirits with full purses.

The ladies mercilessly teased Eve about buying some sexy underwear to show off to Cullen, so that by the time they left the shop, Eve's face was bright red but she was laughing, and secretly couldn't wait to show Cullen what she'd bought.  
The men had all ended up at a winery and were busy tasting a variety of fine wines when the ladies found them. It was Leliana who decided that it would be a good time to stop for lunch, whispering to Eve that the men needed some food to soak up the alcohol.

They crossed the square, laughing and talking, and during lunch, Leliana told the story of the dragon's head, jokingly named Madame Snappy-Snips, that adorned the wall of the cafe. They then continued shopping until the stores closed, and returned to the hotel laden down with bags, exhausted, but happy.


	39. Chapter 39

**The End in Sight**

It was a couple of days after the shopping trip to Val Royeaux that Eve remembered the sexy underwear she'd bought. An idea formed in her mind and she dashed off to see Leliana. Ten minutes later, she was back in her quarters preparing to surprise the Commander. She placed a few dabs of her new perfume strategically around her body, slipped a long coat over the very skimpy ensemble she wore and made her way to Cullen's quarters. From the walkway, she saw Leliana's messenger talking to Cullen and leading him away.  
Eve chuckled, wondering what story the poor messenger had come up with, then she entered the office and placed a sheet of paper on Cullen's desk. There was a drop of perfume on it to get his attention, and a brief message: 'I'm upstairs.'

She quickly climbed the ladder, slipped off her coat to reveal lacy black underwear and got on the bed. After trying out a few positions, she settled for lying on her side in a provocative manner. However, when she heard the door open, she was startled to hear the tramping of feet as numerous people entered the office.

She could hear Cullen addressing the soldiers and could only hope that the meeting would be a short one. She didn't want to ruin her plans by falling asleep. Then she could hear some of the soldiers whispering, which was soon brought to an end by Cullen. "Is there something you wish to share, Davis?"  
"Sorry, Commander, it's just... well, there's a really nice scent in your office."  
A few other soldiers agreed to this, one fellow going so far as to ask if this was a perfume the Inquisitor wore, and if so, would the Commander mind asking her for the name of it as he wanted to buy something for his lady?  
By this point, Cullen realised the soldiers were right about the scent, but as it didn't match the perfume Eve wore, he was somewhat baffled.  
Davis piped up. "It does seem to be emanating from your desk, Ser."

Cullen looked around his desk, then looked down at the files he'd just brought back with him. He lifted them, saw the message and got a whiff of the enticing aroma and hastily dropped the pile back on his desk before anyone else saw it. Clearing his throat and fighting the flush that threatened to cover his face, he told the soldiers, "All right. I think we're done. We'll have a meeting tomorrow."  
The soldiers grinned but soon left the Commander alone.

Eve was fighting back a fit of the giggles when Cullen climbed up to his bedroom. "Maker's breath, you..."  
The words dried up on his tongue when he saw her stretched out on his bed wearing practically nothing. A seductive smile played across Eve's lips. "I was hoping to get your opinion. I think these lacy bits might be a bit much." She ran a finger across one plump breast that looked ready to spill from its cup. "And this little silver bow just doesn't look right." Her finger traced back across the breast and down between her cleavage.  
Cullen's gaze hungrily followed the direction of her finger as he pulled off his clothes, then he pounced on her. "You, my sweet Eve, are a naughty minx."  
She chuckled, then moaned as he captured her lips with a passionate kiss.

It was the last bit of fun they were to have for a while because the next day, word reached the Inquisition that Corypheus was on the move and heading into the Arbor Wilds. Plans were made, and instructions sent out. The scouts were told to slow the enemy down, while Cullen prepared the army to march.

Before leaving, she'd tried to give him back the lucky coin, knowing that he was going to be out there fighting. He'd refused it, telling her she still had the more dangerous job. She'd hugged him tightly. "I love you, please take care of yourself out there."  
His lips covered hers in a slow, tender kiss. "I love you, too. Make sure you come back to me, Eve."  
She'd entertained serious doubts as to whether she would be able to do as he'd asked when Corypheus' dragon had reappeared and chased them across a bridge, but they'd made it safely into the Temple of Mythal. She had followed the advice given by Solas and Morrigan and completed the puzzles. When questioned by Cassandra about her decision, Eve had explained that the Sentinel elves shouldn't suffer just because they chose to do their duty and protect the Temple.

At the Well of Sorrows, Eve had decided against entering the pool. In fact, if there had been some other way of defeating Corypheus without disturbing the water, she'd have taken it. But, she knew they needed all the help they could get, and so she agreed to let Morrigan drink. With regret, she turned to Abelas. "I'm sorry about this."

Seeing the defeated look in his eyes was painful, and only Solas' words seemed to bring Abelas some comfort. When Morrigan had emerged from the water, she'd been confused and disorientated. Thankfully, that cleared up in time for her to activate the Eluvian so everyone could escape Corypheus.

There was much to discuss upon their return to Skyhold, although the discussion had to be put on hold after Morrigan's child wandered off through the Eluvian. Eve had helped search the Fade for Kieran, and when they found him, the consequences of drinking from the Well became known. Kieran had been talking to an older woman, and upon seeing this, Morrigan called out to her mother, her tone angry, and yet, at the same time afraid.

Eve was a little overwhelmed to know that she'd met Flemeth, but that emotion gave way to astonishment when she discovered Flemeth's true identity. Maker's balls, Eve's problems with her mother seemed minor in comparison to those between Morrigan and Flemeth. Kieran had been recovered safely, and Morrigan had been shown the way in which she could help to defeat Corypheus. Eve was relieved upon hearing that news, especially after they'd discovered that the Darkspawn Magister could resurrect himself by using the body of a Grey Warden.

Events were rapidly drawing to a conclusion, and the final battle with Corypheus was imminent. Eve went to Cullen's office, wanting to spend as much time with him as possible while she still had a chance. A messenger said that the Commander had gone to the small chapel, and she'd made her way there.

Eve found Cullen on one knee praying in front of a statue of Andraste. She leaned against the doorframe, taking comfort in his words.  
"Though all before me is shadow, yet shall the Maker be my guide. I shall not be left to wander the drifting roads of the Beyond. For there is no darkness in the Maker's light, and nothing that he has wrought shall be lost."  
She slipped into the room and closed the door behind her. "It's a lovely prayer."  
As usual, he showed no surprise at her presence. "It's for those we have lost. And those I am afraid to lose."  
"You're afraid?" She moved closer to him and saw his clasped hands tighten.  
"Of course I am! Corypheus possessed that Grey Warden at Mythal's Temple. What else is he capable of? It's only a matter of time before he retaliates. We must draw strength wherever we can."  
He stood up and turned towards Eve. "When the times comes, you will be thrown into his path again. Andraste preserve me. I must send you to him."

She pulled out the coin which she'd had modified so that it be worn as an amulet. "There's nothing to worry about. I have luck on my side, remember?"  
He chuckled, but the worried look remained in his eyes. "That's less comforting than I'd hoped."  
His arms closed around her, and she hugged him hard while battling her own fears and doubts about whether she would return from the inevitable fight with Corypheus.  
His warm breath fluttered across her neck. "Whatever happens, you will come back."  
"I will," Eve whispered, injecting as much confidence as she could into the words.  
"To believe anything else would... I can't."

Taking his hand, she led him to her quarters. The sun was setting low over the Frostback Mountains, painting the snow-covered peaks a brilliant rose-gold colour. Against this beautiful setting, they undressed and then climbed on the bed where he took his time exploring her body. When he entered Eve, his lips covered hers in a loving kiss edged with desperation.

He made love to her slowly, building the passion gradually until their bodies glistened with sweat and their breath came faster. She wanted it to last forever, but soon she felt the signs of her approaching orgasm. Her face pressed into the crook of his neck, and his arms tightened around her. "I love you, Eve."  
The words, laden with so much feeling, pushed her over the edge and she held on to him, praying that this wouldn't be their last night together. "I love you, too, Cullen."

Corypheus made his move the following day while they were in the war room. Not knowing whether she'd be coming back, Eve took the time to thank the advisors for their work on behalf of the Inquisition. She saw a nerve twitch in Cullen's jaw and wanted to tell him that everything would be all right, but there was no time. Their eyes met and she managed a smile, then left the room.

She stepped out into the courtyard and saw that her friends were geared up and ready to fight. She chuckled even as her heart swelled with emotion. "Thank you, for your help, your support, but most of all, for your friendship. Now let's go and kick Corypheus' ass once and for all."  
Their cheers echoed throughout the Frostback Mountains as they mounted up and left Skyhold.


	40. Chapter 40

**Author's note:** _Just a warning - there are some Trespasser spoilers near the end of the chapter. I've marked the section with a double line so you'll know where to stop if you want to avoid them. Also, as this is the final chapter, I also want to take this opportunity to thank you all for the reviews and for reading :)_

 **An Impossible Dream Realised**

The fight was long and hard, but everyone rallied together, and with Morrigan's help as a dragon, Eve was finally able to bring an end to Corypheus. However, in order to do this, the foci had been destroyed. She found Solas kneeling over the broken pieces, his expression sad.  
"I'm sorry, I know you wanted the orb saved."  
He stood up and turned to her. "It's not your fault. It was not supposed to happen this way."  
Eve was puzzled by his comment. "What do you mean?"  
But he merely shook his head. "No matter what comes, I want you to know that you shall always have my respect."  
"Solas..."

Before she could question him, Cassandra shouted, "Inquisitor, are you alive?"  
Thinking she would have a chance to talk to Solas later, she went to allay the Seeker's anxiety. It was a relief to see that all her friends had survived, although some looked a little bruised and battered. After confirming that it was time to return to Skyhold, she turned to go and find Solas, but even as she reached the top of the stairs, she knew that he was already gone.

Saddened as she was by his departure, she wasn't going to let it ruin the Inquisition's victory, and everyone else returned to Skyhold amidst much enthusiastic cheering and waving.

Climbing the steps, she thought back to a year ago when she'd accepted the role of Inquisitor. Things back then had been uncertain and she'd been a nervous wreck taking on such a responsibility. But now, she was comfortable in her role, and she knew that was due, in large part, to the friends who had helped to keep her grounded. She reached the advisors and was immediately pulled into Cullen's arms and kissed hard. After the worry of wondering whether she'd see him again, she savoured the embrace and the touch of his lips even more than usual.

During the course of the celebration banquet that followed, Eve managed to have a chat with all her friends. She asked Blackwall if this was what he wanted; he'd smiled and said it was, and that now he could truly be the person that the real Blackwall had wanted him to be.

She'd congratulated Cassandra on her appointment to the role of Divine, before moving over to drink a round with Bull, Krem, and the Chargers, who were discussing what they would do next. Eve pointed out that she always found them the best fights. Bull laughed, agreed, and she knew he'd be sticking around for some time to come. Cole said that he felt light enough that he could slip back into the Fade, but said that he was going to be staying around for the immediate future. Eve thanked him for all his help, especially in the matter of her mother.

And, then there was Cullen. His love and support had helped Eve get through some tough times. He was her friend and her lover... in short, he was her impossible dream come true.

 **T‑R‑E‑S‑P-A-S-S-E-R**

Two years later the Inquisition was, once again, under threat. Not from a darkspawn Magister, but from the countries they had helped. In her role as Divine, Cassandra had done her best to keep the political pressure off the Inquisition for the last two years, but things had come to a head now.

Eve was a little annoyed that after all the good works done by the Inquisition, they were now being eyed with distrust. However, Eve admitted to herself, that she was ready to step back. She'd had a lot of resolution in her life, especially in regards to her parents. That had happened shortly after the defeat of Corypheus. Eve had received a message from them, asking if they could come to visit her. Both Cullen and Cole had advised her to meet them, and so after sending back a reply, she'd waited nervously for their arrival. It had gone better than she'd hoped, and Eve knew that Cole's help had been instrumental in mending her relationship with her parents.

Her relationship with Cullen had continued to grow in both love and friendship. He had continued to fight the addiction so that the pain and tiredness were pretty much a thing of the past, and he no longer needed the potions that Dorian and the others had concocted.

All these thoughts drifted through Eve's mind while she went around doing the necessary mingling. A couple of hours later, after escaping from Arl Teagan, Eve needed a break from the nobles and returned to Cullen, only to find him playing with a large mabari. As she drew closer, she heard his instructions to the hound. "You there! You're supposed to dodge the ball. If that had been a fireball, you would be dead by now."  
Laughing, she pointed out that perhaps Cullen was doing things wrong.

He chuckled and greeted her with a kiss. "The Inquisition will change after this. I'm not yet sure what that will mean. Still, I've found certainty in my life now; the Council won't change that."  
He cupped her face with one hand. "Marry me?"  
Eve was so stunned by the question that she couldn't immediately answer. The bashful Templar he'd once been, made a brief appearance. "I mean, will you..." He sighed. "I had a plan, and... there wasn't a dog. But you were there... it doesn't matter. I've thought of little else, and I don't need a plan. Only to know if you would..."  
At that point, her stupor dissipated. "I would! Cullen, I will."  
A handsome smile lit up his face. "Do you think Cass... I mean, Divine Victoria would do the honours?" Eve smiled. "I think she would, but I am not getting married in this outfit. Give me an hour."

Rushing off, Eve grabbed Vivienne, Leliana, and lastly, Dorian, apologizing briefly to Duke Cyril for the interruption. She asked Varric to gather everyone else and dashed off with her three fashion experts in tow. It was incredible what they managed to do in such a short time, and soon Eve was dressed in a long white gown, with flowers twined in her chestnut hair. They even managed to put together a posy of yellow and white flowers. In an effort to keep the event secret, a long coat was thrown over the whole ensemble while they made their way back to the gazebo.

Eve smiled when she saw her friends gathered around. Even Blackwall had managed to get away from the Grey Wardens to support the Inquisition. They parted to allow Eve through, then closed around the couple to hide the proceedings. Leliana removed the coat and Dorian gave Eve away.  
Cullen smiled and took her hand. "You look so beautiful."  
Cassandra smiled as she performed the service. They said their vows, and he slipped the ring onto Eve's finger. Unsure of how the mark would affect the ring, they'd agreed to use the right hand.  
Eve looked into Cullen's honey-brown eyes and was reminded of the first time she'd seen him. "I love you, my husband."  
His arms tightened around her. "And I love you, my wife."  
The party cheered when Cullen and Eve kissed for the first time as husband and wife. After the coat was put over the gown, they all moved off to the tavern for a couple of celebratory drinks.

All too soon, it was time to attend the Council. Eve changed back into her old clothes and went off with Josephine. The day, however, turned out to be a lot more exciting than she'd bargained for. After a murder at the Winter Palace, Eve had ended up chasing some very hostile Qunari through various Eluvians, which had culminated in their death and a rather surprising meeting with Solas.

What she learned from him was upsetting, and extremely worrying. Eve promised that she wouldn't give up on him and that she would find some way to change his mind. There was so much more she wanted to know, to say, but when the mark on her hand flared up, she forgot everything and gritted her teeth against the pain.

By then her mark had deteriorated so much that she knew it was killing her. She'd done her best not to dwell on it as there were more important matters to deal with, but deep down she'd been scared.  
Solas knelt in front of her and released a strong pulse of magic. Suddenly all the pain was gone, then looking down at her hand and forearm she understood why; somehow, he'd turned her arm to stone, stopping just below the elbow joint. The green glow was finally gone. With a swift movement he removed the damaged section of her arm, and with a sad farewell, he walked through the Eluvian.

She staggered back to her friends, shocked at the loss of a limb, and exhausted by the last few hours where she'd battled to keep her mark from hurting any of her friends. They returned back to the Winter Palace, and Eve found Cullen waiting anxiously in the room where the Eluvian was being kept. Immediately, he pulled her close; it was then he noticed the missing arm. "Sweet Maker! Are you all right, Eve?"  
"I think so, just a bit tired."

He immediately picked her up and carried her off to their quarters, listening as she explained everything that had happened. He placed her on the bed. "Get some sleep, love."  
She yawned, but said, "I need to get back to the Council."  
"Damn the Council. You need to rest!"  
She managed a smile. "I do love it when you get all masterful, but once I've dealt with them, then I can come back here and sleep without worrying about being disturbed."  
She went to push herself up and forgetting the loss of her arm, she started to roll to the side."That's going to take a bit of getting used to."

She looked down at what remained of her left arm, and quietly asked, "Does... does this bother you?"  
He strode forward and lifted her face to his. "No! I fell in love with you, Eve, not your bloody arm!" His tone softened. "You came back to me, that's all that matters."  
The welcoming pressure of his lips backed up his words. He helped her to dress, and took every opportunity to touch her, which led to them leaving the room a little later than anticipated.

Eve was still a little flushed when they reached the Council, but she walked into the room and gave, what she considered, to be one of her best speeches. This was due to the fact that she was no longer constrained by the nuances of politics. She didn't care whether they liked what she had to say or not.

Eve told them in no uncertain terms that the Inquisition would not be chained by Orlais, nor would they disband under pressure from Ferelden. She knew there was worse to come, but she had faith that when the time came, the right person would be found. She handed the Inquisition's directive over to Josephine and left the room.

After that, it was time to say goodbye to her friends. There were fond farewells and promises to keep in touch; which, of course, they most definitely did.

As for Eve and Cullen, their fighting days were over. They bought a large farm with plenty of outdoor space, and one building was used to house Templars who suffered from lyrium withdrawal. They named the mabari, Dodge, mainly because that's what Cullen kept telling him to do. The dog never did quite get the hang of that command.  
Eve sat on a bench outside their home, watching the sun setting and marvelled at how her life had turned out. Cullen joined her, smiling as he placed a hand on her rounded stomach. It seemed impossible dreams could come true.

 _The End_


End file.
